orion9000 Posted October 11, 2011 Posted October 11, 2011 hey so here's my story, i dated this girl for about 3 months and we became fairly close. she invited me to her parent's house. we were both transitioning to life out on the west coast, and so we didn't have sex at the beginning, preferring instead to wait to get out here before we started anything. she had also gotten out of a bad relationship six months before, and wanted to wait until a new location to start something. at any rate, we got out here and were very into each other and slept together during a vacation weekend. we had good sex the first two times. From that point on we stayed over each other's places and the sex actually didn't get better, in fact it kind of got worse, but i was too chicken to say anything thinking it would show insecurity and that it would just get better. i always finished, and we always had sex. it was a time issue. it just was erratic, lots of positions, but she never finished and never really seemed to get fully into it. less than a week and a half after moving out here, she basically called things off, telling me straight after some pushing that she wasn't sure why things changed so quickly, maybe it was the transition, maybe she was just trying to force a relationship because she was sick of being alone, but she was sure she didn't want to be my girlfriend and didn't want to have sex with me. she wasn't sure why, and reiterated many times it wasn't anything i did. prior to sex though, we had very good physical chemistry, she was all over me. is bad sex for one week enough for a woman to call it quits? isnt this something that if she really liked me she'd at least talk about or address? or is it something where its kind of like you either have it or you don't? i feel like i did everything right, except i couldnt get this one part down, and am pretty depressed/unsure of myself now. i think back and wish i took it slower, or wish i asked her about what she wanted to make her feel more comfortable/into it. i feel like i let one get away simply because i just wanst focused enough, but i sort of thought i had more time before calling it off. can anyone help? what are people's sex experiences like? ive gotten good reviews from past girlfriends and hookups, just not sure why it didnt work out this time and why she bailed so quickly/what changed. i hope its not just the sex. thanks for any help.
Space Ritual Posted October 11, 2011 Posted October 11, 2011 You really thought you let one get away? lol...look just pick yourself up, dust yourself off and go meet some new women. You got a glimpse of what a long term relationship would have been like with her...i.e. if she dumped you over this and this soon she would have eventually anyway or cheated on you and then may or may not have dumped you. Then how would you have felt? She did you a favor....
geegirl Posted October 11, 2011 Posted October 11, 2011 Personally, if I saw potential in someone romantically and emotionally, it would trump bad sex. You can overcome bad sex if two people want to get good at it for each other and with the added bonus of an emotional attachment, it's workable. I have a feeling she was finding an excuse and this was her so called get out of jail free card.
Zabs Posted October 11, 2011 Posted October 11, 2011 Hmm... I have had bad sex before but the reason it was bad is because I wasn't really into him...there wasn't the 'spark' that is required to commit to a full on relationship so I just told him we weren't compatible. Zabs xx
Author orion9000 Posted October 11, 2011 Author Posted October 11, 2011 i appreciate it, just broke off an engagement a year ago, and still figuring out this whole dating thing again. not sure what's up or down really, and this one was the first one i felt something for since the break up. guess i need to work on my judgment a little better! best to you all.
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