ilovedhim Posted October 20, 2011 Posted October 20, 2011 Hi everyone. It's been a long time since I posted. A few weeks ago I found out my ex was cheating on me with atleast one person the last few months of our relationship. At that time we were broken up but still trying to work through issues. We've been NC for 2 weeks now, and I've been ignoring him since late July. He tries to contact me probably wants to get back or FWB. i dont really care what he wants, he made my life miserable while we were together. Any advice on how to make the pain go away. I'm dating someone and lately have been taking it out on my new bf.
Cee Posted October 20, 2011 Posted October 20, 2011 Give yourself time to heal. There's no way to rush getting over the betrayal of infidelity. I found out my ex cheated a few months after I broke up with him. Even though I left him, the discovery of his cheating nearly destroyed me. What I did was continued NC and worked on myself. I channelled my anger into doing good things for me. And that paid off in time. I'm sorry for what happened to you. The wound does heal. Give it time and be good to yourself.
futuregopher Posted October 20, 2011 Posted October 20, 2011 You should feel good about yourself that you've moved on and found someone better. Don't dwell on the past because you're going to have good times with your current boyfriend. The good thing is that you realize you're taking it out on him. It's not fair to him. You're fortunate to have someone again in your life so enjoy it!!
nyckidd Posted October 20, 2011 Posted October 20, 2011 I had the exact same thing happen to me with on of my exs from the past. I was on the road to recovery after a horrible split, and about 3 months in I find out she had cheated on me towards the end as well. It hurt but in a weird way it was a good thing because it made me feel like I could really move on and do much better than that. It was a combination of anger and relief for the simple fact that she showed her true colors and I could finally move on to better things. So if I were you, I would just take it as a sign to move on with your life and find someone who will treat you the way you deserve.
sadprincess Posted October 20, 2011 Posted October 20, 2011 I just found out my ex s has his eye on someone else last night. So knowing this kills. But don't turn turn against ur new relationship if this person has potential. U don't want to be ur ex. There a guy buggin me, I feel vulnerable and revengeful to move on with my life, but I don't see a future with that guy and don't want to hurt anyone. Just have fun if u think u can have something more with this newbie
wilsonx Posted October 20, 2011 Posted October 20, 2011 Hi everyone. It's been a long time since I posted. A few weeks ago I found out my ex was cheating on me with atleast one person the last few months of our relationship. At that time we were broken up but still trying to work through issues. We've been NC for 2 weeks now, and I've been ignoring him since late July. He tries to contact me probably wants to get back or FWB. i dont really care what he wants, he made my life miserable while we were together. Any advice on how to make the pain go away. I'm dating someone and lately have been taking it out on my new bf. Well that sucks, like you I realized my ex had cheated on me a lot. Thats why she would never trust me. There's nothing you can do about it now, can you? You shouldn't take it out on yourself or someone else! You just have to let it go. I wanted to add something as well. If you were dating me this early on and already taking things out on me, you would be kicked to the curb. If he's taking it, it means water seeks its own level. He's just as hurt and angry as you are. You did not have time to grieve the relationship or feel the pain and acknowledge it was there. You are using another relationship to cover it up and its not working. If you want the pain to go away, you need to stop focusing on the past and the future focus now on your present. As long as you keep yourself in the present, it will go away. I did not think this was true with my dad telling me this, I just never tried it. Once I started just listening to the silence in between sounds and really looking at things and their textures of what they are made up of, my mind stopped and the pain went away
LostInLimbo Posted October 20, 2011 Posted October 20, 2011 Hi everyone. It's been a long time since I posted. A few weeks ago I found out my ex was cheating on me with atleast one person the last few months of our relationship. At that time we were broken up but still trying to work through issues. We've been NC for 2 weeks now, and I've been ignoring him since late July. He tries to contact me probably wants to get back or FWB. i dont really care what he wants, he made my life miserable while we were together. Any advice on how to make the pain go away. I'm dating someone and lately have been taking it out on my new bf. its hard to give advice on making pain go away, I have been there and was there, but in a better place now, its just one of those things that heal within time on its own..... Best Wishes, its a terrible feeling, I know LiL
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