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Why do you want a relationship?


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Posted

Reflecting on many threads here the question occured to me. Why do people want relationships soo bad?

 

Understandably people get lonely but at the same time isn't is sort of sassackwards to want a relationship before even meeting someone relationship worthy? :confused:

 

 

Shouldn't meeting someone worth while come way before wanting a relationship?

Posted

i just want casual relationships that include sexual activity

Posted

Because I want to experience what it's like?

 

I guess I'm not ready for one right now. I was, a year ago, but I'm not ready now.

 

But still, I can't help but wonder what love is really like. Sounds kind of stupid, huh?

Posted
But still, I can't help but wonder what love is really like.

it's over-rated, trust me

Posted
it's over-rated, trust me

 

Me being the hopeless romantic dude, what makes it so over-rated?

Posted
Me being the hopeless romantic dude, what makes it so over-rated?

 

Innocence.

Posted

Please elaborate.

Posted
Me being the hopeless romantic dude, what makes it so over-rated?

true love is incredible pleasure wrapped in intense pain

Posted

Wanting a relationship is a precursor to meeting someone worthwhile. If I'm not looking for a new vehicle, I won't be paying attention when I drive by the car dealerships.

 

I can't answer why everyone would want a relationship so bad. Maybe it's cause they're shiny and who doesn't like shiny things?

 

As for me I know why I crave a relationship:

 

Companionship

Affection

Mutual Goals

Having someone to come home to everyday

Added stability

Someone (hopefully intelligent) to talk to

Intimacy

Learning about and exploring another person

Solves some lonliness

Cold bed in the winter sucks

 

And lets face it, humans have that desire to seek out a member of their preferred sex as a partner. Most do, anyway. Some are totally okay being alone, which is fine.

Posted
true love is incredible pleasure wrapped in intense pain

 

I'd take the incredible pleasure, even if it meant the pain.

Posted
I'd take the incredible pleasure, even if it meant the pain.

love is always bittersweet

Posted
Why do people want relationships soo bad?

 

 

The first life on Earth was self replicating, around 4 billion years ago. The offspring would be almost exactly like the parent, and would only change very slowly over generations due to genetic drift.

But then, some cells started sharing DNA with each other, so as to create variation in their offspring. Some would be stronger, some weaker than their parents. The strong survived, and passed on their DNA, creating improvements at a faster pace than the simple self replicating cells. This evolved into a genetic predisposition to want to share DNA (have sex), which we still have today.

  • Author
Posted
true love is incredible pleasure wrapped in intense pain

 

Quoted for truth. The most romantic sentiment...from the most unromantic poster. Oh the Irony. :)

 

For me:

 

My life consist of taking care of my family and marshalling it's limited resources to keep a roof over our collective heads. Being a unpaid live in care giver for my 70 year old legally blind father. Watching as my mothers memory goes bit by bit. Then trying to complete a second thesis because...well an advisor of mine said something that caused him to not be promoted to dean. (I can't say any more about that.)

 

Part of me thinks a good relationship could be a bright and hopeful spot in an otherwise dull, depressing, and at best boring life of endless drudgery. Some concrete hope in anotherwise dreary future. :_( (for real.)

 

@max noob

 

For most of us here sex is easily found at a local bar or pub on any given friday, saturday or sunday night if we throw all standards and inhibitions out the window. Relationship =/= sex. Sex is only a TINY part of the equation.

Posted

Just realized I never really answered the question.

 

Why I want a relationship:

Having a companion

Opening myself up to someone

Sex... regular sex... and too much sex

Sharing interests

Doing things that I wouldn't normally do by myself -- this includes going ice skating, etc...

 

Oh, and also it'll help me take my mind of my ex when I meet that someone who can actually do this.

Posted
true love is incredible pleasure wrapped in intense pain

 

No, it really isn't. Not when it is mutual, anyway.

Posted

Some people like punishment.

 

Just kidding.

Posted

@max noob

 

For most of us here sex is easily found at a local bar or pub on any given friday, saturday or sunday night if we throw all standards and inhibitions out the window. Relationship =/= sex. Sex is only a TINY part of the equation.

 

OK, so why do we want long term relationships?

When we evolved from reptiles around 200 million years ago, we started to care for our young, which gave them a better chance of survival. But it also meant that our kids became more dependent on us; we couldn't just lay an egg and walk off anymore. Couples that stayed together had a better chance of making sure their kids survived. Hence, a genetic predisposition to want to stick together, have companionship, and to feel heartbroken when we lose our significant other.

Posted
No, it really isn't. Not when it is mutual, anyway.

how old are you? 22?

Posted

Using the tv show "The Amazing Race" as a metaphor for life, I want someone who I can tackle the challenges of life with, as nothing brings two people closer together than facing and overcoming adversity...someone I can learn new things from and someone I can teach new things to...someone to help me when I'm feeling down or lost in the world and someone who I can help...basically someone to expand both the breadth and depth of my life...and sex is good too...

 

And having someone I can win The Amazing Race with is exactly my kinda girl...

  • Author
Posted
No, it really isn't. Not when it is mutual, anyway.

 

Live longer and you will know that true love means making personal sacrifices for that other person, and them making sacrifices for you. This is along with all the other good happy fluffy stuff. :)

Posted
how old are you? 22?

 

Been married nearly 20 years. Yet to experience the intense pain of love. I don't know what the future holds, of course!

Posted
Live longer and you will know that true love means making personal sacrifices for that other person, and them making sacrifices for you. This is along with all the other good happy fluffy stuff. :)

 

I'm almost 40 :laugh:, but I agree with what you've said here. Mutual sacrifices get easier and easier over the years, as the "love capital" builds. The opposite happens, of course, if the love capital gets depleted.

  • Author
Posted

XXOO

 

Consider yourself lucky.

 

I love my parents. They are old to the point of needing assisted living. Seeing them like that hurts.

 

I hope no one you love is ever in that kind of position.

Posted
XXOO

 

Consider yourself lucky.

 

I love my parents. They are old to the point of needing assisted living. Seeing them like that hurts.

 

I hope no one you love is ever in that kind of position.

 

I'm sorry about your parents. I do practice gratitude, every single day.

 

I've watched my own loved ones age and struggle with illness. Never take a day for granted.

  • Author
Posted

I guess that goes to what alphamale was talking about.

 

Do you really know you love someone until you have, at least metaphorically, held their hair while they vomit due to a horrible flu....that you are likely to catch because you nursed them to health?

 

It's never all good, yet we still want a RLship.

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