is she really to busy?

[eweezzee]

ok i have a situation that im interested in your opinions. I just turned 26, have been single since april, usually in a long term relationship. With work i do not go out to bars and clubs like i used to so i joined match. Im a good looking guy very confident and since joining in may ive gone out on probably 15-20 dates. None of which i had real chemistry with or that "feeling". I hooked up with alot of them on 3rd or 4th dates to see if there was anything there and have been friends with them for months becuase i know stuff happens overtime, Obviously i would never view someone that is willing to give it up that quickly with me a long term partner, i want to work for sex and "earn it". Ok so i finally felt that spark on the last date. It was the first time we met, we have been talking for about a week before we met up, my bday was the day before so she wrote on my facebook wall and also texted me happy bday. So we met up next day, very very low key no pressure, we met up for a slice of pizza. We ended up there for about 2 hours, then we continued the convo in her car. She was supposed to meet up with her friends at a bar and asked if i wanted to go with her, i said sure i figured good sign, introducing to the friends. After going back and forth with them they decided not to go out but she was going to her one gf's house so we went our seperate ways. She told me she was having a really good time and thats without me saying anything first. Kiss on the cheek only, i did not attempt anything. Next day i was really like wow i had that feeling again that i really wanted to get to know her and i know she was not out of my league by any means. We texted that day, im going away this weekend so i told her i really wanted to see her again before i left even if its just for alittle bit. BTW her schedule consists of nursing school 5 days a week and work 6 which is obviously why shes on match. I said only if you want to see me again making sure she wanted to and she said she did. We had plans for thursday just to meet up after her class for alittle bit. Monday we did not talk, tuesday i ended up texted her again, very minimal convo, Wednesday no text from either of us, so thursday comes we are supposed to meet up at nite and i text her saying whats up, she doesnt text me ever like before we met up although when i text her she does give me full answers and has a convo. She then says that she is even busier then she thought with school and work and told me she would not be giving me all of her and it would not be fair to me, i told her i was just looking to get to know her for now so i didnt care if we hungout once a week or even every other week. Out of respect i told her we could skip hanging out and that id leaver her alone. She told me she wasnt looking for me to leave her alone but she has worked to hard on the nursing stuff to i guess give her attention else where. Guys dont write on here facebook and she did not renew the match.com free trial. Do you think she really just is that busy or did i get the run around? im not looking for advice on what to do, im not going to text her and let her come to me. Sorry for the long essay but i felt you should know all the details before commenting.

 

Thanks,

 

E

[vsmini]

She sounds like she is genuinely busy and she is making school and work her priorities which is OK.

 

I don't think you are getting the run around but I think it was good that she was straight with you so you know now rather than later.

[eweezzee]

She sounds like she is genuinely busy and she is making school and work her priorities which is OK.

 

I don't think you are getting the run around but I think it was good that she was straight with you so you know now rather than later.

 

Vsmini, appreciate the words,

 

Thanks,

 

E

[azsinglegal]

Tough to say, but I agree if she didn't renew the trail she's probably just too busy. I was on match for a bit and didn't renew after a month either. I was working 7 days a week 12-14 hr days and just didn't have time for someone.

 

I had met a few nice guys but they took 2nd place to my job, the gym and my dogs so I felt bad I couldn't commit to getting to know them more. It was a good idea when I signed up but I couldn't commit.

 

Giver her space. When I had time, I went back and tried to contact the guys I really liked from there.

 

I'd just keep dating others.

[eweezzee]

Tough to say, but I agree if she didn't renew the trail she's probably just too busy. I was on match for a bit and didn't renew after a month either. I was working 7 days a week 12-14 hr days and just didn't have time for someone.

 

I had met a few nice guys but they took 2nd place to my job, the gym and my dogs so I felt bad I couldn't commit to getting to know them more. It was a good idea when I signed up but I couldn't commit.

 

Giver her space. When I had time, I went back and tried to contact the guys I really liked from there.

 

I'd just keep dating others.

 

Azsinglegal, Thanks for the advice. I feel like she might be in the same boat that you were in, thought she had more time for dating then she had. She told me i was actually the only guy she answered and hungout with, like you said though ill give her space and see what happens. She did tell me she didnt want me to completley leave her alone, should i check up in a week from now see what shes up to for the weekend or no contact and see if she contacts me.

