counterman Posted October 17, 2011 Posted October 17, 2011 Hokie, you would be so awesome with women if you got over this issue. Seriously, you'll have it easier than a lot of guys. If only you could truly accept yourself and continue to work on yourself... it's a never-ending process and things will get tough but there's more to gain by going this way then blaming it on things. Look around this board and ask yourself do you want to be really bitter and really angry all the time and constantly hating. Laugh in the face of rejection, because it's hilarious at times; it's what I do anyways As I always say, you know how mad I would be with girls if I had your body? I will work on mine though, and will put my my mind to it!
lino Posted October 17, 2011 Posted October 17, 2011 Did you consider what I once suggested to you in another topic you started a while back talking about the exact same thing? You really need to become someone who is proud of their heritage & culture otherwise you'll never beat this.
Author USMCHokie Posted October 17, 2011 Author Posted October 17, 2011 Hokie, you would be so awesome with women if you got over this issue. Seriously, you'll have it easier than a lot of guys. If only you could truly accept yourself and continue to work on yourself... it's a never-ending process and things will get tough but there's more to gain by going this way then blaming it on things. Look around this board and ask yourself do you want to be really bitter and really angry all the time and constantly hating. Laugh in the face of rejection, because it's hilarious at times; it's what I do anyways As I always say, you know how mad I would be with girls if I had your body? I will work on mine though, and will put my my mind to it! I know...I realize I've just been lazy and would rather just hate and make excuses because it's easier...I want to believe that it's never my fault, so I blame everything else... And it takes more than a body to attract a quality woman...the ones for which a body is enough are usually not the ones you want...ideally, I want a girl that falls for my personality without having seen my body, and then when the clothes come off, she realizes how lucky she is that she got the whole package...the body is just dessert...not the main entree...
Author USMCHokie Posted October 17, 2011 Author Posted October 17, 2011 Did you consider what I once suggested to you in another topic you started a while back talking about the exact same thing? You really need to become someone who is proud of their heritage & culture otherwise you'll never beat this. I remember you mentioning that I should live in the motherland for a bit...unfortunately, my career prevents me from doing such a thing...though I may try to go to Japan in a few years as my next duty station... And I understand being proud of ones heritage, but I feel that my heritage really is Amrrrcan...my parents' background just feels foreign to me, as they let me go from it at a very early age and really made no attempts to educate me on it...
zengirl Posted October 17, 2011 Posted October 17, 2011 I remember you mentioning that I should live in the motherland for a bit...unfortunately, my career prevents me from doing such a thing...though I may try to go to Japan in a few years as my next duty station... And I understand being proud of ones heritage, but I feel that my heritage really is Amrrrcan...my parents' background just feels foreign to me, as they let me go from it at a very early age and really made no attempts to educate me on it... Hokie, you're not going to feel any better about your Chinese heritage in Japan. I love Japan and my heritage there. However, the Japanese are extremely racist against the Chinese. It doesn't get revealed in the same ways as rednecks here, but imagine really subtle rednecks in Texas and how they feel about Mexican immigrants. Your military status may temper that some, but it's not like they feel all Asians are in it together. You'd be better off in Hawaii or a West Coast base. I feel like time in Japan would only reinforce your current views. Just an aside, but there it is. As to heritage, I think you can be American and have an American heritage and have other heritage as well. But I don't think you HAVE to have it. My dad very rarely thinks about his Japanese heritage and cannot speak Japanese. I can speak it fluently, have lived there, am very close to my grandparents here (Japanese American) and family in Japan, etc. So, it also doesn't necessarily have to follow a generational trail.
Author USMCHokie Posted October 17, 2011 Author Posted October 17, 2011 As to heritage, I think you can be American and have an American heritage and have other heritage as well. But I don't think you HAVE to have it. My dad very rarely thinks about his Japanese heritage and cannot speak Japanese. I can speak it fluently, have lived there, am very close to my grandparents here (Japanese American) and family in Japan, etc. So, it also doesn't necessarily have to follow a generational trail. Well, as you have pointed out, you definitely have to be proactive or you'll lose it.
