I got my second chance but I lost it again..

[s t a c y]

So, we were together for 2.5 years when we first broke up. We were on LDR during that period. He got a rebound and ended after 2 months. We started contacting each other frequently after that.

 

He came back early this year, and we met up and we got back together. However, things turn sour, we were more distant than ever. He got a job in the bank and spent a lot of time drinking with his colleagues after work. He said this is because I didn't spend much time with him. Well, I'm from a traditional family and my mom still sets curfews for me, although I'm 23 already. My mom didn't like him and therefore, I didn't tell her about us getting back together.

 

After few months, he decided to break it off since our family background isn't compatible. And he thinks that I'll forever be a family person and that freaks him out. He's afraid that in the future, if we get married, he will have to treat my family like how I treat them, and that's not how he was brought up to be.

 

The problem isn't just the difference in family background. He also thinks that I'm not ambitious enough. I don't know what's happening around me because I don't read the papers. I don't plan for my career. I don't plan for my future.

 

I know it will be really hard if I am to get back together with him again. But at the same time, it's really hard to let someone I treasure and love the most go. What should I do?

[Eddie Edirol]

I say you let him go until you move out of your moms house. If I were him, i wouldnt put up with a 23 year old that has a curfew and over protective parents. Hes afraid that if he marries you, that you will do anything to please your parents, even it if they are wrong, and its against him. You have to be your own person before dating seriously. Hes right, you do need more ambition.

[s t a c y]

I'm an Asian, it's unusual for us to just move out unless I'm working in another state or country. Yea I totally understand where is he coming from. I have started working on my career and also my future already. I will be having my own business in a year's time, hopefully. And I'm reading the papers everyday and be more observant with what's happening around.

 

And I'm working on the curfew as well. I can't go traveling with my friends last time, but I can go anywhere I like now. And I'm pushing the curfew bit by bit. He makes me grow and I seriously think he is someone I really want to be with.

[s t a c y]

I have talked to my mom regarding my freedom and she agreed to let me have it, but in a condition that I have to tell her if I am going home late, with who and where am I. I understand that and I promised I will take care of myself.

 

I have also told her that I couldn't let go of this guy. She said if we really want to be together she can't stop us, this is my life. But she thinks that there are better guys out there and I should find a better one. Personally, I think my ex is a great guy apart from some personality issues eg egoistic and impatient.

 

I have broken NC a few times. Sometimes he was happy and funny when he replied but sometimes he was cold. I asked for a meet up 2 weeks ago and after a few hours he replied saying he was busy that night. A week later I hinted to go out he said his sister was over so it would be a busy weekend. I said it's alright, maybe next week. He said ok but still have to see first and that he will tell me again.

 

My feeling was like a roller coaster. I would be fine sometimes, knowing I still have a lot of things to achieve in life. But sometimes I will just fall back and think, should I fight for him. He has done a lot for me in the beginning, and now maybe I should do something in return...

 

But I'm not sure what he thinks about this relationship...When we broke up he was crying too, and kissed on my forehead twice. Should I fight for him regardless of the differences in us? Or just let him go forever (which is quite hard for me as he really means a lot to me)?