perfectlyflawed459 Posted October 26, 2011 Posted October 26, 2011 I have been feeling better lately and it has only been a month of NC. However, not a day goes by where he doesn't cross my mind and I miss him to death. The past several nights I have been having dreams about him, but last night really hit me hard. I had one where it was a replay of our entire relationship. I relived all the happy memories we had together, and even saw how we started to fall apart at the very end. Then it jumped to a vision of us getting married and us looking happy again. I woke up from this and just started crying because this all broke my heart I would give anything to see him right now, I miss him bunches. However I doubt he is even thinking about me at all... I am sorry for the pointless post, I just kind of needed to let it out.
smudge21 Posted October 26, 2011 Posted October 26, 2011 Welcome to healing... it sucks and never seems to get any better, then one day, you realise that everything is okay and can't remember when exactly you did heal. You just know you remember the ex, but no longer feel that same emotional bond, so no longer feel bad about it all. Stay strong and remember you're not alone.
Author perfectlyflawed459 Posted October 26, 2011 Author Posted October 26, 2011 (edited) Yea I am remaining stong and continuing to move forward with my life. I am finding happiness within myself and learning to love and appreciate myself, be less insecure. I am keeping up NC for a really long time and letting him go because I know it is the right thing to do for both of us. I just hate it sometimes...I want him back in my life He was my best friend, and it hurts that the reality of things is that he probably doesn't even think about me and is super happy right now without me Edited October 26, 2011 by perfectlyflawed459
smudge21 Posted October 26, 2011 Posted October 26, 2011 Change the "he" for a "she" and you pretty much are using the same words I've used so many times. Miss her both as a friend and more, but there's nothing I can do. Accepting that it's over is the hardest thing in the world to do. It's like accepting defeat, that we lost something so special. Only once we've accepted that do we move on. It's like being able to give up all hope and I still have that 6 months after saying goodbye (NC was broken during that time, but by her not me). I wish I could be myself again, before I even met her. I know that time will come, one day.
fenderjames Posted October 26, 2011 Posted October 26, 2011 That wasn't pointless . Im new to this site but from many of these posts I get the feeling theres alot of good genuine ppl on here and they are here to vent themselves and help others . I think thats why this site is here . Go ahead and let it out . All the best.
Author perfectlyflawed459 Posted October 26, 2011 Author Posted October 26, 2011 I feel a little better now, I allowed myself to cry for a little bit, then looked outside and saw that it was a beautiful day. There is always a reason to smile, even in these hard times, and I already feel like I have come such a long way even just after a month of NC.
LovelyDaze Posted October 26, 2011 Posted October 26, 2011 I feel a little better now, I allowed myself to cry for a little bit, then looked outside and saw that it was a beautiful day. There is always a reason to smile, even in these hard times, and I already feel like I have come such a long way even just after a month of NC. You're doing great! You know that positive feeling you have? Remember that when you get an urge to contact your ex or start to reminisce about the good times you had. Any step back is a big one for dumpees. Do indeed allow yourself to mourn sometimes...I did it myself until I got to a place where I could 100% say to my heart and mind that I am over my ex. Keep pressing forward. You will thank yourself later
Author perfectlyflawed459 Posted October 26, 2011 Author Posted October 26, 2011 You're doing great! You know that positive feeling you have? Remember that when you get an urge to contact your ex or start to reminisce about the good times you had. Any step back is a big one for dumpees. Do indeed allow yourself to mourn sometimes...I did it myself until I got to a place where I could 100% say to my heart and mind that I am over my ex. Keep pressing forward. You will thank yourself later Thank you for your words of encouragement I promised myself I would remain NC with my ex for a very long time and I intend to keep it that way. I am at the point where the bad that happened between him and I is fading away, but the good still shines through strongly. I also feel like I am close to forgiving him and no longer holding a grudge either.
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