Damn kid, am I prejudiced?

[ShannonMI]

Yeah, that's what kind of bothers me. I never was like this until I moved to South Florida. Most of the Black population out here....smh. Even my father, a proud Black Man says since coming out here he doesn't claim his own people anymore. They're just so crazy and ignorant out here. A demeanor looked down on by all people of all colors, creeds, and ages.

Here's another question for you to consider. You say your father is a black man. So what do you think about your mother? She dated or possibly married? (don't know which) a black man. She had sex with him and conceived a mixed child: YOU. How does that make you feel? Do you have a good relationship with her?

[mr.dream merchant]

Here's another question for you to consider. You say your father is a black man. So what do you think about your mother? She dated or possibly married? (don't know which) a black man. She had sex with him and conceived a mixed child: YOU. How does that make you feel? Do you have a good relationship with her?

 

I don't know. She's my mom. We bump heads alot though. It made me wonder if she was one of those girls who always ****ed Black Dudes though. I hope not.

[thatone]

It can't possibly be the former. For one, I steal all of their women. Two, physically (all the stereotypes about Black Men) I have, minus the scrawny legs. I have a proportionate body. Lean Muscular build 214 lbs with a nice sized piece of equipment. So there honestly isn't any intimidation whatsoever.

 

I honestly look down on Black People out here in South Florida. Just their whole situation. Poor, uneducated, very ignorant and close minded. It's crazy. So for a woman to find that attractive at all, is just a turn off in itself. There's some who aren't poor nor uneducated, but still act ghetto, classless, ignorant, and uneducated. It's just not a good look. And when I see a lovely non-black woman with that guy, I think to myself, wow, what could she possibly find attractive about this guy's demeanor alone, we're not even talking physical appearance..

 

Mind you I'm not grouping ALL Africans. There's just a certain demographic out here in South FL.

 

it's the south, it's not the race.

 

those ghetto black guys in the south are no different than the white rednecks in the south. it's a costume, a gimmick. they have no prospects so they have to get pride from somewhere, they get it from isolating themselves from the normal world.

 

it's a symptom of a feudal society that never really died. there are the haves and the have nots. there's little in between. nothing much has changed since the plantation days in most of the south.

[xoxoDaniellexoxo]

I think it sometimes is where you live that determines what is "acceptable" in the dating world. I grew up in a suburb outside of chicago where, I don't mean this is a rude way, no matter what race you were we all acted the same. Like what you said about the ladies where you grew up the guys and girls where I grew up were educated and always polite. Most the kids I grew up with too weren't from a bad area, or what some deam the "ghetto". One of my best guy friends had a white mother and an african american father and we "dated" in 8th grade which dosn't really count, but the area I grew up in no one really cared, in fact a lot of kids in my school were some mix of races be in white and asian, or latino and asian it wasn't taboo. I think it depends on the TYPE of person she dated before not the race, because she could have dated someone like Denzel not some random drug dealer, but I can understand the "stigma" attached when I woman says she likes colored men, sorry for my rant. Hope it helps some!

[mr.dream merchant]

it's the south, it's not the race.

 

those ghetto black guys in the south are no different than the white rednecks in the south. it's a costume, a gimmick. they have no prospects so they have to get pride from somewhere, they get it from isolating themselves from the normal world.

 

it's a symptom of a feudal society that never really died. there are the haves and the have nots. there's little in between. nothing much has changed since the plantation days in most of the south.

 

This is what my father, brother and I all agreed to. It has to be the South.

[mr.dream merchant]

I have no comment on whether you are 'prejudiced', but I will say that you are an unfortunate product of interracial relationships and walking proof of why they are a bad idea. You are a mixture of so many ethnicities, you have no identity of your own. You can't relate to either blacks, indians or natives.

 

 

I feel this way to. I don't look black enough to be black. But I don't speak enough Spanish to be a Latino. I'm not big into the Indian culture enough to be Indian either. And Native American? Forget it.

 

Just a tri-racial guy with a latin background.

[AHardDaysNight]

It sounds like you hate yourself, and that is being projected into a hatred of your race.

[thatone]

I think it sometimes is where you live that determines what is "acceptable" in the dating world. I grew up in a suburb outside of chicago where, I don't mean this is a rude way, no matter what race you were we all acted the same. Like what you said about the ladies where you grew up the guys and girls where I grew up were educated and always polite. Most the kids I grew up with too weren't from a bad area, or what some deam the "ghetto". One of my best guy friends had a white mother and an african american father and we "dated" in 8th grade which dosn't really count, but the area I grew up in no one really cared, in fact a lot of kids in my school were some mix of races be in white and asian, or latino and asian it wasn't taboo. I think it depends on the TYPE of person she dated before not the race, because she could have dated someone like Denzel not some random drug dealer, but I can understand the "stigma" attached when I woman says she likes colored men, sorry for my rant. Hope it helps some!

