momto3boys Posted October 8, 2011 Posted October 8, 2011 It's hard knowing my soon to be ex-husband is out having fun. He emailed me at 2 am after i emailed him because he ignored my calls all day long (i was trying to talk to him about the birth of our child that is due in 4-5 weeks). I asked him why he was ignoring my calls, etc. It is hard knowing he was out til 2 am, while im at home pregnant with 2 kids. It feels like he can move on right now, but im in a stand still because i am pregnant. I can not work right now, i cant go to school. I cant date. I really cant do much since im due so soon. I dont even feel like hanging out with friends because i barely have any money, gas and im always exhausted from being a single mom to 2 kids and being 35 weeks pregnant with my 3rd kid. i keep having the urge to call him. I dont know why. I guess its harder on the weekends because i know he has off. I know it will be easier to deal with once i have the baby and i can work, go to school.
Dark Phoenix Posted October 9, 2011 Posted October 9, 2011 You also have to deal with the fluctuation of hormones during and shortly after the pregnancy. Sorry if I added to your pain in saying that, it is mainly for you to realize that things will get easier to deal with shortly. I'm a guy so I never had to deal with being pregnant, and I'm only 21 so I don't have a lot of life experience but I can certainly tell you that it does get better over time. I just recently got a job 2 weeks ago so I had to deal with 5.5 months post breakup with no money, gas, job, or school to keep me occupied. I managed to keep on my feet with the help of friends and family, granted that most of my friends and family had jobs and other commitments so they couldn't cater to me 100% of the time, I still managed to heal. I'm 6 months out of my breakup and even though I'm not quite there yet I can go about my day and appreciate all that I do have, and I feel that I am almost to the point where I could date and have a relationship again. Focus on things that make you happy. Maybe study a subject that you are interested in that you never really got the chance to, or start reading books/spending more time online communicating with friends. Do anything that makes you happy just being you, don't worry about the pressures of being with friends and family if that does not suit you. Just worry about you and appreciate all that you have.
Zabs Posted October 9, 2011 Posted October 9, 2011 Normal reactions to abnormal situation honey! It sounds like he is just playing with your head. He KNOWS what the circumstances are and is making a full on attack on those limitations! A***! Shock him by doing all the things that you have always wanted to do like Dark said. Pour your love into your children and save the rest of that love for yourself. He will be both shocked and in awe of that strength! Admittedly, it is hard. My child's Father when I was pregnant spent his time drinking and on crack cocaine. Selling everything he possibly could, stealing my milk tokens for our child and generally not being around. When I was in labour, I called him. He was in the middle of nowhere out of his face and if it weren't for my Dad he would have missed the birth of his child. I remember all that s*** like it was yesterday and I also recall how amazed he was when I said I was terrified of being a first time Mum but I would rather do it on my own than have a Father for my Son like that.. It was tremendously empowering. In terms of hormones, you know the drill darling;) just accept that it is part of how you will feel for a bit and it will pass. Focus your attention on something worthwhile cos that a******* doesn't deserve you .....GOsh I am so MAD on your behalf! We are all here for you sweetie...anytime Much love Zabs xx
Author momto3boys Posted October 9, 2011 Author Posted October 9, 2011 THank you both for the encouraging words. I plan to join a strip pole fitness class after this baby to lose the 25 lbs ive gained (so far ) and being involved in my oldest sons school and just trying to stay positive. It sounds horrible but im trying to get excited about this baby (which btw was planned! So thats more of a slap in the face knowing he kicked me out at 8 months pregnant with a baby we planned). I have been more stressed out about the birth, how im going to manage it all a lone that i havent been that excited, but im getting there.
StellaA Posted October 9, 2011 Posted October 9, 2011 It is hard! Even harder for you being pregnant! Sometimes I drive myself crazy thinking about all the things my ex 'maybe' doing. The other morning he was walking home in the morning and automatically I start thinking he has been with someone even though deep down I know he is not like that BUT again, it would be none of my business now which is hard to handle and accept
Author momto3boys Posted October 9, 2011 Author Posted October 9, 2011 Stella - As soon as i saw he emailed me at 2 am i assumed hes been with a girl. I dont know and its not really any of my business but it makes me feel like IF he has been, how disrespectful to me and his baby. He cant wait 4 more weeks?! But then again i dont know for sure. He has also started not calling me, ignoring my calls, etc so it makes me assume its because hes with a girl. but he is also in the army and he does work A LOT. I know next week he will be in the field. So i know ill feel better knowing hes out in the field, lol
StellaA Posted October 9, 2011 Posted October 9, 2011 I think being women we over think! prob very innocent and they are prob feeling same aa us
Author momto3boys Posted October 9, 2011 Author Posted October 9, 2011 True but my ex was on dating websites a week after he told me he wanted a divorce and has been talking to girls via facebook. He's really changed.
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