LoveBear22 Posted October 25, 2011 Posted October 25, 2011 (edited) Why do you think there is still such a stigma attached to communicating with others online about your feelings and "real life"? Obviously all/many of us are here to relieve some kind of dilemma or pain in our lives, and I think that for many, if people in our "real lives" knew we were on here we would be rather embarrassed (I certainly would, I wouldn't want people knowing how things have affected me emotionally). What do you think? EDIT: It may also be different for me, because I am a 21 year old college student in a fraternity and a fairly high social standing at my school... a lot of people would be pretty shocked that I am on here--not to be conceited or anything, this is the nature of the stigma and my reality. I like being connected to other people on the planet not through traditional social norms because I feel in many ways the real truth comes out when people have the "Anonymous" mask on. So many people are fake in what they say otherwise. Edited October 25, 2011 by LoveBear22
dasein Posted October 25, 2011 Posted October 25, 2011 Are you talking about posting in places like this or opening up emotionally to relative strangers who are dating prospects? The big disadvantage of lots of communicating by a man of the type you describe before the woman invests is that it turns a vast majority of women off and makes the man seem needy, insecure or plain not manly.
Author LoveBear22 Posted October 25, 2011 Author Posted October 25, 2011 Are you talking about posting in places like this or opening up emotionally to relative strangers who are dating prospects? The big disadvantage of lots of communicating by a man of the type you describe before the woman invests is that it turns a vast majority of women off and makes the man seem needy, insecure or plain not manly. I mean posting in places like this. i don't date online... not yet at least haha
dasein Posted October 25, 2011 Posted October 25, 2011 There's not any stigma about posting here, people your age in your social situation will give you crap about most anything regardless if there's any real stigma attached. When I was in your situation there was a "stigma" about dancing with women, making out with women in the middle of a party, not dancing with women, not making out with women in the middle of a party. Getting laid, not getting laid. Wearing boxers, wearing tighty whities. See the point? Any opportunity for giving someone hell was taken, rational or not. This is a great place to rant and say things that aren't PC in reaction to all the lies and BS the media bombards us with, that's what I use it for anyway.
Author LoveBear22 Posted October 25, 2011 Author Posted October 25, 2011 There's not any stigma about posting here, people your age in your social situation will give you crap about most anything regardless if there's any real stigma attached. When I was in your situation there was a "stigma" about dancing with women, making out with women in the middle of a party, not dancing with women, not making out with women in the middle of a party. Getting laid, not getting laid. Wearing boxers, wearing tighty whities. See the point? Any opportunity for giving someone hell was taken, rational or not. This is a great place to rant and say things that aren't PC in reaction to all the lies and BS the media bombards us with, that's what I use it for anyway. I don't disagree, I may be new but I entirely appreciate this forum. I think its great. It most definitely is that way for me now though, one of my friends caught me posting on here while he was playing a game in my room and sort of did a double take, wondering wtf i would be doing on a love forum haha Just asking, I do not question the validity and goodness of this place. Quite the contrary.
grkBoy Posted October 25, 2011 Posted October 25, 2011 I think the problem, especially for youth, is people are so insecure that they'll lunge and attack on any signs of weakness from others. One once asked why so many guys come on these boards to complain about dating, and I replied that they can't do it in the men's locker room. I've known that if you try to talk about these problems, other men will say things like "man up" or "deal with it" or "suck it up" or some kind of avoidance excuse. Some will also then ridicule the guy, claiming he's not a "real man" because he's failing with the women. Women have become just as vindictive too. Look how many will ridicule another woman who didn't get a man or keep a man. They'll attack one another on clothing, body size, etc. So people come on these boards because they an speak freely without persecution. Even here if you try to be mean, you'll get kicked out. LoveBear22, I think it's fine to speak your mind emotionally, but I would try to stay anonymous. We unfortunately live in an age where people like to hurt others before understanding them. Kind of sucks to see how unevolved society is.
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