I was doing really well after break-up until... now confusion and anger

[pandora_be]

Well, my ex and I broke up after one year intimate relationship about 2,5 months ago. After many advice I decided 2 months ago to go no contact.

 

But now I'm having a very hard time, during this period my ex was abroad so no temptation for me to get in touch.

 

Since she's back in the country now - you know via fb there is always this via via sensory system that delivers what you don't want to know about them - I found out that: she still has feelings for me, is angry because I went NC, is 2 proud/shy to break NC herself, but in the end doesn't want me back.

 

I also learned that she is still single, so no replacement guy, but she has some kind of crush at a guy whom she barely knows and is trying very hard to get his attention. She believes that he or another new love will help her get over me! She is trying so hard that she is organizing a singles party with a friend of hers to lure the fish into the bait.

 

Gosh, I thought I was over her, but this news from the unsensitive common fb connection we have, bombed me back into 2 months ago. - Why did I have to find this out!!! -

 

Before I get any wrong ideas, what can I do? Or how can I make sure that I don't do anything and stay NC, anybody experience with this?

[wilsonx]

You might have talked about marriage, but you weren't married. Realizing there's a certain expectation (not to mention feeling so close to something you really wanted) is one of the reasons you've having problems coping. Understand and remind yourself that you didn't marry. And frankly, be glad you didn't.

 

You may not realize this now, but you were generally played. Things were going fine until you slipped, said something inappropriate or was caught in a bad mood. At that point, she realized you were capable of expressing yourself outside the realm of her control, and it angered her. This isn't love, or at least not the kind you want to get hitched to long term. If a woman loves you for you, because of you and how you are, she'll be more than willing to put up with the ups and downs. It's a different thing if you're exposed as a liar or a cheat, but frankly, if a woman's feelings (or needs) are strong enough, many will let that slide too...for a time anyway.

 

Stop being so hard on yourself. You tried. Everyone gets hooked on someone that just isn't right for them at one point for another, and the reality that it won't work is painful. It may not seem possible, but someday you'll be overjoyed it didn't. Real love, real dedication, real romance and real desire is free of games, walking on eggshells, regret or pressure. No matter who you meet, date or marry, be careful not to lose yourself. Many make the mistake of turning their partner into their everything. Don't do that.

 

Hang in, heal and keep posting. You'll make it-

 

I am quoting this thread again because its awesome, was posted in the coping forum... read this quote, its so true.

 

BLOCK HER FROM FACEBOOK, god damnit.... tough love!

 

Thats not NC bro.

[pandora_be]

I am quoting this thread again because its awesome, was posted in the coping forum... read this quote, its so true.

 

BLOCK HER FROM FACEBOOK, god damnit.... tough love!

 

Thats not NC bro.

 

Thx, I love the quote, well she is angry because I blocked her and all of her friends at FB and didn't talk to her for 2 months (no fb, not texting, calls whatever) but we still have common friends, which of course I didn't block and one of them was such a ******* (something bad) to tell me the 'happy' news about her being at home again and her crazy plans...

 

Guess this is just one to swallow and move on again... that quote really shines a new light on things, nevertheless even when it all makes sense it still hurts!