 

that's just how people are in the midwest, because everyone is an immigrant. even if their families are from another area of the US, they're not many generations in the midwest for the most part. their ancestors moved there for work. the midwest didn't have an identity before chicago and st louis and other such cities grew up.

 

the south has that plantation identity going back to even before the USA existed, when the areas were european colonies. there were the haves and have nots. the haves had it all, the have nots had enough not to starve.

 

and yes, it's ignorance. stupid white people in the south who try to identify with the pre-civil war south don't understand that middle class whites were moving to the midwest territories to ESCAPE the south well before the civil war. they're stupid, after all.

 

stupid black people in the south don't understand that they're not 'getting over on the white guy' anymore. the white guy doesn't care about them. the civil rights movement is over, but that was the only victory they ever had so they hold on to it.

[ShannonMI]

I don't know. She's my mom. We bump heads alot though. It made me wonder if she was one of those girls who always ****ed Black Dudes though. I hope not.

So you don't have a good relationship with her? That may be your problem. Maybe because of your sh*tty relationship with her, you hate women that date black men? I'm psycho analyzing you. Hahahahaha hope you don't mind:laugh:

[thatone]

addition to the above, fwiw texas is also like the midwest in many ways. there aren't a lot of natives, most of the population of texas moved there for work either in the current generation or just a generation or two ago.

[xoxoDaniellexoxo]

that's just how people are in the midwest, because everyone is an immigrant. even if their families are from another area of the US, they're not many generations in the midwest for the most part. their ancestors moved there for work. the midwest didn't have an identity before chicago and st louis and other such cities grew up.

 

the south has that plantation identity going back to even before the USA existed, when the areas were european colonies. there were the haves and have nots. the haves had it all, the have nots had enough not to starve.

 

and yes, it's ignorance. stupid white people in the south who try to identify with the pre-civil war south don't understand that middle class whites were moving to the midwest territories to ESCAPE the south well before the civil war. they're stupid, after all.

 

stupid black people in the south don't understand that they're not 'getting over on the white guy' anymore. the white guy doesn't care about them. the civil rights movement is over, but that was the only victory they ever had so they hold on to it.

 

I did think about the location too! Sometimes the location really does change norms and taboos that each area has. I do like that sometimes, NOT ALL THE TIME, the northern part of the country can be more open minded about a lot of things. I am glad that I grew up with lots of diversity and was around SOO many different people. One friend from high school moved from Europe and it was crazy how the first couple months she really was confused by class schedules and the amount of technology. She even taught me some Lithwanian but not enough to ever get by!

[ShannonMI]

I did think about the location too! Sometimes the location really does change norms and taboos that each area has. I do like that sometimes, NOT ALL THE TIME, the northern part of the country can be more open minded about a lot of things. I am glad that I grew up with lots of diversity and was around SOO many different people. One friend from high school moved from Europe and it was crazy how the first couple months she really was confused by class schedules and the amount of technology. She even taught me some Lithwanian but not enough to ever get by!

But he's also said that if a woman dated a EDUCATED, NON-GHETTO black guy, he still wouldn't like it. So what gives?

[xoxoDaniellexoxo]

But he's also said that if a woman dated a EDUCATED, NON-GHETTO black guy, he still wouldn't like it. So what gives?

 

Then as for that I cannot be a judge because I don't know everything about him and am not a therapist. Sorry I couldn't be more helpful.

[mr.dream merchant]

But he's also said that if a woman dated a EDUCATED, NON-GHETTO black guy, he still wouldn't like it. So what gives?

 

Maybe subconciously, I assume them to all be ghetto and ignorant, since that's all I usually see out here. And no, I don't hate my mom lol.

[ShannonMI]

Maybe subconciously, I assume them to all be ghetto and ignorant, since that's all I usually see out here. And no, I don't hate my mom lol.

Before you moved to South FL did you feel this way? Or is this a new thing for you?

[mr.dream merchant]

Before South FL I didn't care at all lol. I actually dated more Black Women back then than I do now (which is none). I'm pretty sure it's just the South.

[thatone]

Maybe subconciously, I assume them to all be ghetto and ignorant, since that's all I usually see out here. And no, I don't hate my mom lol.

 

you have stumbled across why the south is what it is .

 

fwiw i don't really judge your opinion (contradiction? hah!) i've lived here my whole life. that's why i can't live in the rural south, i've always stuck to the cities.

 

one of few people i keep in touch with from my last job in my mid 20s was a black guy from chicago. he couldn't handle it either, he left for dallas. he found, as most folks who come from the midwest do, that texas is as close as they can get to the culture they left behind.

 

i lived in little rock for several years due to the hurricane, but am originally from nola and am on my way back as soon as my house sells. nola is different in that it has its own white culture that doesn't really fit with any other part of the south, but much of the black culture is the same. as for the rest of the south? i wouldn't care if it all burned to the ground, except for the loss of football season.

