lostsoul123 Posted October 15, 2011 Posted October 15, 2011 i keep breaking NC i feel like there is unresolved issues so i keep contacting ...i really want to get this girl off my mind and god know what she had done on my back or been doing !! there always this day that my curiosity kills me and i end up asking her something. not to mention she texted me stuff too and i battle to ignore her. i need an opinion, what is better to make her realize im the love of her life me not contacting her or make imposible to her to contact me what i mean by this is should i block her on fb and change my number or i completely let her know im ok without her keeping my number and her unblocked on fb
sadprincess Posted October 15, 2011 Posted October 15, 2011 hey, i've been breaking NC all the time. but i think i really said some hurtful things to where if i send another text....i'm really known as the psycho ex. i don't know if NC will win an ex back. there are sites that said yes...but there are stories where a lot of people say you have to do NC for the right reason, which is to help YOU heal. there are stories i heard where NC for a month or more....and the ex comes running back. but there are sad stories of people NC for years....and nothing. So you have to expect both. That doesn't help, I know. I feel extremely sad and depressed too, but i come on this site like every hour (i use my computer to study)....to help cope and vent. just keep writing and reading stories from here. you're not alone. and people may want your advice, your stories to help them heal. and when you can help others....you may forget for a short time what you're going thru.
sadprincess Posted October 15, 2011 Posted October 15, 2011 and you don't need to change your number. wasting time and too much trouble. you can block her on fb. knowing you can't see her profile you'll log in less or feel less desire to know what she's doing cuz you can't see her profile anyways. from experience, i know constantly texting/emailing....does NOTHING for me. if anything....drives the person away. I have no experience with NC...but will....so we'll see.
Author lostsoul123 Posted October 15, 2011 Author Posted October 15, 2011 thanks for your reply im not alone as i think i was. is kinda weird i know but i think (and please people let me know what you guys think) but by not bloking her on fb i wonder if she see my profile pic and begin thinking about me.
EgoJoe Posted October 15, 2011 Posted October 15, 2011 The first step to healing is to make the decision to heal. I can, I will, I must etc.
Author lostsoul123 Posted October 15, 2011 Author Posted October 15, 2011 ok but how i heal!! i willing to do it!!
EgoJoe Posted October 15, 2011 Posted October 15, 2011 (edited) You say to yourself. I am not going to speak to my Ex for a long time. I am going to avoid all information on them. I am going to improve myself for myself. I will reflect on the relationship when I can do so in a manner that is not detrimental to my emotional well-being. You read the threads on no-contact and you set a firm boundary if your Ex contacts. Something to the effect of, "I am not interested in being your friend. I am healing and moving on. Take good care of yourself. It's best we don't speak for a long time." After saying something like this (when contacted, there is no need to do this if you have been pushing for contact) it is completely ok and reasonable to ignore any and all contact. It may not even be necessary to do this if they only contact once out of the blue and ignoring them seems to make them get the picture for awhile or forever. The beauty of this is that they will either live in denial or at some point realize that they have lost you and that you are moving on with your life and bettering yourself. Write down twenty-five positive statements of change that start with, "I will, I can, I must." I did this and I read them every morning. I still have rough days and weak moments but I don't break down anymore and I won't be doing that again. I had to ignore my Ex the last time she contacted because I deserve proper correspondence even though I wasn't really trying to reconcile so much as to come to a consensus. In the heat of emotional turmoil this is almost impossible without space to achieve perspective. Now is the time to pick up a self-help book, go back to school, look for a job, look for a better job, hit the gym like a madman, form new dietary habits while your appetite is shot and improve yourself. Let the questions about your breakup sit unanswered for now, I promise you in due time the answers you need will present themselves if you look at the right time. This happened to me, I searched rampantly for answers to psychological situations for months and when I gave up and was looking for communications tactics to improve my sales skills and talk with a very emotionally tapped and stressed out family member I found information that applied to my breakup specifically! I promise that your suffering will not last forever and from this time of pain with the right attitude and perspective you will emerge stronger, healthier, more attractive and wiser! Edited October 15, 2011 by EgoJoe
sadprincess Posted October 15, 2011 Posted October 15, 2011 i feel revengeful. so stuff I say, "advice", may not be "textbook" or the right thing. so please keep that in mind. if you wanna keep your fb so she can see you...then be active and make it seems like you're moving along just fine. I put myself in a dumpers shoes...if i dumped someone and they took it lightly...i'd be kinda embarrassed. its all a game i know, but like i said, i feel revengeful and wanna pay a dumper their dues. strike up a convo with a person hotter than your ex! all girls are jealous!!!!!! whether they admit it or not. i admit it...not proud...but i am.....and if my ex was talking to a hottie online...i'd start feelin rejected (even if I were the dumper). we always compare ourselves to others that share someone in common with. its only natural. some people may think i'm crazy for giving you these mindplaying advice. but again............i feel evilllllllllllll
Author lostsoul123 Posted October 15, 2011 Author Posted October 15, 2011 thank you for sharing your evil side with me jaja what you said about showing them youre moving on and talk with other hotties i did already did it! i will tell you exactly how since i delete her on fb she no longer can see my profile rigth .well monday i was uploading new pics of me and friends and family and put the album to public and i tag people that me and ex have in common !! she obviously saw them and guess what? she commented on them compliment saying'' i love this pic"' but then other female friends(hotties) commented as well saying'' im beatifull and stuff'' ...she in a sarcastic manner click ''like'' on the hotties comment followed up by bloking me i totally ignored that i dint even ask her why she blocked me ......the next morning she send text ''i hate you'' . i ignored that too the next day at 3pm she text me ''when was the last time you cried about love??'' ignored till today i break NC ( asking her why she done that ,if she dont want to be with me !!?? so i tell her if you dont want to be with me and you cant be my friend why you act like otherwise!? i was really angry and mad and to end the conversation i tell her ...dont call dont text and keep living your life
sadprincess Posted October 15, 2011 Posted October 15, 2011 ok, wow so it worked. the whole make ur ex jealous by showing them u moved on. she commented on your pics (to show the world...or your mutual friends...that she's "cool" with it)....yea right...cool my butt! she was totally jelly inside because of her obvious texts the next day. but she wants her cake and eat it too. she won't just flat out tell you she wants this relationship fixed. but she won't leave you alone either. like what does she want????????????? they (dumpers) are so selfish. they want you to miss them, to love them, to be there for them...but its one sided. i'm sorry. keep playing "hard-to-get"....drives people crazy!
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