lalala Posted May 18, 2004 Posted May 18, 2004 So here's the deal, I was dating this guy for about four months and it had been fun. It was a long-distance relationship and we only saw each other about once a month. I never cheated on the guy, but I would still go out on the weekends with my girlfriends and act like I was single and free. He obviously had stronger feelings than I did and made it clear that he wanted a serious relationship, however, I wasn't ready for one. At the same time, I enjoyed dating him. When the fourth month hit...things got weird...he became distant and easily irritated with me. We had "the talk" and he intiated the idea that we shouldn't date anymore. His reasons were that I was not affectionate enough and that I didn't show a real interest in the relationship. Basically, he wanted more than I could give at the time and we both knew it. At the time, I agreed and we broke up. We have been apart for about five months. We decided that we could still be friends. In fact, we talk about every couple of weeks online. But, he made it seem as though he didn't want to talk on the phone. Since we have broken up, I have dated a few guys, but no matches. I honestly have my ex on the back of my mind. Could it just be that he was my first real boyfriend? What I do know is that I really do care about him and miss him. I've given him his space, but I want to try at our relationship again. I am not the same person as I was before, I have since graduated from college and no longer have the same casual feelings about dating. There is somehting about him that just suits me...our talks, our moments when we were in the same frame of mind. Well, he recently called me out of the blue...and we hadn't spoken to each other in a few weeks. We only talked for about 15 minutes and then I had to go...but the converstaion was nice and we laughed and I knew that I missed him. He wanted me to go check him out at one of his concerts...so I went. When we hugged...it felt really good. Before, a hug was just a hug, but this time it felt right to me. Although we didn't get a chance to talk, we hugged a few times and there seemed to be extra affection. He would hold my hands for a few moments...I'd touch his arm. Keep in mind, there are people around from his concert who want to talk to him...and some of them know that we used to date...so even if I wanted to...we couldn't be all over each other and talk to each other forever. How do I show him that I really do care about him and want a second chance? Was it a coincidece that he called me? I mean, we hadn't spoken in awhile and surely not on the phone. Should I make the first move since I messed up the first time? We still live in seperate cities so I can't just flirt with him whenever I see him. If I'm going to do this...I have to be bold, right? The impression that he left me with by the way he hugged and touched me was that he still was attracted to me and was interested enough to call. Or is this some sick thing that guys do to there exes? What do I do?...the truth is ....I do love him.
shellgranado Posted May 18, 2004 Posted May 18, 2004 ok by dating before you know what each other is like you know the rules before you take the step of taking him back think real hard you know he wants a serious relationship he did in the first time you dated so he will in the 2nd times you date so so are you really ready if not then dont bother if you think you really like him want to be with him then go for it but its going to be tough and you are going to have to do a alot of schedual changing alot of travling your life will change you will have to put more effert out this time not as many weekends out with the girls you will have to spend 99% of all free time and weekends with him also by sending cute little emails everyuday flowers and cards stuff to let him know you want him that your serious but remember you dont have to do all the work its 50/50
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