prsguitar Posted October 25, 2011 Posted October 25, 2011 Ill try to keep it short but odds are I wont. Essentially I have been talking to this girl for around a month. We have shared intimate details, believe in a lot of the same things about relationships (there purpose, views on cheating & sex, and so on and so forth). Well basically everything had been going great until she came down for the weekend. It all started out with this creep that was a friend of a friend hitting on her. I personally wasn't happy about it but took a deep breath and tried to calm down. We eventually left, went back and had a great night together, kissed everything and got along quite well. When we woke up the next morning I was lying next to her (there was a friend of mine passed out on the couch about 10 feet away) and I just made some half ass obnoxious comment along the lines of "what does a guy gotta do to get laid". Often times I have a weird sense of humor and in no way meant this to be insulting, deragatory or tried to belittle her. I highly respect her and we have discussed numerous times that we are waiting to have sex until the right perfect moment (if that even happens) and sometimes we get a little frisky, but all in all I have maintained an overall gentlemanly approach to it. I fully respect her body, and her wishes, and I pretty mch think we weren't ready for that anyway. We spend the next day together and everything is going great (at least in my eyes).... but all of a sudden after we are apart she just goes ice cold on me and said that comment destroyed our trust. I fully take responsiblity for making a stupid pig headed remark, and conveyed to her in every way possible that I am beyond sorry and wish I could take it back. In all honesty I didn't even mean it, it just was a stupid comment. But its just like I am trying to make it up to her and let her know how much i appreciate and respect her, and basically told her that I feel this is a mistake and I want a chance to build her trust back. I will not go in to the exact messages we were sending each other but basically she was speaking in non complete absolutes: Aka- I feel that I have lost my trust in you as opposed to "I have lost all trust in you". Anyway..... I have said my piece to her and just feel so bad about it all. Not for my sake but just the fact that I hurt her and I think she was excited as I was about where this could be going. I guess my questions are Is all pretty much lost? (and please feel free to berate how stupid my comment was I need to hear it) and also- Should I give her space and hope she cools down a bit? (this is what I am leaning towards, maybe follow up in a few days to a week and just try to get her to have a real conversation with me). I honestly think I hurt her more than anything and I am absolutely crazy about her, and know I can be a selfless loving compassionaite man she wants.
Trovador Posted October 26, 2011 Posted October 26, 2011 Yep, pretty bad comment but you had said your piece, it is up to her let this pass after some time. I said once to a girl that our thing "was an accident"... I meant it had been fate or luck or something arcane but she took it really bad, she even cried right away and sent me to hell... after some days she forgot the whole thing (they always do) but I was always sorry for not going away from her during that time, I mean who likes that kind of drama? On other note, I don't get how all of you got blasted that night, I don't think it is healthy to do that kind of stuff with the girl you might marry some day, but maybe I am a bit old fashioned... I mean, I don't see how she gets all dignified with your comment when she just got a blast with some guys... but as I say, I don't get it...
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