njruns75 Posted October 7, 2011 Posted October 7, 2011 So out of the blue, my friend's brother in law emailed me saying he had a great guy to set me up with. He told this guy about me too and the guy was interested. We started emailing 2 or 3 weeks ago on facebook (lengthy emails almost every day) He mentioned that we should have the chance to meet in person soon and I said that that sounded like a good idea. A few days after we started chatting, he went on vacation to another country for 10 days. I was suprised to hear from him almost every day while on vacation (via email) short emails. In one email he asked "what are your thoughts about our first actual meeting?" I replied that I am cool with going wherever and I told him my work schedule. He didn't reply to this. Then right before he came back, I emailed him and said "here is my number, hope that's not too forward of me, but it might be easier if you'd like to call/text." He texted right when he got off plane saying it was not forward at all of me etc. Ok, so this was a week ago. Then he asked "what does your week look like?"By this, I assumed he was looking to arrange a meeting. Again, I told him my work schedule and said I have no plans yet. No reply to it. Ok, so now it's the wkend. He's been sending random texts but nothing today and I assume no plan for wkend. I am paniking bc I have this happen often (guys acting like they want to go out and mentioning it, but not actually asking me out. ) i also have ot mention that th e guy who did the setting up (really nice guy) said this guy is an awesome nice guy and not a player type. He was engaged for a while and has not dated anyone since they broke it off a while ago. Could this guy be shy? Should I be more aggressive here or should the guy do the first asking out?I already gave him my phone number without him asking! Or is he just not that interested?
Leegh Posted October 11, 2011 Posted October 11, 2011 I would suggest waiting a couple of weeks, and if you've heard nothing, send him a casual email or text saying you're hoping to get together. I would suggest something casual like a cup of coffee. I believe he probably is shy; but the way to find out is to try one more time, stating you're available, and see if he takes the bait! There's nothing worse then not knowing if a person is interested or not, and hopefully soon you'll have your answer soon. Good luck.
Pasttense Posted October 11, 2011 Posted October 11, 2011 I don't really see what you have to lose if you ask him out yourself.
thatone Posted October 11, 2011 Posted October 11, 2011 i'm guessing the engagement breakup is his issue. he's probably getting pressured by the friend to get out and meet other women but isn't quite sure of it yet. that's how i am after breaking up with someone i've been with longer than a few dates. striking up conversation with women and generally being friendly, asking for phone numbers? fine, but the actual arranging dates with someone else is a feeling of 'end' to the last relationship that may or may not be ready to happen. so i don't see a problem with you taking the initiative either...."so, we gonna meet up this week? how about thursday?" if he hesitates ask him what day. put him on the spot, see what he does.
WhiteChocolate Posted October 11, 2011 Posted October 11, 2011 so i don't see a problem with you taking the initiative either...."so, we gonna meet up this week? how about thursday?" if he hesitates ask him what day. put him on the spot, see what he does. I agree with this. I can see how you might be trying to measure his interest by whether HE asks you or not. But you haven't even met, and if you don't make a move, the time until your first meeting with just drag on...and on...and you will be a nervous wreck when you do meet a month later. So be bold. Nothing wrong with being forward, men like confident women. And they also like knowing you are interested.
thatone Posted October 11, 2011 Posted October 11, 2011 So be bold. Nothing wrong with being forward, men like confident women. And they also like knowing you are interested. very true.
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