SmoothDude Posted October 29, 2011 Posted October 29, 2011 I would like to be in a relationship but I am quite shy when it comes to women. When in a non-sexual, non dating situation, I am the life of the party: very gregarious, funny, seemingly confident. But this thin veneer of apparent confidence quickly melts away in one on one sexual situations with women, including dating, going for the kiss, or accepting an invitation back to her place. At this point, I become extremely anxious and basically 'zone out'; not understanding until much later, that I have been propositioned by a woman. The good news: I am told I am handsome, good looking, sexy, etc. When I go out to nightclubs or other social occasions, women often take my picture in public. These are women I've just been introduced to, or women who don't even bother to talk to me, but just take my picture. When I speak to women, they are very receptive. I was at the market today, and asked a couple of women for help. One was working there, and she walked over and she initiated some innocent physical contact, such as holding my hand for a second or two as I asked her for help with the produce. On the other hand, when women expect me to make a move, I either freeze up, conveniently miss the signs, or just walk away. The anxiety is just too much. Usually, these women will never want to talk to me again at all. How do I get past this sexual anxiety? I've tried reading books, speed dating, going to bars and clubs, having mutual friends introduce me, etc. etc. etc.
flirtatwork Posted October 29, 2011 Posted October 29, 2011 WOW! I am in the exact same situation... wow.. just happened to me like 30 minutes ago.. I have a thread I started just like 15 minutes ago lol.. please help
betterdeal Posted November 1, 2011 Posted November 1, 2011 What are you afraid of? I had phimosis (tight foreskin) which meant erections were painful so I developed an aversion to sex. I lived with it since puberty, so I didn't consciously know I was subconsciously avoiding it. Could it be something physical like that?
Author SmoothDude Posted November 1, 2011 Author Posted November 1, 2011 More like lifelong religious programming.
betterdeal Posted November 1, 2011 Posted November 1, 2011 Imagine it's all a joke, a laugh and just for fun. Sex is not a sin. If you make mistakes, laugh it off. You'll do fine.
Dust Posted November 1, 2011 Posted November 1, 2011 Dude I just read your thread about how you didn’t know how to handle getting hit on by some gay guy at the gym. Now you don’t know how to handle getting hit on by women. I’m going to give you a piece advice. Next time some random chick you find cute takes your picture use it as an ice breaker. By that I mean talk to the girl. Ask her to see the picture. Compliment her on the picture and ask that she let you hold the Camera so you can take a picture of the both of you. Suggest that you meet up again so she can give you a copy of the pictures. Say you’ll treat her to something good to eat. In short flirt and ask out women you like! Make some moves, grab an ass or something. Most important of all kiss the girl!
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