Buttercup84 Posted October 23, 2011 Posted October 23, 2011 So let's not sugarcoat it , dumpers are relieved that it is over . Might be a little sad , but they are happier . They will be excited about being single , maybe they already met someone . But what if single life isn't that great afterall ? things might go wrong - they get dumped , go on dates but don't get lucky , have money issues etc. Even if they no longer love us , they miss the comfort of the relationship. It is safe , familiar and they know we still have feelings for them . They are wanted . I am not saying it happens all the time but it makes me wonder , do some ex's ever try to come back purely because things are not working out the way they wanted it to ? I do not want my ex back , I am not expecting him to contact me either but has this ever happened to anyone ?
immitable Posted October 23, 2011 Posted October 23, 2011 I was a dumper before and came back because of the reasons you mentioned, so imo I think it happens.
Surfer Girl Posted October 23, 2011 Posted October 23, 2011 If there is history... I beleive there comes a time the dumper will remember certain times of the year... they may move on... but those thoughts will never disapear... triggers to certain times of the year will not erase the memories...
aerogurl87 Posted October 23, 2011 Posted October 23, 2011 I went back to my boyfriend for those reasons, and I'll admit it. I went back cause I was afraid of the unknown and being with him was like a safety net. Now I'm more miserable than I was before.
mike588 Posted October 23, 2011 Posted October 23, 2011 Does this also apply to when your ex. leaves you for an ex. and things were not like they though it would be?
Sugarkane Posted October 23, 2011 Posted October 23, 2011 I've only ever had one ex contact me. He said all the right things, he made a mistake etc. He thought I'd still be waiting for him. He promised things would be different "this time". Well it turns out he hadn't changed at all. When I didn't change my plans because he wanted to get laid, he cracked it. Even though he broke NC, he called me a nutjob and glad that he dumped me. I'm so glad I didn't go over there to get used for sex. I never want to see this fit ever again.
Sugarkane Posted October 23, 2011 Posted October 23, 2011 I knew if I went over there he would make some excuse to leave after he got what he wanted. I wasn't going to fall for his BS again. He made me feel like a cheap whore last time.
thebig-guy Posted October 23, 2011 Posted October 23, 2011 My first girlfriend cheated. then was happy being single for 2 months. then she pleaded to get me back at which point i was completely over her. Was very very satisfying considering i begged my heart out when we first split up. This time however its different. Ive just been dumped. And although i dont think ive been cheated on. my ex has definitely found someone else to take her mind off me. Also shes back home in a week from working abroad and will be single again. As evil as it sounds, i hope to god she comes crawling back in a few months so i can tell her where to go! Overall I think its harder for the DumpER to recover quicker in a sense, than their ex. Obviously if you have no control over the breakup you have to accept the fact youve been dumped pretty quick so you can move on with your life. The DumpER however could think months down the line... "did i make a mistake?" and then come crawling back because they still think they have control over their ex.
mike588 Posted October 23, 2011 Posted October 23, 2011 My first girlfriend cheated. then was happy being single for 2 months. then she pleaded to get me back at which point i was completely over her. Was very very satisfying considering i begged my heart out when we first split up. This time however its different. Ive just been dumped. And although i dont think ive been cheated on. my ex has definitely found someone else to take her mind off me. Also shes back home in a week from working abroad and will be single again. As evil as it sounds, i hope to god she comes crawling back in a few months so i can tell her where to go! Overall I think its harder for the DumpER to recover quicker in a sense, than their ex. Obviously if you have no control over the breakup you have to accept the fact youve been dumped pretty quick so you can move on with your life. The DumpER however could think months down the line... "did i make a mistake?" and then come crawling back because they still think they have control over their ex. Good point,,, I'm still waiting for my ex to come back so I can also tell her where to go! Hopefully in a few more months she will realise she made a mistake. Time will tell.
ChelseaLS Posted October 23, 2011 Posted October 23, 2011 Mike she may realize she made a mistake but unfortunately may not have the guts to admit it.
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