AmericanHoney Posted October 12, 2011 Posted October 12, 2011 I've been seeing this guy for awhile and things are going great he has been more attentive,etc,etc however yesterday he did something out of character. He set up his facebook so I cannot see his posts,likes,pics,etc which concerns me because I am afraid he is hiding something. I would bring it up but I do not want to come off as the obsessive girlfriend so what should I do?? I do not think he is hiding anything from me but it just seems a little odd all of a sudden everything is hidden now when in the past it wasn't.
Pasttense Posted October 12, 2011 Posted October 12, 2011 I think that it is quite possible that it was inadvertent (there are several complicated privacy settings on Facebook apparently....). So you might ask him about in that context.
Author AmericanHoney Posted October 13, 2011 Author Posted October 13, 2011 I hope so. The last photo he posted was of the beach and I know he can go to the beach whenever he pleases but it still has me paranoid did he go with another girl?? Did he go by himself?? That was the last photo he posted and now all of his photos are gone including that one. I know I shouldn't be paranoid but when he goes to the beach and didn't tell me and posts it on his facebook and later disappears I do get paranoid and I cannot ask him about it or it will come off as paranoid and not being able to trust him and not allowing him to go to places.
st11 Posted October 13, 2011 Posted October 13, 2011 And this is why my girlfriend and I aren't friends on facebook. To many problems like this. If you trust each other who cares about it. If you don't trust him maybe you should question the relationship you two have.
CJ B-Boy Posted October 13, 2011 Posted October 13, 2011 Hi ladies. I thought i'd give you a guys perspective on this. Facebook is such a great thing bit for relationships it can be terrible! If his posts are on private it may not be that he has anything to hide it might just be he is not ready for you to see that part of his life yet. I have got pictures and friends on my Facebook profile that portray in a totally different way to the person that I actually am. He might not want to crush the picture you currently have painted of him by seeing a distasteful pic/post on his fb. He may have platonic female friends who regularly comment on his profile and he might not know how you would react if you saw them. We (men) aren't all deceitful pigs! lol sometimes there is a perfectly logical explanation behind our actions. I would say just sit him down and have a grown up discussion about it in an environment where he doesn't feel pressured. Good luck
Eclypse Posted October 13, 2011 Posted October 13, 2011 And this is why my girlfriend and I aren't friends on facebook. To many problems like this. If you trust each other who cares about it. If you don't trust him maybe you should question the relationship you two have. Of course you should be FB friends with your spouse. You are meant to have a special bond and your lives should be shared. I suppose this is all depending on commitment levels though. OP it's not a good sign that he suddenly changed his privacy settings for you. There's only one reason he would do that and that's to hide something. It's up to you find out what that is. Maybe he got drunk really bad and didn't want you to see the pics? Or maybe he got photographed kissing another girl (worst case scenario).
CJ B-Boy Posted October 13, 2011 Posted October 13, 2011 OP it's not a good sign that he suddenly changed his privacy settings for you. There's only one reason he would do that and that's to hide something. It's up to you find out what that is. Maybe he got drunk really bad and didn't want you to see the pics? Or maybe he got photographed kissing another girl (worst case scenario). I agree that this could be a scenario however the thing is Posts/pics can easily be blown out of context. An pic of a female friend of mine giving me an innocent peck on the cheek at a friends party was interpreted by my ex as me and her having a full blown affair. That's why now I don't like being friends with my GF. Not because I have something to hide but because things get blown out of context on FB.
st11 Posted October 13, 2011 Posted October 13, 2011 Of course you should be FB friends with your spouse. You are meant to have a special bond and your lives should be shared. I suppose this is all depending on commitment levels though. We are around each other all the time and share everything together. Us not being friends gives just enough of that personal space everyone needs lol.
Author AmericanHoney Posted October 13, 2011 Author Posted October 13, 2011 I guess you are right. I guess FB can complicate things and been taken out of context like you said. Some girls ( myself included) get jealous over idiotic things like having an arm around someone or writing on someone's wall and we get upset I guess maybe it is a good thing he set it up that way so no jealousy can happen. I guess that is one bad thing about being friends with a BF or even a husband being friends with a wife on FB too many things get taken out of context. Thanks guys for pointing that out:bunny: I know one guy who refuses to have his photo taken at all because he is paranoid his wife will take it out of context.
st11 Posted October 13, 2011 Posted October 13, 2011 I guess you are right. I guess FB can complicate things and been taken out of context like you said. Some girls ( myself included) get jealous over idiotic things like having an arm around someone or writing on someone's wall and we get upset I guess maybe it is a good thing he set it up that way so no jealousy can happen. I guess that is one bad thing about being friends with a BF or even a husband being friends with a wife on FB too many things get taken out of context. Thanks guys for pointing that out:bunny: I know one guy who refuses to have his photo taken at all because he is paranoid his wife will take it out of context. I would still talk to him about it though (not in an accusative way), because it was kind of rude to have full access to his page one day and not the next. I feel he should have at least mentioned it to you.
zengirl Posted October 13, 2011 Posted October 13, 2011 Maybe it's a styles thing, but I would NEVER date someone who wanted so much space and distant that he couldn't even be my friend on FB (assuming he had and used it).
Author AmericanHoney Posted October 13, 2011 Author Posted October 13, 2011 My sister forgot to log off on her facebook so just for the heck of it I checked his page and he posted stuff! Nothing earth shattering or anything one thing he posted was love this weather! Next one was I am so happy this morning! Like I said nothing earth shattering and underneath it said shared with Kyle's friends of friends. I guess I am not his friend or he has it hidden so I cannot see?? I am really annoyed right now and of course I can't bring it up or he would call me stalker.
dispatch3d Posted October 13, 2011 Posted October 13, 2011 And this is why my girlfriend and I aren't friends on facebook. To many problems like this. If you trust each other who cares about it. If you don't trust him maybe you should question the relationship you two have. ahhh facebook isn't the issue here.
Onlyjonley Posted October 13, 2011 Posted October 13, 2011 Whhhhaaaa? You have every right to know. I'm all for giving my significant other space and privacy but when it comes to something like that, you have a right to know. Stop being afraid you're going to step on his toes. It's important to be upfront with your significant other.
Author AmericanHoney Posted October 13, 2011 Author Posted October 13, 2011 He blocked me. Just for fun I switched things around and blocked my cousin and then posted something and she couldn't see my posts. So yes he blocked me from seeing his news feeds how nice..... I can't bring it up of course but needless to say I am fuming!
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