lastrayden Posted October 21, 2011 Posted October 21, 2011 I know im in divorce/separation. As of right now my W and i are separated but i think it is soon going to be divorce. My wife has told me how miserable she is with me, she is depressed when she is around me and she is just plain unhappy. Yeah ok. Anyways i know that is all from this fog. I had got back home from work and a friend was telling me that she was texting him today. She was trying to find some kind of information out. She told him that she absolutley does not want to be married to me anymore. Is that part of the fog or is she really serious about something like that in the state of mind she is in. She said she wanted to wait until next year and i said that was fine in hopes of trying to save this thing. But if that is really what she wants than at this point with everything that i have found and heard i really have no problem with going and filing ASAP. I think i would demolish her in the courts and she has no clue. The OM is still married and im worried for her cause yes i do still love her. I think OM is telling her the usual stuff. Him leaving his wife and being with her forever and so on. He hasnt even filed yet. Any advice or answers would be appreciated.
GorillaTheater Posted October 21, 2011 Posted October 21, 2011 Any advice or answers would be appreciated. 1. You can't fight through her fog, so don't even try. 2. Let her go. "Wife, I've decided you're right, this marriage isn't going to work. I deserve to be with a woman who wants to be with me. There's thousands of women around here and just one of me, and I like those odds just fine. I'll contact a lawyer so we can begin this process as gracefully as possible." 3. Tell the OM's wife what's going on. Best of luck, man.
Author lastrayden Posted October 21, 2011 Author Posted October 21, 2011 I have already told her. Im just tired of this s**t. This guys a douche and she is an idiot. But i dont think im going to tell her that i am filing. She will find out when she recieves the papers.
hopesndreams Posted October 22, 2011 Posted October 22, 2011 She will keep you hanging on and on friendly terms if you let her. Giving her what she wants shows you to be needy and not worthy of her respect. No respect=no love. She has shown you what she is made of. Garbage. Toss her to the curb. Don't sit on this and hope for the best. Any time you give her gives her chance to set herself up with the OM.
whichwayisup Posted October 22, 2011 Posted October 22, 2011 I know im in divorce/separation. As of right now my W and i are separated but i think it is soon going to be divorce. My wife has told me how miserable she is with me, she is depressed when she is around me and she is just plain unhappy. Yeah ok. Anyways i know that is all from this fog. I had got back home from work and a friend was telling me that she was texting him today. She was trying to find some kind of information out. She told him that she absolutley does not want to be married to me anymore. Is that part of the fog or is she really serious about something like that in the state of mind she is in. She said she wanted to wait until next year and i said that was fine in hopes of trying to save this thing. But if that is really what she wants than at this point with everything that i have found and heard i really have no problem with going and filing ASAP. I think i would demolish her in the courts and she has no clue. The OM is still married and im worried for her cause yes i do still love her. I think OM is telling her the usual stuff. Him leaving his wife and being with her forever and so on. He hasnt even filed yet. Any advice or answers would be appreciated. If she really is that unhappy and wants out, then she will do something, get off her butt, speak to a lawyer and start making arrangements. This sh.it now about her waiting a year is total crap! She is waitin to see what the OM does, meaning she isn't going to leave you if he isn't leaving his wife. Screw that. I say, tell her to move out if she is that miserable with you. YES, she is in a fog and she's re written history, made stuff up and is justifying her behaviour. I know you love her but right now that woman is NOT the woman you married. She's selfish, cruel and putting her needs first above everybody else's. There is no marriage worth saving if she isn't interested in tryng to reconnect with you, let alone still having the affair. Sorry that you're going through this.
Author lastrayden Posted October 22, 2011 Author Posted October 22, 2011 Thats exactly what i think she is doing. Im just a security thing WHEN it doesnt work out. She is already out of the house and lives with her mom. I was thinking about something though. I am from arizona. All my family lives there. I desperetly want to go back home after all of this. We have three little girls that my family has seen twice. Anyways i was thinking if she did want to come back the first thing i would tell her is we are moving to arizona. Once there and have residence i could care less what she does. It seems even if i tried to get full custody i wouldnt be able to go back home. I have alot of stuff showing about the affair but none of that matters in child custody does it. Im just ready to go back home with my little girls.
robf1971 Posted October 22, 2011 Posted October 22, 2011 Thats exactly what i think she is doing. Im just a security thing WHEN it doesnt work out. She is already out of the house and lives with her mom. I was thinking about something though. I am from arizona. All my family lives there. I desperetly want to go back home after all of this. We have three little girls that my family has seen twice. Anyways i was thinking if she did want to come back the first thing i would tell her is we are moving to arizona. Once there and have residence i could care less what she does. It seems even if i tried to get full custody i wouldnt be able to go back home. I have alot of stuff showing about the affair but none of that matters in child custody does it. Im just ready to go back home with my little girls. Just make sure you get 50/50 custody. Your wife may be a cheating sk*nk but she is their mother and deserves the same rights as you. I wouldn't even bother telling her you filed for divorce, in these situations actions are what counts, just do it and have her served.
hopesndreams Posted October 22, 2011 Posted October 22, 2011 Thats exactly what i think she is doing. Im just a security thing WHEN it doesnt work out. She is already out of the house and lives with her mom. I was thinking about something though. I am from arizona. All my family lives there. I desperetly want to go back home after all of this. We have three little girls that my family has seen twice. Anyways i was thinking if she did want to come back the first thing i would tell her is we are moving to arizona. Once there and have residence i could care less what she does. It seems even if i tried to get full custody i wouldnt be able to go back home. I have alot of stuff showing about the affair but none of that matters in child custody does it. Im just ready to go back home with my little girls. Those in affairs are completely selfish. It's all about them. The last thing on her mind are her children. Many walk away from their spouse AND children. She might just send you and the little girls off to Arizona with a wave and a smile. Is she living at moms with the children or do you have them?
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