araichan Posted October 27, 2011 Posted October 27, 2011 (edited) Hello there, I am a guy living in US in a long distance relationship from 1 year with a girl living in India. We haven’t met yet. We used to talk around 2-3 hours everyday without even recognizing the time. We used to understand each other only by each other’s voice. Our chemistry was so good. We both understood, we can’t be in a serious relationship without meeting each other. But we couldn’t control and even committed to get engaged when I get back to India in nov-dec 2011. 3 month back, she said to me that there is less spice in our relationship. I told her that once we meet, everything will be fine. She promised me that she will be calm and wait for me eagerly until December. But she started to decrease contact, means she wasn’t picking up my calls. When she does pick up, gave me some excuses to not pick up phone. Sometimes she said that she even didn’t got my calls. Also after 5-10 minutes she always said that she need to go. Can’t talk right now with some excuse. After around 40 days, I told her, that I am getting frustrated with her this behavior but instead of understanding she was angry on me and didn’t accepted that she is doing anything like that. At that time I told her that she is going to make next contact with me. We calmly dropped off the phone. 5 days were gone. No call. I was hurt. I became desperate. I tried to contact but she didn’t picked up. I messaged but in vein. I did what I never meant to do. I wrote her a big message mainly saying that she is not the one that I used to talk from one year. She is changed. I want to break up because she don’t care enough. But in my heart, I was madly in love with her. I know in desperation, this was my wrong step. But I was losing trust for her. She replied that I didn’t understand her what may be going on with her. She said that 5 days back, her father read all the messages between us, and his BP is shot up. He is not talking with her and behaving very badly. He also told her to cut all the contacts with me. He took her phone. Phone was not with her, that’s why she couldn’t called me. By breaking up like this, she said I don’t have enough love and trust for her. As per me, in this technology nothing can stop you to even just message or IM from anywhere in 5 days I thought this is another excuse like others to not to contact. So I did another (mistake or not), I called her father and just told my name. He didn’t recognized me by my name. I became sure that he don’t know me and she was lying. So I changed the topic and dropped the phone off without saying anything. Then She messaged me that I broke her heart by calling her dad because there were guests at home that’s why he pretend to not recognizing me. She told me to contact last time on phone to break up. I was not sure that I was right or not. Because her actions were different that what she tells me. But I loved her. I called up and apologized by my heart but she didn’t accepted and broke the relationship. But she said we should remain in contact as we were always and I accepted thinking everything will be fine. I called next day, and she told me that we should be just friends. At that time I agreed to be. After around a week, I told her that I can’t be just friend, because I have feelings for her. If you want to take your time, take it. She told we should continue the talk. After 3-4 days she got angry on nothing and told she needs time. I told her take whatever time you need. After a week, her friend messaged me and said that she is very sick, I should call, but not to mention her name. I couldn’t control myself and called but have to say that just called to say hi, pretending I don’t know she is sick as her friend told me not to say it. She got angry again and broke up. I tried everything to convince her but she was firm on her decision. She said its very hard for her too but it is her final decision. After that its been two weeks, I am in NC(no contact rule) with her. I want her to contact me. Problem is I am going to go in November 2nd week to India for 3 weeks and then come back for atleast a year. Our initial planning was to marry in court in December and bring her with me. But now scenario is different. If I contact her, I know it won’t work out. If I don’t contact her at that time and come back, I will ruin all of my chances to get her back as we won’t me able to meet in over an year. I am in big confusion, please suggest. What should I do now? Thank you. Edited October 27, 2011 by araichan
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