fetish1980 Posted October 17, 2011 Posted October 17, 2011 Hey LS, I met this girl a couple of weeks ago at happy hour. I had conversed with her on some previous occasions, but this time, I finally succeeded in getting her number. About a week or 2 ago, I called her and we talked for about 20 minutes. She was taking her son somewhere. I started probing her for information on her likes and dislikes. She mentioned she loves tea such as orange, but hates green tea. Anyway, I googled specialty tea shops in my area and found this specialty tea shop. The clerk recommended a popular special blend that is supposed to help boost mood, the immune system, blood pressure, and all kinds of stuff, and it has a great aroma. I asked a few women around my job on their opinions and they thought it was nice and loved the scent. So i shot her a text on Friday: me: Hey ms lady how r u? U think we could meet briefly tommorow for about 45 minutes? her: What did you have in mind? I'm working tomorow so it will have to be kind of early. To sum it up, we met at 11am the next day and we talked. Had a very good conversation and she was giving soe nice vibes. I gave her the present and she looked so flattered but kind of clowned my gift wrapping skills, but thanked me and smiled. At the end of the date, she said " Thanks for lunch and my present, this was a good start" We hugged. I didn't try to go for a kiss or anything, but left on a good note. I texted her yesterday am saying: Goodmorning sunshine! Just seeing if you got enough rest and hope you're having a good day. She texted back about 12 hrs later: Sorry for the late reply. Hope you had a great sunday. Bout to pass out. goodnight. This morning. She texted me: "Love the tea. Thanks again. have a great morning." I replied, "I'm glad you love it. Let me know if it does all the things it claims it supposed to do (smile). I'll be in touch! Now for my my question, Lately being back in the dating scene, i haven't really been able to seal the deal (and you know what i mean ). I'll go on a few dates but it never really gets past that. I don't want to mess this one up. I'm trying not to be too overbearing on texting her or calling her because she might think she has a bugaboo on her hands. But, i don't want to mess up my window of opportunity either by trying to play it too cool. How long is too soon or too long to set up a second date? I don't want to appear too clingy or predictable. Need some input on this. fetish
Leegh Posted October 17, 2011 Posted October 17, 2011 If you plan to see her on the week-end, I would call her no later than on a Tuesday or Wednesday evening, as girls in general don't like to be called late in the week for week-end dates. If you email her beforehand, please be specific with her. Speaking for myself, I think I blew it with a guy, as he sent me an email on a Monday morning and said he would call me that week, and I waited for the call which never came. Now I think he could have thought I wasn't interested since I never emailed him back to say that I was looking forward to his call, etc.; yet I was interested. I guess mis-communication. Please make it very clear that you would like to have a date with her, rather than something vague. In addition, that was very sweet of you to give her the tea.
Author fetish1980 Posted October 17, 2011 Author Posted October 17, 2011 Thanks Leegh, appreciate your POV. I hope that giving her that tea wasn't too soft. LOL. Some women take kindness for weakness. fetish
Author fetish1980 Posted October 28, 2011 Author Posted October 28, 2011 (edited) Well, it's now been about 2 weeks since i last saw the girl and gave her the tea. We've talked on the phone several times for over an hour each time. We've exchanged text messages and things like that. She's been talking about a tough project she's had at work and how she's been stressed about it. Sometimes she'll just send me a text out of the blue saying" Hey you. tell me something good!" However, i've been pushing for a second meet last weekend and tried this weekend. She says she's had her son these last 2 weekends and hasn't been able to meet for a 2nd date. Now, i don't have kids. But if i did, i would find a way around things. Maybe have my mother watch my kid for me or something? I don't want to come off as pushy or anythng but I feel the longer we wait, those feelings of romance i gave her 2 weeks ago are going to fade. I've been talking to other women so my patience wouldn't wear so thin with this girl, but it is getting frustrating. Any advice would be appreciated. fetish Edited October 28, 2011 by fetish1980
Author fetish1980 Posted October 28, 2011 Author Posted October 28, 2011 (edited) bump. any input? Could really use some more opinions. Thanks in advance fetish Edited October 28, 2011 by fetish1980
TigerCub Posted October 28, 2011 Posted October 28, 2011 Chances are if this woman is interested in you, she might be feeling like she's losing her opportunity with you because obviously being a mother comes first. And since you don't have kids, she might actually feel like this could complicate things in your eyes. So, I don't know when you called her last, but call her a few days after that, and just tell her, "I really enjoyed being with you, I'd like to take you out again, but I understand that your time may not be as flexible as mine due to what days you have with your son. So give me a shout when your free to go out because I'd love to get to know you better" That's pretty much all you can do. Then it will be clear to her that you're interested and that you understand that her time isn't as flexible due to her mommy duties. Whatever she decides to do from there will tell you if there's something to build on or not. Good luck
Author fetish1980 Posted October 28, 2011 Author Posted October 28, 2011 thanks tclub. i've conveyed interest in her by both text and our phone conversations. I've told her that i really enjoyed spending time with her and look forward to it again, but when i try to take the lead and set something up, I pretty much just get a "we'll see" or "can't promise anything". However, we'll sit on the phone and talk for a real long time, but it gets to the point that i don't want to do too much talking or else she'll either get bored and lose interest, or i'll wind up saying something stupid. I guess i would be complaining too if she set up a date and then cancelled. Then i'd call her a flake. I know i may be being a little selfish but can't the son go stay with her mom for a few hours? fetish
Author fetish1980 Posted October 29, 2011 Author Posted October 29, 2011 i suppose you're right TLG, i need to just be patient. I'm just thinking the romance i started will wear off after not seeing her. And i understand her son comes before anything, it just sucks for me. Thanks for your viewpoint and still looking forward to more. fetish
Recommended Posts