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Posted

This was my last thread to give some background.

 

http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t297067/

 

My ex dumped me back in June and although we tried to be friends I couldn't move on but lately I have felt strong enough to be.

 

Last weekend my ex met up with some mutual friends of ours (they are not close friends so don't know the ins and outs of the break up).

 

Well one of the mutual friends told me that he thought my ex was still fond of me and that he had mentioned places the two of us had been and what good company I was. The friend said he got the impression from my ex that the distance between us was a main reason for the break up (not what my ex told me at the time)

 

I guess it's hard for anyone on here to know what my ex was thinking but does it sound like he still cares or was he just wanting to not badmouth to mutual friends?

 

I kinda want to message him to thank him for being nice about me but I think it would backfire on me.

  • Author
Posted

No opinions anyone? I guess it's hard for anyone to have advice though.

Posted

I think he cares for you, how deeply I don't know. But I don't think you should message him about what he told someone.

Posted

Possibly. But it doesn't matter. If he really knew what he wanted and that included trying again, he'd be beating down your door to get to you. In my opinion, playing Chinese whispers is not a very successful strategy for letting a former partner know that you want to get back together.

 

At this stage, you are begging and hoping for the breadcrumbs and drip-feed. But it's not healthy. And mutual friends passing information between the two of you can be very damaging to your healing, particularly friends who "don't know the ins and outs of the break up." I'm sure they mean well, but right now, you need to focus on your emotional health without interference. When you can see clearly again, you will be in a better position to evaluate the opportunities in front of you - whether those opportunities include your ex, or not.

  • Author
Posted

Thank you for the advice. I think I just needed telling that.

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