irc333 Posted October 6, 2011 Posted October 6, 2011 I'm seeing this quite alot, either their siblings, offsprings, or friend seem to be doing the dating profiles FOR them...and not actually doing it themselves. I was talkign to this one woman, I pointed out something about a cool picture of herself, and she said she was unaware of said photo, because her daughter has been in control over that. Or they claim IN their profile that their "friend put them up to it" or "put up the ad for them" Seems women do this more so than men right? And why is this?
oaks Posted October 6, 2011 Posted October 6, 2011 Or they claim IN their profile that their "friend put them up to it" or "put up the ad for them" Seems women do this more so than men right? And why is this? Half the time I think it's a fiction so they can be less embarrassed about using online dating. (So I quickly skip past those people.)
grkBoy Posted October 6, 2011 Posted October 6, 2011 I co-sign with oaks. I don't care how many say otherwise, I still think too many see online dating as "for losers", and thus they avoid it, or finally cave and use it with their fingers on the "delete account" button at all times when someone they know in real life recognizes them. I still even hear of some who push their new SO to make up a story on how they met, rather than say it was on the net. The other possibility is this person is very clueless on dating and attraction, so they have someone else managing the account in the hopes it will get them results. Hiring a marketing department basically.
Author irc333 Posted October 6, 2011 Author Posted October 6, 2011 I co-sign with oaks. I don't care how many say otherwise, I still think too many see online dating as "for losers", and thus they avoid it, or finally cave and use it with their fingers on the "delete account" button at all times when someone they know in real life recognizes them. I still even hear of some who push their new SO to make up a story on how they met, rather than say it was on the net. The other possibility is this person is very clueless on dating and attraction, so they have someone else managing the account in the hopes it will get them results. Hiring a marketing department basically. Yeah, this is kind of simliar when a woman who is looking for a man that has this "Must pass the Best friend test" I sawt his dating show, where this woman in her 30's was saying she was wanting to introduce her date to her best female friends, she said if they don't pass the best friends test....he's OUT Thus keeping accountability away from her, not a very grown up thing.
oaks Posted October 6, 2011 Posted October 6, 2011 Yeah, this is kind of simliar when a woman who is looking for a man that has this "Must pass the Best friend test" I sawt his dating show, where this woman in her 30's was saying she was wanting to introduce her date to her best female friends, she said if they don't pass the best friends test....he's OUT Thus keeping accountability away from her, not a very grown up thing. I don't have a problem with that so long as it works the other way, too. If my friends tell me I'm dating the wrong person (and can articulate why) then I'll listen to them because they're my friends. (but I might ignore them, too)
Emilia Posted October 6, 2011 Posted October 6, 2011 I sawt his dating show, where this woman in her 30's was saying she was wanting to introduce her date to her best female friends, she said if they don't pass the best friends test....he's OUT Thus keeping accountability away from her, not a very grown up thing. Agree. It also indicates lack of confidence in one's ability to judge character and the type of person who cares too much about what others think.
grkBoy Posted October 6, 2011 Posted October 6, 2011 I think it's fine to introduce someone to the friends and then later privately ask their opinion, but it should be taken as that...opinion. I used to have a "friend" who didn't find women easily, and got very jealous and petty when I or other male friends in the group found girlfriends. He would instantly tell us he didn't like the girl, and make it out to be that he thinks she's a "first class bitch" or tries to make it sound like the friendship will suffer because she wants to dominate time. I've known females with friends just like that...frenemies basically who would rather see all their friends alone rather than happy. This former "friend" of mine even once confessed if he met a hot girl who even showed interest in one of us, he would not introduce her, simply because he felt if he can't have her, he won't let any of us get lucky. Now you can see why he's not anyone's friend anymore. Anyway, my point is you need to be careful when your friends tell you they don't like a guy or girl you're dating. You have to be careful that petty BS isn't their agenda. Take their words at face value and be careful if they ALL say they don't like this person you're with...but make up your own mind. To go and reject someone who hasn't done you any wrong just because your friends don't like this person is immature and spineless. What if the pack of gal pals tell you he's no good because he's a "nice guy" or homebody and they are more seeking out "bad boys" or party animals for you and themselves?
january2011 Posted October 6, 2011 Posted October 6, 2011 (edited) Have to admit that I'd look at anyone sideways if they weren't in full control of their online profile. I like people who are competent and in control of their lives as well as their personal information. I think that it also impacts on trust and privacy issues. How can I be sure that I'm not talking to/flirting with the guy's twelve-year old techie nephew? RE: friends' opinions - unless there is something glaringly obvious and bad, I think they should keep their opinions to themselves. I might listen to opinions out of politeness or if I'm really conflicted and ask for advice, but in general, I don't need or want my friends to help me in making life choices, especially about who I do/don't date because a lot of the time their opinions would be biased based on their own personal preferences and not mine. Edited October 6, 2011 by january2011
Recommended Posts