Buttercup84 Posted October 15, 2011 Posted October 15, 2011 I am a bit embaressed about this hehe. But no one has mentioned this before I think. I miss having the intimate contact with my ex. Today I was shopping and was going to look at nice underwear but got a bit sad thinking that I will no longer be able to wear nice things for him . I am not into one night stands , I miss being able to kiss someone and just have a man hold me in his arms. I am not ready for a relationship at all , I want to be alone. The longest I have gone without sex was two years.God I hope that won't happen again. Anyone else feeling the same ?
BrettLost Posted October 15, 2011 Posted October 15, 2011 Ooooo yea. Us guys by nature need sex, alot. But I found that it's not the actual sex life I miss. It's general female companionship I am craving. Like you mention, routine things like eating with them, sleeping next to them, showering;), couch time, it all just aint the same now. Plus all the little jars youse can't open, shelves that are too high, bugs youse are scared of, boxes that are too heavy... to feel needed/wanted like that is just as powerful as sexually needed/wanted (i said just as powerful, not as enjoyable) although you can't really have one without the other. 1
Author Buttercup84 Posted October 15, 2011 Author Posted October 15, 2011 Ooooo yea. Us guys by nature need sex, alot. But I found that it's not the actual sex life I miss. It's general female companionship I am craving. Like you mention, routine things like eating with them, sleeping next to them, showering;), couch time, it all just aint the same now. Plus all the little jars youse can't open, shelves that are too high, bugs youse are scared of, boxes that are too heavy... to feel needed/wanted like that is just as powerful as sexually needed/wanted (i said just as powerful, not as enjoyable) although you can't really have one without the other. You seem really sweet.It is nice that you miss those little things.
triphopper414 Posted October 15, 2011 Posted October 15, 2011 I used to sexually fantasize about my ex all the time. We did not have a lot of physical intimacy since we were long distance, but I think about it because there was not a lot of it. A lot of phone sex, dirty letters, and sexting. It is normal to miss that. Good thing you are just thinking about the sex (which to some there is no attachment) rather than the bad aspects and thoughts that would force you to talk to him or want to get back together with him. Just fantasize about someone else that is more good looking. That is what I do, and it helps! (PS I am not embarrassed, it is human nature)
stargirl259 Posted October 15, 2011 Posted October 15, 2011 I used to sexually fantasize about my ex all the time. We did not have a lot of physical intimacy since we were long distance, but I think about it because there was not a lot of it. A lot of phone sex, dirty letters, and sexting. It is normal to miss that. Good thing you are just thinking about the sex (which to some there is no attachment) rather than the bad aspects and thoughts that would force you to talk to him or want to get back together with him. Just fantasize about someone else that is more good looking. That is what I do, and it helps! (PS I am not embarrassed, it is human nature) That is a really good idea! My ex and I didn't have a lot of physical intimacy either because of long distance but when we did spend time together, it was amazing and I miss that amazing feeling.
dicky_fish Posted October 15, 2011 Posted October 15, 2011 Glad I'm not the only one to post on this... http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t296625/ Yep I'm gagging for it, but at the same time she's the only one I want to do it with.
TheDovic Posted October 15, 2011 Posted October 15, 2011 Yessssssssssssssss!!!!! Fingers crossed I have a good night out then
favabean Posted October 15, 2011 Posted October 15, 2011 I am going through the same thing. I was the one who broke up with my ex because it wasn't a good relationship anymore. But the sex was great. He was the first person I slept with, and I never found myself thinking about sex even close to this much BEFORE the relationship... and now I find myself fantasizing all the time about all the things we did. It's driving me crazy! I also am not interested in casual sex. I WOULD be interested in a new relationship, but that could take forever to find. How do I make it stop??
Kageytn Posted October 15, 2011 Posted October 15, 2011 Mine withdrew sexually about a month before we broke up. I always had a bigger drive than him and he used it to control me. That hurt. I don't miss sex with him-we rarely had it and it was getting very perfunctory. I miss taking naps with him and watching tv with him. My dog is just not the same. My children no longer nap. I have been talking to him (yes, I know. Moth-flame. Electric shock-lab rat) and he keeps alluding to sex. He doesn't get to know. And I'm not sleeping with him. It's driving him nuts. I like it.
Marianis Posted October 15, 2011 Posted October 15, 2011 That is a really good idea! My ex and I didn't have a lot of physical intimacy either because of long distance but when we did spend time together, it was amazing and I miss that amazing feeling. Yesterday i was thinking the same thing as buttercup84 and since I was in a LDR too like triphopper414 and stargirl259 so i also miss the things we used to do .. i miss to see pictures of him and me taking pics for him! :S ... i dont like taking pics of myself anymore and .. we also used to write stories and read them to each other so it was really exiting :S i also miss the feeling that i had when i saw him again at the airport waiting to give him a kiss and hold his hand again. its hard! ..
PositiveNegative Posted October 15, 2011 Posted October 15, 2011 Yup. I miss the sex. I miss always sleeping naked with her. It absolutely kills to think of her being intimate with someone else. KILLS.
eleanorhurting Posted October 15, 2011 Posted October 15, 2011 I miss it too!! I hate that for a long time I could not fantasize about it with anyone but him. I felt it tied me even more to him. But then the other day something great happened! I started fantasizing about an intern in the hospital. And now when I think of sex I try to picture him instead of my ex. But yes I totally miss it
M2155 Posted October 15, 2011 Posted October 15, 2011 But then the other day something great happened! I started fantasizing about an intern in the hospital. And now when I think of sex I try to picture him instead of my ex. This is a great feeling, felt like a breakthrough. Happened to me (not an intern at the hospital:laugh:) and I'm not going after the guy but I was just happy to divert my attention to someone else.
favabean Posted October 15, 2011 Posted October 15, 2011 I miss it too!! I hate that for a long time I could not fantasize about it with anyone but him. I felt it tied me even more to him. But then the other day something great happened! I started fantasizing about an intern in the hospital. And now when I think of sex I try to picture him instead of my ex. How long was "a long time"? It's been less than a month for me, but it sucks... several times a day I will spontaneously think back to a specific memory of being intimate with him, and it gives me butterflies. So in a way, imagining it is "rewarding" to me because I enjoy it. But it just wastes time, distracts me from the present and future, and makes me feel a sad and yucky pang of loss afterwards. I want to stop.
formybrokenheart Posted October 15, 2011 Posted October 15, 2011 "Anyone else feeling the same ?" Yep, I have been without for over three years now and am about to give up. It's been 10 since I was touched or anything else by someone I actually wanted to be intimate with....
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