 

Thanks,

 

E

[azsinglegal]

Azsinglegal, Thanks for the advice. I feel like she might be in the same boat that you were in, thought she had more time for dating then she had. She told me i was actually the only guy she answered and hungout with, like you said though ill give her space and see what happens. She did tell me she didnt want me to completley leave her alone, should i check up in a week from now see what shes up to for the weekend or no contact and see if she contacts me.

 

Thanks,

 

E

 

Why not? I only met 2 people from match when I was on it as it's all I had time for too! We went to dinner but then I didn't have time to invest in someone.

 

Just don't go overboard, ya know? I'd ask her when her next day off is if she wants to do something or just lie around and watch movies and talk.

 

Every woman is different, but I like the "have a great day" or "go get'em today" text - something where I can respond if I want to, but not an obligation to like a question.

[Imajerk17]

ok i have a situation that im interested in your opinions. I just turned 26, have been single since april, usually in a long term relationship. With work i do not go out to bars and clubs like i used to so i joined match. Im a good looking guy very confident and since joining in may ive gone out on probably 15-20 dates. None of which i had real chemistry with or that "feeling". I hooked up with alot of them on 3rd or 4th dates to see if there was anything there and have been friends with them for months becuase i know stuff happens overtime, Obviously i would never view someone that is willing to give it up that quickly with me a long term partner, i want to work for sex and "earn it".

 

Ok so i finally felt that spark on the last date. It was the first time we met, we have been talking for about a week before we met up, my bday was the day before so she wrote on my facebook wall and also texted me happy bday. So we met up next day, very very low key no pressure, we met up for a slice of pizza. We ended up there for about 2 hours, then we continued the convo in her car. She was supposed to meet up with her friends at a bar and asked if i wanted to go with her, i said sure i figured good sign, introducing to the friends. After going back and forth with them they decided not to go out but she was going to her one gf's house so we went our seperate ways. She told me she was having a really good time and thats without me saying anything first. Kiss on the cheek only, i did not attempt anything.

 

Next day i was really like wow i had that feeling again that i really wanted to get to know her and i know she was not out of my league by any means. We texted that day, im going away this weekend so i told her i really wanted to see her again before i left even if its just for alittle bit. BTW her schedule consists of nursing school 5 days a week and work 6 which is obviously why shes on match. I said only if you want to see me again making sure she wanted to and she said she did.

 

We had plans for thursday just to meet up after her class for alittle bit. Monday we did not talk, tuesday i ended up texted her again, very minimal convo, Wednesday no text from either of us, so thursday comes we are supposed to meet up at nite and i text her saying whats up, she doesnt text me ever like before we met up although when i text her she does give me full answers and has a convo. She then says that she is even busier then she thought with school and work and told me she would not be giving me all of her and it would not be fair to me,

 

i told her i was just looking to get to know her for now so i didnt care if we hungout once a week or even every other week. Out of respect i told her we could skip hanging out and that id leaver her alone. She told me she wasnt looking for me to leave her alone but she has worked to hard on the nursing stuff to i guess give her attention else where. Guys dont write on here facebook and she did not renew the match.com free trial. Do you think she really just is that busy or did i get the run around? im not looking for advice on what to do, im not going to text her and let her come to me. Sorry for the long essay but i felt you should know all the details before commenting.

 

Thanks,

 

E

 

I quoted what you wrote, and I bolded what stood out for me. Stop asking a girl for reassurance like that! You may think you're being respectful but all you are doing is showing low confidence.

 

You also noticed that I added some line breaks and spaces. One huge block of text is hard to read. Paragraphs are your friend!

[thatone]

yeah i know the feeling, the ones who haven't been dating all this time and have been working and going to school instead seem like the normal ones at first. and to an extent they are.

 

but ask yourself if you really want to be waiting around for her to do everything else she has planned while you're the last in line.

