jordjones Posted October 30, 2011 Posted October 30, 2011 (edited) My story is in other forums, but after 2.5 months of NC, about a month ago I wrote my ex an email that essentially told her that I get where I messed up. Since then, we have been in LC, talking lightly via text or phone about once a week (about half initiated from her, half from me). She is a big Texas Rangers fan and on Friday I sent her this email after the devastating Game 6 loss: "This may seem weird. You may think I'm psycho. But game 7 is tonight and I had an epiphany that if I emailed you, it would help the cause... You know that I'm not supersticious, but after last night's debacle, I reckon this couldn't hurt Hope you're settled, by now, in your apartment; at the very least, making the most of your bachelor pad! Application process continues...I'm going to end up being a big city 'suit'...don't know how I feel about that. You know, one of my fondest memories of my time in Boston was getting tear gassed after the Red Sox won the series...pain and pleasure! Doubt Dallas would riot like that, but here's to hoping we get the chance... Take care." OK, I thought this was harmless, light, friendly, whatever, and was the ONLY time I emailed her since the initial email a month ago (besides for 1 youtube link). This is how she responds: "I appreciate your thoughts and hearing from you. Would you mind not sending emails anymore? I don't like when people want to talk and don't use the phone. I'm tired of e-mails and have been. Notice I hardly ever reply, with this exception... Good luck with job stuff." She has emailed me several times in the past. What is also strange is that the email I sent her a month ago seemed to be very well received. I thought her response was pretty rude; I mean damn, who else would she talk to like that? Maybe she was just pissed the Rangers didn't win, maybe she is annoyed with me (but I haven't contacted her much at all), or maybe she just wants to talk on the phone. I also think this is possibly a "**** test." I'm unsure, but it got to me a little bit (she doesn't know this, cause I didn't respond). Thoughts? Edited October 30, 2011 by jordjones
carebear87 Posted October 30, 2011 Posted October 30, 2011 Damn dude. I don't know. Seems like she could be pushing you back. But then again, it could just be that she hates emails in general, and would rather talk on the phone.
joseph17 Posted October 30, 2011 Posted October 30, 2011 Sounds to m e that she want you to call her and talk. She probably wants to hear your voice.An email or text can be taken in so many different contexts which is probably why she wanted to talk to you. It doesn't really sound rude to me she was replying to your email which she pointed out and asked you to not email her and call her instead. So call her and talk to her if that is what you want and see what happens
Author jordjones Posted October 30, 2011 Author Posted October 30, 2011 So, two of the responses are along the lines of calling her. One takes it as her not wanting me to contact her. Anybody else?
Miss S H Posted October 31, 2011 Posted October 31, 2011 I think if you want to reconcile or at least keep things on good terms, ignoring her won't achieve anything. Accept what she has said, as it honestly doesn't sound that rude, more just frustrated. For whatever reason she appears to have lost patience with emails, if it was simply a case of having lost patience with you, she would have said, don't contact me atm. She appears direct enough and not offensive to me. Quit it with the emails and maybe in a day or two if you feel up to it give her a call. I know for myself ATM, Im 6 weeks into a break up, where he initiated and I want to get back. He is tossing and turning between whether or not its a good idea to meet up if it will help etc.... But the fact that I haven't seen him and all we have is texts as communication, drives me MAD. As a female, its hard to distinguish tone and sincerity in words when it comes to matters of the heart. There you go, my two bobs... call her but don't be over the top, and perhaps don't even mention the email liason you have recited to us unless she brings it up.
Emilia Posted October 31, 2011 Posted October 31, 2011 It sounds to me like your ex is frustrated with your communication style. She obviously likes hearing from you which is why she mentioned her preference for phone calls. I think she doesn't quite know what you want from her and she is frustrated. That's how I read it. People don't encourage you to call them if they don't want to hear from you. Is your style quite vague usually? Why did you split up?
Emilia Posted October 31, 2011 Posted October 31, 2011 (edited) sorry double post Edited October 31, 2011 by Emilia duplicate
Author jordjones Posted October 31, 2011 Author Posted October 31, 2011 Hey Emila. My style has been intentionally vague because I want her back and am trying to avoid the friend zone at all costs. Since low contact was established, I've definitely been a bit cryptic, non-available, and have thrown out a few jerky comments. I know this may not be best, but I believe that I really have to avoid kissing her ass. We split essentially because her feelings changed. That was after about 8 months LDR. I know that I can't force feelings/attractions/etc. so I'm just taking things slow, which is a pain. But until she is with another man, and by all accounts she is not, I'm going to give reconciliation a shot. Plus, I've since moved back to her area. We did talk last night via text messaging - she loves to text. It was a pretty good catch up conversation. The email wasn't brought up. We will have that first date soon. Off to the gym and to tan.
flitzanu Posted November 1, 2011 Posted November 1, 2011 ok seriously? how can anyone glean that he should CALL her after an email like that?? she doesn't want to talk to you. plain and simple. quit trying to read between the lines. however, if you DO call her (which i still insist is a mistake) and she actually answers and speaks to you at length, then by all means i'll openly admit that i was wrong. but to me, there's no indication she wants to continue to communicate with you.
Author jordjones Posted November 1, 2011 Author Posted November 1, 2011 Well flitz, we did talk via text for well over an hour the other night. I was down about the email and had a similar impression to you, but when I thought about it, even when we were together, she would get bitchy about the form of communication. About this time last year, when she was in love, she made some snide remarks about her not liking Facebook messages (I had sent her a couple). Since low contact was initiated, she has responded to every call/text within a few minutes, and the conversations have all been decent or whatever. I think she was a little pissed at me because in our previous conversation (before the email), I had made fun of her. I'd given her pretty strong string of negs.
flitzanu Posted November 2, 2011 Posted November 2, 2011 Well flitz, we did talk via text for well over an hour the other night. I was down about the email and had a similar impression to you, but when I thought about it, even when we were together, she would get bitchy about the form of communication. About this time last year, when she was in love, she made some snide remarks about her not liking Facebook messages (I had sent her a couple). Since low contact was initiated, she has responded to every call/text within a few minutes, and the conversations have all been decent or whatever. I think she was a little pissed at me because in our previous conversation (before the email), I had made fun of her. I'd given her pretty strong string of negs. then i'll say i'm wrong so far. but keep your wits about you.
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