Author USMCHokie Posted October 17, 2011 Author Posted October 17, 2011 The problem isn't your looks. You're not my type but you're alright looking. It's that your personality is such a massive turn off, Hokie. MASSIVE. Incredibly self loathing, passive, conformist, spineless. You don't seem to have anything other than working out that you're really passionate about. These are traits you could change if you really wanted to but you seem to have no motivation to grow. I know you claim this is all "under wraps" in real life. Bullsht. These traits come out one way or another. They have to. People are more perceptive than you think. Fair enough, I see now how much of a turnoff being self-loathing and passive can be...but spineless...? Not sure where you got that one, but you are entitled to perceive me how you will. Perception may not be reality, but perception is certainly real. I am also passionate about things other than working out or the Marines, but I don't really talk about them on LS. Again, perception is real. No skin off my back.
Star Gazer Posted October 17, 2011 Posted October 17, 2011 Fair enough, I see now how much of a turnoff being self-loathing and passive can be...but spineless...? Yes, I have definitely observed spineless behavior from you, and yes, it's a major turnoff. Ever notice how I was attracted to you at thr height of your confidence? Or at least when you were projecting confidence? And then ran like hell when signs of emotional cowardice starting bubbling to the surface? Like your betrayal of my confidences? I am also passionate about things other than working out or the Marines, but I don't really talk about them on LS. Such as? Do you not talk about them at all, ever? Because you never shared any other interests with me... And if you're truly passionate about it, you'd e talking about it.
Author USMCHokie Posted October 17, 2011 Author Posted October 17, 2011 Yes, I have definitely observed spineless behavior from you, and yes, it's a major turnoff. Ever notice how I was attracted to you at thr height of your confidence? Or at least when you were projecting confidence? And then ran like hell when signs of emotional cowardice starting bubbling to the surface? Like your betrayal of my confidences? I guess my self-awareness is a bit off...especially when everyone is saying so...something to work on then... And yes, I do remember that. I was feeling pretty great about myself back then, even before you noticed me...it was than just a fake projection...and I want to get back to that point...seriously, where did i go wrong...?
Star Gazer Posted October 17, 2011 Posted October 17, 2011 I was feeling pretty great about myself back then...it was than just a fake projection... You were feeling great, or it was fake? It can't be both.
Author USMCHokie Posted October 17, 2011 Author Posted October 17, 2011 You were feeling great, or it was fake? It can't be both. Whoops. *More than.
Author USMCHokie Posted October 17, 2011 Author Posted October 17, 2011 Do you want me to send you a link to an Asian guy here in So Cal who has dated white Playboy models? He also used to date a blonde that most people would consider a perfect 10. He is full Asian and only dates whites/latina chicks and most of them are models.... He is older than you and makes craploads of money. He is also tall and buff as well. I can send you links if it will prove to you that there ARE Asian guys having sex with "model" chicks. I bet the girls he get gets are better looking than the ones your friend gets; some of the girls he has banged have been in Playboy! However, this guy is not a nice guy though. He is a jerk and doesn't care about the Playboy models he dates and cheats on THEM; the girls are nothing to him but conquests. He doesn't give a crap about them. He can also be abusive but he gets all the girls. He ONLY dates white and latina model types. A lot of guys here look up to him because he is a known baller. He is very successful though (went to graduate school, like you) and he is 6ft tall. Has exotic cars. However, his attitude is wayyyy better than you and the thinks and KNOWS that he is the ISH. He never wants to get married; he would just rather be a bachelor forever and just bang models and the models are nothing but "hoes" to him; they are the ones who want to tie him down. I can show you photos etc so you can see how you compare. He is not that much better looking than you. There was a pretty Latina moaning to him on Myspace how she missed having sex with him and just ignored her lol cause he already moved on to other women. I can't say I'm impressed. Playboy models are hardly the epitome of quality to me. But good for him.
Author USMCHokie Posted October 17, 2011 Author Posted October 17, 2011 But I thought you said you were jealous of your friends cause they were banging HOT girls who are 10's. I thought you wanted to experience that, being a player and getting bedding LOTS of hot women. Are you looking for HOT or Quality? Why are you looking for quality if you want flings and one night stands like your friends? Do you think your friends are looking for quality when they are playing around and having one night sex and sex adventures? You contradict yourself. First you said you want to date hot and attractive women every night like your friends and be a playa. Now you say you want "quality". Why would quality matters if you don't want a relationship? You said yourself that a relationship will make you feel resentful because you'll feel like you're "missing out". Why would quality even be a factor? Nope, you're absolutely right, I did say I was jealous of them and wished I could do what they did. But I was in a relatively bad place in my life mentally and emotionally, and I was searching for something I thought I wanted because it was constantly shoved in my face. I was comparing myself to others and trying to be as good as they were. But I've learned through all the feedback I've gotten from you all on LS that I don't have to be that guy...I don't want to be that guy...and I've learned that I can offer quality to a girl, so I should expect the same quality back... I'm trying hard to change back to the way I was almost exactly one year ago...I was happy...
