Queenvan Posted October 16, 2011 Posted October 16, 2011 i am new to the love shack, not sure if this for me. i have a lover who is my neighbor. he is married and she knows exactly who i am. she even walked in on us. i want to end the actions that take place between us. how do i get free. she knows that her husband loves me and i told her to keep him because i am not interested in marriage. she is so passive or controlled that it's scary. he is a no nonsense man and he can take care of us both. but, i just think the whole block is crazy and on fire. i may have set the match but i am not trying to get burned.
mike111 Posted October 16, 2011 Posted October 16, 2011 Reads like a messy situation. But can you not just stop it? You are a part of this too. mike
Author Queenvan Posted October 16, 2011 Author Posted October 16, 2011 when i attempt to break things off he will start acting crazy ! knocking on my window and waiting for me to leave so he can say something. but, he is smart enough not to call and leave a record.
geegirl Posted October 16, 2011 Posted October 16, 2011 You want someone else to take responsibility to end this for you. You can easily say NO and stop, if you really do not want to continue with him anymore. If his wife is passive, what does that make you?
geegirl Posted October 16, 2011 Posted October 16, 2011 when i attempt to break things off he will start acting crazy ! knocking on my window and waiting for me to leave so he can say something. but, he is smart enough not to call and leave a record. Don't answer him if he knocks on your window. Let him wait for you and you just ignore him. Don't sleep with him. Tell him you will file a police report for harassment. Something. If you entertain his tantrums, he will continue.
mike111 Posted October 17, 2011 Posted October 17, 2011 when i attempt to break things off he will start acting crazy ! knocking on my window and waiting for me to leave so he can say something. but, he is smart enough not to call and leave a record. Can you file a report with the police? If you want to do that, you'll need to start creating a simple 'pencil and paper' record of any unwanted contact he has made with you. Make photo copies of it and keep a file for yourself. The "crazy" and "knocking on my window" thing sounds a little alarming. I would dislike that myself. mike
Author Queenvan Posted October 17, 2011 Author Posted October 17, 2011 thanks !! started working on that, the problem is exactly that, HE IS THE POLICE !!
Author Queenvan Posted October 17, 2011 Author Posted October 17, 2011 Very worried !!!you want someone else to take responsibility to end this for you. You can easily say no and stop, if you really do not want to continue with him anymore. If his wife is passive, what does that make you?
geegirl Posted October 17, 2011 Posted October 17, 2011 thanks !! started working on that, the problem is exactly that, HE IS THE POLICE !! Oh boy! I'm not sure if telling him you will report him will cause him to back off seeing that it may tarnish his reputation, unless it's a police station of cronies. If going to the police won't help, maybe just keep ignoring him and not giving him what he wants and he'll stop. Worse would be to move and if you own, that's not an option. It's concerning now that he is a police officer and feels he can do anything. Hopefully others can offer better advice.
mike111 Posted October 17, 2011 Posted October 17, 2011 thanks !! started working on that, the problem is exactly that, HE IS THE POLICE !! Sometimes that's ok, when........you can go over his head to his superiors? I dated a women who went through hell with her cop ex-husband. He did, finally, end up in jail. Be well. mike
TheDovic Posted October 17, 2011 Posted October 17, 2011 Well it's not going to be easy, but you've got to be strong if you really don't want to get burned. This fool is having his cake and eating it too! Sooooo, tell him it's over and don't give in so easily when he gets crazy. If you're afraid of what he might do then get a restraining order or threaten to tell his wife!
geegirl Posted October 17, 2011 Posted October 17, 2011 Well it's not going to be easy, but you've got to be strong if you really don't want to get burned. This fool is having his cake and eating it too! Sooooo, tell him it's over and don't give in so easily when he gets crazy. If you're afraid of what he might do then get a restraining order or threaten to tell his wife! He is a police officer and his wife knows, Dovic. That's why it's a pickle!
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