[ShannonMI]

Before South FL I didn't care at all lol. I actually dated more Black Women back then than I do now (which is none). I'm pretty sure it's just the South.

Oh ok! Well theres your answer. I can totally understand why you feel that way then.

[OliveOyl]

You've hit the nail on the head.

 

This is what a lot of people don't realise when mixing is that their children will struggle to find an identity. One of the reasons I will never have mixed race children.

 

It doesn't have to do with mixing races. It has to do with mixing cultures, as well as maturity. If you base your identity solely around other people and aren't strong enough to create your own self-identity, sure it will be a problem. But this isn't really a racial problem.

[Mme. Chaucer]

I really think you need to work on getting past your own racism. It's not acceptable or cool in any way to be a racist, no matter what the color of your own skin is.

 

I remember when you posted pictures of yourself, and you appeared to be a Black man to me. It's sad if you despise any woman who would deign to date you. You've often expressed that you feel that way. This is the first time, though, that you've attributed it to your hatred of your own race.

 

It's sad.

[Lionblade]

mr.dream merchant, you remind me of Unckle Ruckus from Boondocks .

 

 

 

[OliveOyl]

Well it seems only biracial/tri-racial people have this problem. I don't see pure bred people having this problem. I'm white and I identify with white culture. I'm thankful that I'm made up of only one race.

 

Identity problems are not limited to multi-racial people. It's just that if one is multi-racial, that's an easy thing to blame one's lack of identity/esteem problems on. Lots of people feel they don't "fit in." But if you're white you can't blame it on your race so you'll blame it on something else.

 

And by the way, people are not dogs or horses, so the term "purebred" is used incorrectly here.

 

Most people are happy and thankful to be the racial mix they are, whether they are one race, bi-racial, tri-racial, or a mixed bag. Of course you're thankful you're one race. People tend to be thankful for what they can't change and will use all sorts of justifications to be happy for what they are. (Except the short guys on LoveShack..... )

[Emilia]

 

It turns me off, a good amount so, when a non-black woman dates and finds black men sexually attractive. Why? I always assume the worst. I assume a dreadlock shaking, gold front wearing, "ay cuh what it ih mayne" speaking black guy. And then I just get disgusted by the fact that this lovely Latina, white, asian, indian or whatever non-black woman she is..would even find a guy like that sexually attractive. And then it bumps her down several significant notches on the ladder to me.

 

I rarely find black woman attractive as well, at least, since I moved out here. Before, I used to date a number of black women. They weren't loud, ignorant, obnoxious, etc. They were educated, lovely, etc.

 

I don't know. I can't be prejudiced against my own people, but since I moved out here I don't even claim black people anymore man. They're such an embarassment :/.

 

I was speaking to a number of lovely women I met on PoF and once I found out they like Black Men, I was turned off completely. I'm talking a giant "DC" next to their name for "don't contact".

 

A couple days ago I made a thread about a woman who's a single mother and an illegal alien (as far as the government is concerned). Turns out her son's father is a black guy. That alone made me send her the "I'm not feelin' it" text message.

 

I have a pretty hood, ghetto, gutter Dominican friend who is the same way. ****, he grew up around black people in the hood. If you spoke to him on the phone? You'd think he was a black guy. But no, he's this European looking Dominican guy. I told him how I felt and he told me he's the same way. He said if he's going to date her, she can't be into black guys. But the crazy **** about it is, he mostly dates/sleeps with black women lol.

 

My older brother? The same way.

 

I don't know, I'd hate to think I'm prejudiced against my own people, maybe its the region I live in.

 

I haven't read the whole thread but I think this is about social hierarchy more than anything else. You see those men as existing on the bottom rung of society (and they happen to be black but could be white trash too) and you look down on the women that date down. Do you feel the same way about white trash? Maybe because of your background you are more sensitive to certain racial stereotypes, I think that's normal.

[irc333]

I actually seen a couple of women on dating sites, once I remember specifically saying IN her profile that she ONLY dates interacially, and that she has NO interest in white men, even though she's white herself.

 

Not sure why this is?

 

She said in the past she's attempted to date white guys, but they just don't "do it" for her.

 

Think it's a fetish? Or can white women be truely unattracted to other white men and if so, why?

 

White women find black men attractive because they are different. Like exotic or taboo or something. I personally am not attracted to black men. I'm not racist at all, but just don't find them attractive.

 

Are you subconsciously intimidated by the black men that these women have dated in the past? For whatever reasons?

[FitChick]

I honestly look down on Black People out here in South Florida. Just their whole situation. Poor, uneducated, very ignorant and close minded.

 

Are you saying you don't have a problem with "poor, uneducated, very ignorant and close minded" white people?