Pohlkamp Posted October 24, 2011 Posted October 24, 2011 Hi all, I met a nice guy I had been chatting with online for the first time over on Sat. We had exchanged a few emails, then he suggested we meet. We hung out for a couple hours and had nice conversation. We ended it with the "we should do something again.. . ok, I'll email you ..yada," followed by a nice warm hug. The next day, I decided to send him a quick text that said I enjoyed meeting him. That was it. I figured if he's not interested he could ignore it, or text back something polite without asking me out again. He texted back 1/2 hr later and said he wasn't sure if I was interested so he was happy to hear from me. He asked if I wanted to do something this week. I texted back yes, and told him what days I was free, he texted back his schedule, and I said ok either of those days is good for me, so just let me know what you want to do. That was last night. He never responded to that last text. Does this sound like someone who is just not that into it? At first I thought he was just waiting to figure out when a good time would be for him, but it's now been about 24 hrs and I'm thinking maybe he changed his mind. No idea why he would say he wants to do something again if he really didn't want to. There was no pressure to ask. I'm not texting him again, he knows how to find me, but I'm slightly confused. Thoughts?
El Brujo Posted October 24, 2011 Posted October 24, 2011 Texting might be a terrible way to communicate, but unfortunately 2-way micro TVs are not available yet, and anyhow texting is better than the silent treatment.
Fondue Posted October 24, 2011 Posted October 24, 2011 You just said it yourself that texting is an awful way of communicating, yet you made no effort to communicate with him by other means? I'm perplexed.
Author Pohlkamp Posted October 24, 2011 Author Posted October 24, 2011 What specifically are you perplexed about? It would be difficult to assert that I answered my own question, because I clearly did not.
whichwayisup Posted October 24, 2011 Posted October 24, 2011 Meaning, you texted him the next day. Why not call instead? Yes, people rely on email and texts way too much. Bottomline is, if you do end up on another date with this guy, tell him straight up that when arrangements are to be made, it would be better to talk on the phone rather than text.
Lucky_One Posted October 24, 2011 Posted October 24, 2011 I don't think it's all that long, considering you have only had one date. Next time, text him and ask "Hey can I give you a call or are you busy?"
Author Pohlkamp Posted October 24, 2011 Author Posted October 24, 2011 Perhaps it's not obvious, but there are other considerations at play other than absolute clear communication. I'm not chasing him. I don't call guys after a first date and ask them out. But I did want to let him know precisely what I said in my text. That being, that I enjoyed meeting him. It's not clear to me what the point of talking about whether I should or shouldn't have texted prior to this would be. I'm just not sure what to do *now*, because I'm not sure how to read his invite followed by silence.
Author Pohlkamp Posted October 24, 2011 Author Posted October 24, 2011 I don't think it's all that long, considering you have only had one date. QUOTE] Yeah, you are probably right. Just feeling like I'm getting the blow-off, but who knows? I sure don't.
spiderowl Posted October 24, 2011 Posted October 24, 2011 I'm sure you'll have checked that your text is registered in your sentmail box. If it isn't, it's possible your phone let you down and didn't sent it. If it is, then I'd leave it and resist the temptation to text again. You had to contact him first after the date and he responded. I think it's up to him now. Even if he didn't get your last text, he could contact you to follow up as you showed clear interest. I know not every text reaches its target but I would bet that 95% do.
norajane Posted October 24, 2011 Posted October 24, 2011 You told him: I said ok either of those days is good for me, so just let me know what you want to do. That was pretty open-ended, and nothing in your message said "tell me right now". So, I'm sure he will let you know what he wants to do when he figures it out. Next time, plan the next date at the end of the first. If he doesn't bring it up, you should say, "hey, this was fun. let's do it again." He will take it from there.
norajane Posted October 24, 2011 Posted October 24, 2011 I'm just not sure what to do *now*, because I'm not sure how to read his invite followed by silence. You do nothing! You told him to "let you know". It's up to him to let you know.
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