Tellmeursecrets5 Posted October 11, 2011 Posted October 11, 2011 And being kissed and held and caressed! Damn I feel like my sex life is completely over! I've been married 3 yrs and yes we've talked About and he promises to try but quite Honestly he just isn't affectionate anymore I'm an attractive woman, who has men flirting And hitting on me regularly but I don't want to Betray my husband. He just not a sexual person and when we do have Sex it's all about him and usually over within minutes So that I now feel like I'm just a warm body for him to Stick his penis in.. I'm so frustrated...
CarrieT Posted October 11, 2011 Posted October 11, 2011 Sounds like you are not going to be married very long if this is how it is going... I'm sorry for you - there is nothing worse than being attached to someone with an entirely different sex drive. If you can't talk through the issues now and you are thinking of cheating, then you are halfway through with your relationship and should probably just move one before hurting him more with an affair.
ptp Posted October 12, 2011 Posted October 12, 2011 As a guy, I am a marriage phobe for mainly this type of problem. My question to you is what was it like before marriage? How did you end up marrying someone who is like this or did it change drastically after you got married?
mike111 Posted October 12, 2011 Posted October 12, 2011 I'm so frustrated... Has he always been this way? Was there more affection when you first met? And good for you and not going out and having an affair. But sex, for most of us, I think, is a real physical need, so is hugging and holding each other. If he can't, or won't, do that, it might be time to move on. mike
Author Tellmeursecrets5 Posted October 12, 2011 Author Posted October 12, 2011 As a guy, I am a marriage phobe for mainly this type of problem. My question to you is what was it like before marriage? How did you end up marrying someone who is like this or did it change drastically after you got married? Thanks for your comments! I totally understand the marriage Phoebe thing. I was also and then my H and I met. We used to be affectionate and cuddled at night. It didn't Change right away after we were married it was more like a slow Progression. Or I guess I should say regression Either way That part of the intimacy is gone and now I feel like I'm just Here for him to take from. You know do the laundry, cook the Dinner and about once every two weeks he rolls over has sex With me until he gets his and then rolls back over and goes to Sleep.
Author Tellmeursecrets5 Posted October 12, 2011 Author Posted October 12, 2011 Sounds like you are not going to be married very long if this is how it is going... Thanks for reading! I don't want that to be the case. I guess I am just trying to Reconcile all this in my head you know. I don't want to end up being one of those women that are angry because of the Lack of connection. As far as the cheating goes I wouldn't do that. The outside attention actually just me reminds me of how good it used to feel and inevitably makes me more frustrated...
Author Tellmeursecrets5 Posted October 12, 2011 Author Posted October 12, 2011 Has he always been this way? Was there more affection when you first met? No, he hasn't always been this way. . That's what is frustrating the most. I k ow it's in there somewhere... And good for you and not going out and having an affair. But sex, for most of us, I think, is a real physical need, so is hugging and holding each other. If he can't, or won't, do that, it might be time to move on. Sex is very important and I think I speak for most women,maybe not all, when I say it's also the emotional aspect that's associated with it. Which is probably why I ended up on here lol! Trying to fill that void I guess and looking for safe alternatives.
ptp Posted October 12, 2011 Posted October 12, 2011 Thanks for your comments! I totally understand the marriage Phoebe thing. I was also and then my H and I met. We used to be affectionate and cuddled at night. It didn't Change right away after we were married it was more like a slow Progression. Or I guess I should say regression Either way That part of the intimacy is gone and now I feel like I'm just Here for him to take from. You know do the laundry, cook the Dinner and about once every two weeks he rolls over has sex With me until he gets his and then rolls back over and goes to Sleep. That really sucks. Never been married so can't say I know how it feels. However, the closest thing to this that I have experienced was when I was wanted to date a friend of mine and she never wanted to date me. No matter how hard I tried, I couldn't get her to like me and feeling that I was not good enough for her in the end was too painful. So I just pulled away. Bottom line: regardless of how nice you are, or what you do for another person you can't make them feel something for you.
mike111 Posted October 12, 2011 Posted October 12, 2011 Sex is very important and I think I speak for most women,maybe not all, when I say it's also the emotional aspect that's associated with it. Which is probably why I ended up on here lol! Trying to fill that void I guess and looking for safe alternatives. Safe alternatives are good. Be sure it's something that will allow you to keep your dignity and self-respect intact mike
Author Tellmeursecrets5 Posted October 12, 2011 Author Posted October 12, 2011 That really sucks. Never been married so can't say I know how it feels. However, the closest thing to this that I have experienced was when I was wanted to date a friend of mine and she never wanted to date me. No matter how hard I tried, I couldn't get her to like me and feeling that I was not good enough for her in the end was too painful. So I just pulled away. Bottom line: regardless of how nice you are, or what you do for another person you can't make them feel something for you. Well believe it or not it's much the same thing. The person you expect to reject you is the one you commit yourself too.
Author Tellmeursecrets5 Posted October 12, 2011 Author Posted October 12, 2011 Safe alternatives are good. Be sure it's something that will allow you to keep your dignity and self-respect intact mike Thanks Mike! And those are two things I hold dear!! It's actually just comforting to talk and know I'm not the only person experiencing this. I've only been married once before and i was super young. I really don't have very good examples if what a marriage is supposed to be like. So I'm blindly trying to figure it out.
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