StellaA Posted October 12, 2011 Posted October 12, 2011 My ex who dumped me wants me back. I gave him space, and now he says he is sorry. I am not sure what to do as I love him but my head tells me not to go back. My family have all said they would not welcome him back so it would be tough. Is he going to break my heart again, do I avoid the chance
geegirl Posted October 12, 2011 Posted October 12, 2011 (edited) What were his reasons for leaving? No one can predict the outcome of whether your bf is legitimate or not. If your head (instincts) are telling you something, LISTEN. It's waving the red flag for a reason. Don't read so much into his words. Saying sorry is easy. Words are cheap, infact they are free. Reflect on his actions. That is what you should be focused on. Give yourself all the time you need, and if he is still there, go slow. He has to show you. You go at your pace. No one can tell you if it will pan out for the best. These things are always a gamble. Edited October 12, 2011 by geegirl
Zabs Posted October 12, 2011 Posted October 12, 2011 Our Stella! I can't keep up with you...is this your current thread? If it is...what exactly is he sorry about...ooh a little deja vu for me there! LOL I think I wrote that an another one of your ...so what be banal and repeat Zx
Buttercup84 Posted October 12, 2011 Posted October 12, 2011 What were his reasons for leaving? No one can predict the outcome of whether your bf is legitimate or not. If your head (instincts) are telling you something, LISTEN. It's waving the red flag for a reason. Don't read so much into his words. Saying sorry is easy. Words are cheap, infact they are free. Reflect on his actions. That is what you should be focused on. Give yourself all the time you need, and if he is still there, go slow. He has to show you. You go at your pace. No one can tell you if it will pan out for the best. These things are always a gamble. I agree with Geegirl , you never know what will happen.But he dumped you and you even went on antidepressants because of him. And as Gee said , words are cheap. Actions speak louder , he can be sorry but if he does not work to make this work again , there is no use. Be careful that he does not just feel alone and sad . Don't go running back he has to chase you. I hope it works out for you though ! xxx
Author StellaA Posted October 12, 2011 Author Posted October 12, 2011 Thanks guys, yeah, I want to be sure he is not just lonely! so have told him I am going away for a few weeks and need time and space. How do you think he can prove he is not just lonely?
TheDovic Posted October 12, 2011 Posted October 12, 2011 Fortune favours the brave Stella! We all know you love this guy, but you'll never know what the outcome's going to be unless you give him a chance!!!
EgoJoe Posted October 12, 2011 Posted October 12, 2011 I gave you advice on what to do in your other thread.
geegirl Posted October 12, 2011 Posted October 12, 2011 You will never be able to prove his intent. He may be sweet as pie until you're his again and repeat his behavior. Or he may bolt because he's tired of waiting. Or he may be legitimate in his need to really want to work at it with you. It's a chance you have to take. Just remember reflect on his actions from the past. Breaking up with you and just saying he did a stupid thing is a very poor and baseless reason to just up and go.
SoulFinger Posted October 12, 2011 Posted October 12, 2011 Stella, There is only one way of finding out and that is either you try it or you don't that is if you don't want to live with the what if's. Anyway, if you do give him another chance then go easy,slow and you control the situation.Good luck girl:)
M2155 Posted October 12, 2011 Posted October 12, 2011 You never know but you sound very unsure and to get with someone when you have so many doubts and little voices warning you, that says a lot. If this was unquestionably the person you wanted to be with, I wonder if you wouldn't be happy (instead of sick, sleepless) and not caring what other people have to say about it. It sounds like you want someone to validate your decision and reassure you. Hypothetically if my ex came back around and I still even liked him, I would not take him back immediately. I would date him. I would not be exclusive, sleep with him, etc... I would only allow him to go out with me when I was available and see how hard he pursues me- maybe 2 months. I am not sure that would be easy (words are cheap:p) but I would not just hand over what he wants after "I'm sorry. I want you back." Why he wants me back would be something I'm curious about too. If he's just lonely, he won't chase long, he'll go for someone easier. The ex is "easy" because you've already been together.
Author StellaA Posted October 12, 2011 Author Posted October 12, 2011 Thanks for the advice guys! I guess in the end I will have to be brave whatever decision I make! I told him time and space, distance will do us both good and if it' meant to be it will happen! I do want to be with him but it would be a gamble!
69ways Posted October 12, 2011 Posted October 12, 2011 Thanks for the advice guys! I guess in the end I will have to be brave whatever decision I make! I told him time and space, distance will do us both good and if it' meant to be it will happen! I do want to be with him but it would be a gamble! Life is a gamble as it will be with your next guy
Recommended Posts