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Posted

Paperwork landed on the mat this morning, I just have to sign one piece of paper and I am officially divorced.

It's a very strange feeling and I'm currently riding a rolller coaster of emotions, from deep despair to quietly optimistic.

I'm scared of the future and I know that I have to be a strong role model for my youngest daughter but the job hunt is hard and frustrating.

I know that life is what you make it but I kinda feel that I'm caught in the wrong life and I would quite like the other one back please.:sick:

I expected to move on quickly but I feel that I've regressed, despite having a new male friend.

To any divorcees out there- does this feeling get better and how long does it take!:(

Posted

I thought you had a job. How old are you?

I, too, had to go find a job after being a SAHM for a few years, and getting rejected over and over again by potential employers after having gone through an emotionally draining D from a cheater was more than I could handle at that time. I was almost 40 and ageism is big in the corporate world.

I did manage to find a job after a loong time of searching, but the financial disaster is still something I'm struggling with, in addition to being a single parent, which I definitely never wanted to be. I'm more than a year out now, but I'm STILL feeling lonely, overwhelmed and sad. It's not getting better yet. But I'm telling myself day after day after day that I'm a fighter and I can do it. I'm thinking a lot of negative thoughts, though, such as "Why do I have to pick up the pieces of the mess that someone else has created?"

 

Hang in there. We are strong women.

Posted

Worly

 

My story is different, after catching her with the OM I gave up on our marriage. About a month later she decided she wanted to reconcile, I never entertained the idea, she then pursued me for the next 3 plus years, which annoyed me, so when I got a new job and place to live I disappeared.

 

She wanted me to file, I did not see a need to waste hundreds of dollars on a piece of paper, as in my mind we where thru the second that I saw her with the OM, and besides we did not have any kids or large assets to split.

 

Eight years later, I move back to my home state. Where my mom presented me with a copy of my divorce. My mom being a legal expert had decided to track down my marriage status and had gotten a copy.

 

I truthfully had not thought of my Ex in years, so I was more than surprised to find that seeing the copy of my divorce decree which had taken place a good seven years previous, actually threw me into some sort of wierd funk. It was like this big hole opened up in the middle of my life that and a whole bunch of negativity swept into my life. I didn't miss her, but at the same time, I was left to wonder why wasn't I good enough to be marriage material.

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Posted

I had been covering maternity leaves and both times the class teacher came back. I have applied for jobs and had interviews but the younger, less expensive candidates seem to be appointed.

I am 53- have looked into other work but there is nothing available, even retail is cutting posts.

I won't give up and have accepted that I will probably have to move-again- so that I have a better chance of employment.

i accept that this is just how it has to be but do feel resentful that my life(and my daughter's) has changed so dramatically.

Hit a new low when daughter's Headteacher told me that there was financial help available for my daughter's 3 day school trip- although grateful I am mortified that we are in this position,especially as XH is funding OW's daughter for ballet,school clothes etc.:mad:

Once the divorce was absolute I thought that things would improve but I seem to be stuck.:sick:

Outwardly I appear positive and upbeat but I am scared that things won't get better.:(

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