Anyone have regrets about not giving it 100% during the relationship?

[proteinshake25]

I repeatedly kick myself, and have a hard time forgiving myself for not loving her like I wish I could love her now. I think back to times where she really needed emotional support, and I provided it, but I could've done better. We ended every conversation with I love you, but I could've made it more spontaneous. I have a very demanding job, but now get more hours off, I really regret not spending more time with her, or taking days off to spend with her. All this regret is what hurts the most, if I could get dumped and know I tried 100% it'd be much easier. Just wondering how I move on from this, I wish I could show her.

[TheDovic]

Yes, although I did a lot of practical things i.e. paying the bills, cooking and cleaning etc I forgot I was in a relationship and stopped being romantic or spontaneous.

 

I can't take all the blame because my ex was a disaster, but I still could have done things a little differently. I honestly believe if I had I wouldn't be on LS right now!

[headsashed]

i believe i gave 100% in my relationship so i dont really hurt from that, but i do regret not doing different things,we became routine in everything we did,everyday was the same,but that wasnt only my fault,so i am partly to blame for not getting of my backside and putting more excitement into it,oh well,its too little too late anyway lol,its over with and we have to do our best to move on.

[ken_25]

No I don't. We were together for 3 1/2 years, she cheated on me a little over one month into it and didn't confess until she dumped me. She did not deserve anything better than what I gave her. I was good to her overall, but was never perfect and even if I was, eventually she would of ran anyway.

[M2155]

My answer to your question is a big fat yes.

 

But the only way to learn it I guess was through experience. Honestly even when you know in theory what you should do or how you should respond, there is no teacher like experience. And yes for a while realizing where I was at fault hurt more than him coldly dumping me, because it's something under my control. Each day it get's harder to imagine erasing the memories of the mistakes if we got back in contact, although I remember more good than bad and think he's a good guy in general. I hope one day he realizes that I'm a much better person today than the one he left, because I grew from the pain of that experience. But the reality most likely is that I'm a better person for the next guy. And maybe that's just the way it was meant to be for me.

[stunned8165]

I repeatedly kick myself, and have a hard time forgiving myself for not loving her like I wish I could love her now. I think back to times where she really needed emotional support, and I provided it, but I could've done better. We ended every conversation with I love you, but I could've made it more spontaneous. I have a very demanding job, but now get more hours off, I really regret not spending more time with her, or taking days off to spend with her. All this regret is what hurts the most, if I could get dumped and know I tried 100% it'd be much easier. Just wondering how I move on from this, I wish I could show her.

 

Not me. My last relationship I gave 110%.. Tried to get her to have more date nights even if it was just her and I, a bottle of wine locked in the bedroom. She had two kids... Tried to get her to go to the beach for a sunset with the kids, wanted her to make an effort in finding a baby sitter, always told her how pretty she was, how I loved her. But it was like talking to no one.

 

Read my story..

 

http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t302201/

[steve566]

This is the thing i regret the most, my girlfriend gave her whole self to me in every way but for some reason i couldnt give her more than maybe 75% of myself. I feel like i let demons from past relationships get in the way of our relationship and now 2 years later i've lost her for good. I guess the only good that will come from this is now i know that if im not in it with my whole heart that it wont work so this is something i will have to work on before i move on with someone else. Its tough though because i feel like i'll never find someone that was as compatible with me as my ex was...

[Glove_slap]

I'm sure everyone does to a certain extent. Even dumpers.

[M2155]

for some reason i couldnt give her more than maybe 75% of myself. I feel like i let demons from past relationships get in the way of our relationship

 

That happens a lot I think. It's a hard lesson but good that you are able to see that. I can now see that my ex didn't give me 100% (and I'm not sure I did either as a result).

[jenjen83]

I think I gave 100 percent and maybe in fact tried too hard. My ex said I was a good girlfriend to him and there was nothing I could have done different. I don't know if he just said that to make me feel better but I really can't think of much I'd do differently.

[mike588]

I repeatedly kick myself, and have a hard time forgiving myself for not loving her like I wish I could love her now. I think back to times where she really needed emotional support, and I provided it, but I could've done better. We ended every conversation with I love you, but I could've made it more spontaneous. I have a very demanding job, but now get more hours off, I really regret not spending more time with her, or taking days off to spend with her. All this regret is what hurts the most, if I could get dumped and know I tried 100% it'd be much easier. Just wondering how I move on from this, I wish I could show her.

 

Don't feel bad. I gave my now ex. g/f 110% without being a door mat but she still dumped me. Maybe if I only gave her 50% she would still be around?

 

Forgive yourself,, learn from your mistake/s and move on.

[redblack66]

Don't feel bad. I gave my now ex. g/f 110% without being a door mat but she still dumped me. Maybe if I only gave her 50% she would still be around?

 

Forgive yourself,, learn from your mistake/s and move on.

 

I believe the 50% and being around. The person has to be really high up understanding love, relationships, etc. to appreciate 100%. I have not met such a woman, and I have been around a lot. Don't give 100%. You will be dumped for sure.