El Brujo Posted October 27, 2011 Posted October 27, 2011 Which is worse, having to date someone who's arrogant, or someone who has no self-esteem at all? I've heard enough negative things about each, but TTBOMK never in the same post. BTW re arrogance... the stereotype of a "desirable" man is one who's considered successful... plenty of those type have to be arrogant to keep their jobs... I've never heard of a mopey CEO who has no self-esteem. I've worked for some who were arrogant as hell and yet they still ended up being total failures in business.
Emilia Posted October 27, 2011 Posted October 27, 2011 The former. Arrogance doesn't bother me usually because more often than not, it's a front in a competitive environment. I can usually get behind that facade easily and see the real person. Of course there are exceptions and when someone is just boorish and a bit of a moron then I lose interest quickly. I wouldn't even know how to deal with a guy with low self-esteem, we just wouldn't work. I think I would do or say something very early on that would damage the relationship because I struggle with walking on egg shells.
Author El Brujo Posted October 27, 2011 Author Posted October 27, 2011 Well... I didn't want to let on at first, but IMO if someone is going to be arrogant, then they should at least have achieved something in their life that's worth being arrogant about. I have no contempt for a rival man who works his butt off and has plenty to show for it... but men who come into good luck by chance and then act hoity-toity about it, are disgusting.
Emilia Posted October 27, 2011 Posted October 27, 2011 Sure. How someone carries himself is only one aspect of his personality, you have to work out what's behind it
Emilia Posted October 27, 2011 Posted October 27, 2011 The former. Arrogance doesn't bother me usually because more often than not, it's a front in a competitive environment. I can usually get behind that facade easily and see the real person. Of course there are exceptions and when someone is just boorish and a bit of a moron then I lose interest quickly. I wouldn't even know how to deal with a guy with low self-esteem, we just wouldn't work. I think I would do or say something very early on that would damage the relationship because I struggle with walking on egg shells. I misread your original post, I thought you asked which one you would rather date. I would rather date an arrogant man over a really insecure one any day - but would decide whether I kept dating him based on other criteria
InJest Posted October 27, 2011 Posted October 27, 2011 Women with low self esteem are such a drain, and are just annoying and boring to be around. I don't mind arrogant women so much, because I can generally block out a lot, especially if I know I'm going to get laid. Arrogant women are also typically a lot easier to manipulate. As for a long term partner, probably wouldn't go with either, but just dating, I'll take the arrogant one.
WhiteChocolate Posted October 27, 2011 Posted October 27, 2011 Arrogance for sure. I once posted on LS about a time when I was talking to two guys and I said that I would prefer a cocky man who thinks he's better than me than someone who I can step all over. It's just easier emotionally to deal with someone who is arrogant. You can get mad at him, yell and let off steam, argue, and not worry that he is going to get depressed and go hurt himself. Of course, my ideal is a humble, confident man. But if I was on a desert island with no alternatives, then arrogance wins.
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