amandap Posted October 20, 2011 Posted October 20, 2011 This is so hard, ive aready posted my breakup, well its been over 3 months now since my ex dumped me we were living together 10 years, it was a big row and he left, anyway my ex is still phoning me every week and i was to weak to stop contact, he told me he still loved me, the first time we spoke i saidi have something of your what shall a do with them, he said of just chuck them away, as time has gone on we did meet once but i didnt mention the relationship, i know he thinks i will keep waiting for him, but tuesday i felt different, he came over to pick something up i didnt invite him in, i was just polite, i gave him what he had come for then said take care and walked back inside, this is the first time i didnt stand there and wave as he turned the corner on his motorbike, i looked through the window and i could see he was waving, thinking i would be standing there like i have always done, he looked back and saw i wasnt there, the next day i txted him and told him i have come across his motorbike jacket, does he want me to chuck it or what, well he txted back asking if i could keep hold of it for him with no mention when he will collect it, i am going to go completely NC i have had enough of being a fool, waiting for him to ring, he has broke my heart after all those years, all our plans have gone but he still wants me in his life, even when i said i cant do this meaning being friends because it wont allow me to move on, he even then was trying to convince me we need to stay intouch, i now think this is just for him, being selfish, having me in the background as a comfort and maybe even a backup, i am not going to play his silly game anymore, im going to tell him on saturday that he has made his choice and i dont want anymore contact
TheDovic Posted October 20, 2011 Posted October 20, 2011 Good for you Amanda. I wish I had your strength. This really sucks doesn't it?
Author amandap Posted October 21, 2011 Author Posted October 21, 2011 Dovic it is true what you said it sucks, i just hope im strong enough to keep to the NC, i dont really know why he still wants me in his life to be honest, when he rang me the last time it wasnt on his usual saturday, it was 2 days earlier, so i was trying to be strong and said oh you wont need to call now on saturday as you rang today but guess what he rang on the friday and saturday, when he rings if i say oh i will let you go now, he says dont you want to talk to me, i really dont know what he's playing at, he keeps asking if i need anything etc, as soon as i back away he does seem keener, but the minute i show an interest in what we had he goes cool on me, my family say he is acting very confused, but i have given it over 3 months now, i cant sit here with a broken heart hoping he will come to his sense's, it hurts to much, i am going to try my best to tell him on saturday that i cant be friends after loving him for 10 years, i hope i can really do it, Dovic are you still in contact with your ex
TheDovic Posted October 21, 2011 Posted October 21, 2011 Amanda my ex seems exactly like yours! She keeps contacting me, flirting, crying, trying to do things for me and as soon as I take a step forward she backs away!!! So frustrating
TheDovic Posted October 21, 2011 Posted October 21, 2011 PS it'll be tough but maybe it's best. Plus you've taken the first step in deciding to do it so good for you
Author amandap Posted October 21, 2011 Author Posted October 21, 2011 Thanks dovic, i will try to be strong, he took me out a couple of weeks only fo an hour to buy something for me i needed, i just chatted with no mention of our relationship and as i got out the car he kissed my cheek and blew me a kiss as i said take care, wouldnt it be great to be able to to know what they are truely thinking, i just wonder if they really know what they want, its almost like they dont want us at the moment but dont want us to move on, i will try and come on here on saturday night and let you know how it went, it will be hard saying those words to him but i know its for the best, my heart needs to heal, and as they say if you love them set them free, and if they truely love you they will come back, i just feel that at the moment he feels safe knowing he can talk to me every week, he isnt going to miss me, but once i go NC time will tell, i want him to miss me, i want him to think he has lost me forever, i have decided that if he wants me back its going to take more than a phone call, he will have to show me, and work to get me back, As they say dovic if you truely want something enough its worth fighting for, so i will leave the ball in his court, hopefully by doing this he will respect me more and realise what he's lost, and if he doesnt then at least i can move forward very slowly as i know it will take me a very long time to get over him
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