[SingleinSouth]

I don't know what year she is in at nursing school but I am in my second year. The first year was close to impossible! I had to keep cutting my work hours to keep up. I am now in my second and last year and graduate in May and it's still high pressure because I sure don't want to mess up after all this investment! I believe she is genuine. I would date others but keep contact with her but it's still a long haul for her. She has to pass her boards and then interview and find a job. Is she a CNA now? BIG pay difference! She will want to get RN employment asap after graduation. This stuff will be her main priority for awhile.:/

[vsmini]

Azsinglegal, Thanks for the advice. I feel like she might be in the same boat that you were in, thought she had more time for dating then she had. She told me i was actually the only guy she answered and hungout with, like you said though ill give her space and see what happens. She did tell me she didnt want me to completley leave her alone, should i check up in a week from now see what shes up to for the weekend or no contact and see if she contacts me.

 

Thanks,

 

E

 

To be honest you've initiated plenty and she's told you how busy she is. I think it's best to let her contact you because then you'll know 100% that she's actually willing and wanting to make plans and go out with you.

[eweezzee]

I quoted what you wrote, and I bolded what stood out for me. Stop asking a girl for reassurance like that! You may think you're being respectful but all you are doing is showing low confidence.

 

You also noticed that I added some line breaks and spaces. One huge block of text is hard to read. Paragraphs are your friend!

 

 

Imajerk17, thanks for the response. I dont know if i can agree completly with the low confidence thing, im a very confident guy so i dont see it abnormal to ask if she was interested in seeing me again, i actually said it to her jokingly. To just assume it, is alittle arogant and also i felt it right to cancel our plans until she was 100 percent ready to hangout. It will look better in the long run in my opinion.

[eweezzee]

I don't know what year she is in at nursing school but I am in my second year. The first year was close to impossible! I had to keep cutting my work hours to keep up. I am now in my second and last year and graduate in May and it's still high pressure because I sure don't want to mess up after all this investment! I believe she is genuine. I would date others but keep contact with her but it's still a long haul for her. She has to pass her boards and then interview and find a job. Is she a CNA now? BIG pay difference! She will want to get RN employment asap after graduation. This stuff will be her main priority for awhile.:/

 

 

Singleinsouth, thank you for the advice, im not sure her status but agree after talking to her it will be like this for a while.

 

Thanks,

 

E

[eweezzee]

To be honest you've initiated plenty and she's told you how busy she is. I think it's best to let her contact you because then you'll know 100% that she's actually willing and wanting to make plans and go out with you.

 

 

To be honest, only reason why i mite text her in about a week is i deleted my facbook yesterday because i am interviewing, if she goes on her facebook since i am the last comment she mite think i deleted her or blocked her after our talk and doubt she would text me even if she was ready to hangout.

[vsmini]

To be honest, only reason why i mite text her in about a week is i deleted my facbook yesterday because i am interviewing, if she goes on her facebook since i am the last comment she mite think i deleted her or blocked her after our talk and doubt she would text me even if she was ready to hangout.

 

This might sound harsh being that I'm typing this out online but know that my tone is not as bitchy as it probably sounds. It sounds like you're being one of those people who is already planning on making excuses for why she might not call. Have you ever seen that movie He's just not that into you? Where the main character keeps thinking that if she doesn't answer the phone or doesn't respond to an email in a timely manner then the guy will get the wrong idea and never call again.

 

It's really not like that. The same thing applies to both genders - if they want to call...they will call. If they want to hang out....they will find a way to try to make it happen.

 

She knows your number and if she really is interested then she'll text to clarify facebook issues or anything else.

 

Why do you doubt she would contact you if she wanted to hang out? Most people that are into someone don't have a problem contacting them to get together.

[eweezzee]

This might sound harsh being that I'm typing this out online but know that my tone is not as bitchy as it probably sounds. It sounds like you're being one of those people who is already planning on making excuses for why she might not call. Have you ever seen that movie He's just not that into you? Where the main character keeps thinking that if she doesn't answer the phone or doesn't respond to an email in a timely manner then the guy will get the wrong idea and never call again.

 

It's really not like that. The same thing applies to both genders - if they want to call...they will call. If they want to hang out....they will find a way to try to make it happen.

 

She knows your number and if she really is interested then she'll text to clarify facebook issues or anything else.

 

Why do you doubt she would contact you if she wanted to hang out? Most people that are into someone don't have a problem contacting them to get together.

 

 

I did see the movie and i understand how your putting it, im def not taking it the wrong way. However if i went facebook and thought a girl deleted or blocked me especially a day after saying i didnt have time for her, i prob wouldnt contact her because i would assume shes pissed at me and i would think she did it on purpose. It is a valid point