schaller Posted October 16, 2011 Posted October 16, 2011 Hi everybody, You can find my whole story in previous posts. My BF of 3 years (living with me for 2) broke up with me out of the blue because he did not know what love is anymore (I was his first love even though he's 27), he feels attracted to other women, did not meet at the right time, etc. Last time we met (2 weeks ago) he was reminded of everything he adored about me and told me "I have to think about us" to which I said "ok but I might not be there for you if you realize I'm the one for you" So about 2 weeks ago he insisted on giving me back my snowboard and said he would email me about the it during the week. He never did. I saw him yesterday at a bar and although he did not see me one of his friends did. I left immediately. Well today, he emailed me and asked me if I wanted my snowboard back. I told him he could leave it near the back door of my building and that I would get it later. Then he emailed me back asking whether I still have some of his clothes which I don't as I put everything in a box for him. I told him I had cleaned everything and I just had one of his bath towels. 1 hour later he texts me this time (I don't even have his number anymore but he does since I told him he could contact me if he wanted to hear from me. He freaked out when I told him I was deleting him from my life) and asked me if I was going to be home in 15 minutes? That's when I though "what the hell?. I told him once again to leave the board and that I would pick it up later. He dais that somebody could take it though to which I replied that if it happens then it was meant to be this way. Finally he texted me that he had dropped it. I took it and I texted him back telling him I had it and thank you. Right after he texted "You're welcome. Are things going well?" I replied by "yep" which is true. I'm not crying anymore, I feel fine when I get up in the mornin evern though he's not by my side, etc. Of course I still have feelings for him. What to make of those exchanges? I know I'm looking too much into it but I think he cares about me but this is it, he doesn't love me anymore. He just wants to check if I'm ok because he obviously cares and you cannot go from spending 3 years together to absolutely nothing (up to the break up he was texting me everyday even if we lived together with just a "kisses", was very affectionate). Plus we had a very quiet breakup (I did not scream and accepted it. I even comforted him and told him he was a great guy which made it even harder for him and he ended up asking me several times if he was making the right thing) and our relationship was healthy too. What do you guys think? What should I do? I think I don't want him to come back anyway. Did I react well? Is he ever going to contact me again?
B_55 Posted October 16, 2011 Posted October 16, 2011 You said it yourself, you don't even think you want him to come back. I can say from personal experience that you really don't know what you've lost til its gone. In this case I would imagine he sees you moving on, and it's starting to hit him that there is no going back. Or he feels guilty and is trying to relieve his guilt. Either way, right now is about what you want! He gave up his right to influence your wants when he left you. As for if you reacted well or not; I will just say that's the way I would want react if I was in your situation.
TheDovic Posted October 17, 2011 Posted October 17, 2011 (1)What do you guys think? (2)What should I do? I think I don't want him to come back anyway. (3)Did I react well? (4)Is he ever going to contact me again? 1) He is acting like this because he isn't sure he made the right decision OR because he's feeling guilty. 2) You should continue to stay out of his life as this is infinitely more attractive as it makes you unattainable and mysterious. Furthermore it gives you the chance to heal, which is most important. 3) You reacted extremely well. The best way to get your ex back, OR simply to maintain your dignity is to act as though you're ok with the breakup and you have done this. 4) More than likely, because I believe he is undecided AND because he can no longer just have you.
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