either just took a massive step towards moving on one a few back

[k100danny]

So ive been split up from my ex almost 2 months, we tried to stay in contact at first and be friends straight away which clearly didnt work. we spoke then fell out then spoke then fell out ect.

 

Anyway we were close friends before maybe we did have an attraction to each other but we talked about everything from girls i liked to her ex ect and everything was cool. Anyway ive cleary being going over the relationship in my mind because i didnt feel i had closure, we were a good match and i blamed my anxious attachment pushing her away but it took a while to realise that a lot of my anxiety was because i felt she wasnt ready for a relationship after a long one only being finished a year or so and her really being busy. it became clear i wanted a lot more than she could give at the time and this made me anxious.

 

so today i text her and we meet for coffee, we did mention the relationship and i think i finally got everything straight in my mind about why it didnt work ect. we didnt dwell on it and it was nice to have a catch up, we chatted and made jokes ect just like before when we were friends. Now i dont know if this has helped me in the getting over her process or not, i suppose only time will tell. I was hoping to see her and feel nothing and maybe think what the hell was i thinking but i didnt feel that, i remembered why i liked her but also why it couldnt work aswell. i was still attracted to her but didnt feel as bad as i thought i would. We probably wont stay in close contact like we did before but maybe meet up every couple of months for a coffee and a catch up. and once all feelings are gone we can MAYBE be true friends again. I hope i havent made a big mistake in seeing her and put myself back.

 

Anyone else have experiences like this? if so how did it go?

[Zabs]

I couldn't be friends with my ex--ever...I fancy him too much and vice versa...

 

If the chemistry between you has gone...perhaps...but that will be a long time coming. The things you like about each other are still there...but it's the things that don't..which sometimes preside...

 

Zabs xx

[k100danny]

Definitely just took a huge step backward. although i thought she may have been with someone wince we split we text a couple of times after saying was nice to see you ect hope we can be true friends in the future and then i made a comment about i should just get over it now because it could never be the same after she had been with someone else. I know i shouldnt have said this and i obviously have some feelings or i wouldnt have said it. she replied with who said i have been with someone else anyway!! and we both know that we dont have to explain ourselves to each other as its none of each others business. and said she hoped we could be friends again soon. now im taking that as she has slept with someone else wether that is true or not i dont know? She did say while we were having coffee that she wasnt ready for a relationship and she sees that now and says she still isnt ready. so if she has im sure she isnt in a relationship but its still set my mind going and made my stomach pang.

 

dont try and be friends with the ex people until youve moved on totally!!!