mopar crazy Posted October 14, 2011 Posted October 14, 2011 I posted a thread several months back that my brother and sil never give my kids anything for their bday, not even a card, but every year she has a party for her own three children and expects ppl to come with a gift. My nephews 9th bday I called to wish him a Happy Birthday as I didn't know if I would be able to go to his party. He tells me thanks and then said "Have you gotten me my bday present yet?" See? He expects one. FF to a few weeks later, my dd's 16th. My sil gives her a $10 GC to a convienant store? WTF? She doesn't have a car so she uses it on candy. I told my sil not to get her anything in the first place. I told her she never gave my ds anything for his 16th so she shouldn't give to dd. She said she did. I KNOW she did not! So, my ds was upset she got something and his aunt didn't get him anything for his 16th. FF to yesterday. Ds 18th bday, a milestone. What does she do? She sends him a TEXT wishing him a Happy Bday! A TEXT? WTF? I'm so done with giving her kids anything! Two wrongs don't make a right but my niece bday is in a few weeks. Guess what she is getting? A Happy Birthday text! I have shelled out a lot of money to her kids over the last 18 years (her oldest) and my kids haven't received anything in over 10 years (well besides that $10 GC to a conv. store) I'm done! It's not her kids fault but IDC anymore! I live pay check to pay check, we are not well off financially, they are. WWYD in this situation?
Nikki82 Posted October 15, 2011 Posted October 15, 2011 Sounds like you should have put your foot down years ago.
Keridan Posted October 15, 2011 Posted October 15, 2011 I can't tell. Did you confront her about this or, depending on your dynamic, ask your husband to? I personally wouldn't take it out on her kids. I'm more of a fan of the direct approach. I would suggest talking to her and explaining how hard it is for you to come up with gifts and it hurts your feelings not to have the same effort and thought shown to your children.
Author mopar crazy Posted October 15, 2011 Author Posted October 15, 2011 Nikki, I mentioned something to her several months ago (around my dd's 16th bday) that I'm really feeling the pinch of her having bday parties every year for her children and close friends of ours. She said in a snotty tone "Just do what you can do." WHAT? So, if I can't afford anything that is all I can do? I know damn well if I showed up with just a card and everyone else brought a gift she would look down her nose at me. It's the way she is. I forgot to mention that she gives gifts to her friends children for their bday's. Several times I have her heard her say to the child's parent: "(child's name) gifts in the house if they want to get it." or "What does (child's name) want for their bday this year?" So, she gives to friends children's, but not mine, and yet she expects me to give to her children and our friends when she throws them a party. She not only has bday parties for her children every year but for my brother. So, I'm buying for five ppl, plus any friends parties that she decides to throw a party for. If she has anything for my neice this month I will go, and bring a gift. But, starting next year, I'm telling my sil that I'm not longer going to be giving gifts anymore. I'm just going to tell her that I don't expect her to give gifts to my children but I don't feel it's fair if I give all the time when she does nothing. This is going to cause some family issues but that is fine, let her be a bitch and ruin our relationship over this. No skin off my back.
january2011 Posted October 15, 2011 Posted October 15, 2011 Don't go to her parties. Speak to your brother. I suspect that she will complain about you regardless so it's probably better to choose a plan of action that makes you happy rather than something that makes her happy.
Author mopar crazy Posted October 22, 2011 Author Posted October 22, 2011 Thanks~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Huh? Care to elaborate on that? No? Didn't think so! You just joined, have one post and that is that is to my thread out of hundreds of them on LS. I'm not stupid!
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