Star Gazer Posted October 17, 2011 Posted October 17, 2011 I'm trying hard to change back to the way I was almost exactly one year ago...I was happy... A year ago you had a quality women smitten with you. So, you were feeling good and validating your worth through her. Because I do remember you questioning why she'd ever want to be with you, and outright saying you didn't think you were good enough.
Author USMCHokie Posted October 17, 2011 Author Posted October 17, 2011 A year ago you had a quality women smitten with you. So, you were feeling good and validating your worth through her. Because I do remember you questioning why she'd ever want to be with you, and outright saying you didn't think you were good enough. True. And it was all downhill from there. But I was good for months before said quality woman came into the picture... Oh well, all in the past. Live and learn. I can't do anything to change all that.
wuggle Posted October 17, 2011 Posted October 17, 2011 True. And it was all downhill from there. But I was good for months before said quality woman came into the picture... Oh well, all in the past. Live and learn. I can't do anything to change all that. Jeez, have you two not got a room already ? why ?
Author USMCHokie Posted October 18, 2011 Author Posted October 18, 2011 Jeez, have you two not got a room already ? why ? Because I turned into a whiney bitch. Time for me to own up to it.
Dust Posted October 18, 2011 Posted October 18, 2011 True. And it was all downhill from there. But I was good for months before said quality woman came into the picture... Oh well, all in the past. Live and learn. I can't do anything to change all that. She's not talking about herself is she?
Star Gazer Posted October 18, 2011 Posted October 18, 2011 She's not talking about herself is she? Yes, "she" was.
Nexus One Posted October 18, 2011 Posted October 18, 2011 A year ago you had a quality women smitten with you. So, you were feeling good and validating your worth through her. Because I do remember you questioning why she'd ever want to be with you, and outright saying you didn't think you were good enough. She's not talking about herself is she? Yes, "she" was. Apparently my previous post/reply in this thread was even more spot on than I thought it was.
fishtaco Posted October 18, 2011 Posted October 18, 2011 WTF? Not being tall and white just means don't using online dating. That is all. I'm not tall. At 5'10", that's not short, but I missed the most highly sought after height for men by 2 inches. And I'm Asian. I'm stuck in the middle where I'm too white for Asians and too Asian for the round-eyes. And I'm beating statistics by dating mostly Hispanic women (although my current girlfriend is European), because I like Hispanic women. And I've found out, outside of online dating where your Asian-ness gets you dropped automatically by filters, there are enough Latinas that are receptive, if you just go out and do your stuff. Would it be easier if I were a 6 ft tall white guy? Absolutely. When Latinas want to date inter-racially, they usually look for white guys. So if this were a competition to see how many women you can sleep with, white guys win. But I'm not playing that game. If I ever manage to hit 3 digits (extremely unlikely), my penis would probably fall off. I don't need any sort of extreme sexual records. So given that, the "disadvantage" is negligible. Try a bit harder, and you'll get what you want anyway. Unless of course, you are playing the game where whoever dies having the most number of sexual conquers win. But then I think you probably have bigger issues than having a disadvantage compared to white guys. The disadvantage is real, don't get me wrong, but it's not enough to stop you.
Sanman Posted October 18, 2011 Posted October 18, 2011 Hokie, I think you need to stop letting other people get in your head. Decide who you are and be comfortable with that. If I recall, didn't you end up breaking up with a girl you were happy with because your friends said you could do better? I think you need to figure out what YOU want to be happy.
ShannonMI Posted October 18, 2011 Posted October 18, 2011 Is this "I'm not tall and white" thread STILL going? Is there some thread jacking going on or is OP still going on about it? Wow, what more can be said? You aren't tall and you aren't white. Live with it buddy. Someone out there will love you for you;)
Author USMCHokie Posted October 18, 2011 Author Posted October 18, 2011 Is this "I'm not tall and white" thread STILL going? Is there some thread jacking going on or is OP still going on about it? Wow, what more can be said? You aren't tall and you aren't white. Live with it buddy. Someone out there will love you for you;) Hahah, no, the OP is not still going on about it...he gets the point. It's just that a sidebar conversation arose from it and embedded itself in this thread... But thanks. I'm not particularly tall. I'm not white. I'll be fine.
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