jean2011 Posted October 17, 2011 Posted October 17, 2011 let me give some background info first: C and i have know each other since preschool, but we didnt become good friends until the 9th grade. the summer after 9th grade we started dating. we had our ups and downs but it was mostly a very good relationship that ended after two years because we would be about 3 hours away from each other when college started. C and i both did some crazy things while being single, and tried to move on. now, D and I have been very good friends since the 7th grade. i am best friends with his sister. ive always had that secret best friends brother crush on him and when C and i broke up he was there for me, and cares about me a lot. big problem: C and D are very close friends. recently, C and i began talking again a few weeks ago. he misses me a lot and wants to get back together. i explained to him that a lot of things had to change before i would consider dating him again, but he is being really amazing about everything and trying really hard to work things out. i told D that i was talking to C again to which he replied, "C is a very good friend, but i just saw him make you upset and everything else that happened and i dont want to see that happen to you again." D's mom told me that D likes me. upon questioning him, he confirmed. ive made list after list of pros and cons... and they're both so equal. the two of them are very alike actually. a relationship with D would be easier since hes only 10 minutes away, but C and i have such a history... both of them are looking for long-term committed relationships. i know both of them very well and hate the thought of hurting one. please tell me what to do?! sooo confused and dont know what to do. please help me!!! -K
Cracker Jack Posted October 17, 2011 Posted October 17, 2011 Don't date either of them. Sounds like a difficult situation to be in, but you don't want to be the one to potentially put a strain on their friendship. I'm sure you'll still entertain the idea of dating one of them, and that's fine. Just try to think about the issues that comes with it a bit more.
Leegh Posted October 17, 2011 Posted October 17, 2011 It sounds as if you like both of these guys, but usually when one has romantic feelings for someone it is very clear, and one does not have to make a list, etc. To my mind, it seems as if you like both of them as very good friends, and that there is some chemistry with them, but not strong romantic chemistry on your part. Possibly there is someone that you have not met yet, that you may feel romantic love for sometime down the road, and if you are with one of these guys, you won't be free to meet this new guy. I think it would be fine to keep up with these two guys, but maybe not as a "girlfriend/boyfriend" relationship.
Author jean2011 Posted October 18, 2011 Author Posted October 18, 2011 but i know that there was that romantic involvement with C, which can resurface. and i can picture it happening with D. i could easily fall for either of them and be happy. and if im happy, theres no need to meet anyone else. whoever this new guy is.
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