lizzieee Posted October 9, 2011 Posted October 9, 2011 Long story short I just graduated from college. So I'm no longer my professor crush's student. I thought ( and still think) the attraction was mutual ( lots of signs over 2 almost 2 years). So after my graduation, I confessed that I like him and asked him out for coffee but here is his answer: I'm not in a position that enables me to have a relationship with you, on any level. He also said he didn't think any less of me. So guys, what do you think? Is there any hope in the future? I'm deeply attracted to him. Is there any thing I can do now to change the situation?
WhiteChocolate Posted October 9, 2011 Posted October 9, 2011 No. He has stated clearly that he is not interested. Even if he might have seemed interested earlier, let's be realistic. When someone flatly refuses something as innocent as a coffee date, they are NOT going to change their mind EVER. Remember, every crush-ee looks at his/her crush through lovey-dovey-tinted lenses. So stop contacting him, delete his e-mail and number if you have it, and date other men. Trust me, it will be easier in the long run
Author lizzieee Posted October 9, 2011 Author Posted October 9, 2011 Well I attempted to talk to him n contacted him via email after the rejection asking him a favour (which I do need one but I could ask from someone else I guess but..) for a letter of job recommendation which he replied within an hour with exactly what I asked for and told me he didn't think any less of me and let him know if I need further help.. It made me think that I still have a chance and it make me miss him.
Arasae Posted October 9, 2011 Posted October 9, 2011 I'm not in a position that enables me to have a relationship with you, on any level. He also said he didn't think any less of me. As someone who has been in a VERY similar situation, this is my advice: back off. The quote above tells me that he is not interested--maybe he was attracted to you, maybe you two flirted, whatever, but because he most likely wants to keep his job, he is saying "no." Please respect that. It will only reflect poorly upon you if you push for anything more; if there IS a chance, then he needs to pursue it himself. He knows of your interest, now the ball is in his court. IF there is a chance, then HE needs to make that decision--any further "encouragement" from you will most likely alienate him from you. If you care about him at all, then let him make a move IF there is a move to make. Move on.
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