How do I break up with the Preggo girlfriend for someone else.

[Kortalian]

My Title sounds terrible. I have been involved with my current girlfriend for slightly over a year. I'm 29 and she is 23. She is a quite beautiful model like Irish woman. When the mirror was removed things changed. I found out she is an alcoholic and is pretty selfish. She starts fights with me and sometimes just gets mad and hits me while she is drunk. She hates my family and friends even though they have done nothing to her. She fights with me if I hang around them. She drinks 12 to 15 beers everyday with maybe a day of not drinking once a month. She has hid it quite well in time. I've gotten pretty sick of being a nice guy trying to fix someone unfixable.

 

I more or less met someone pretty amazing and insanely beautiful on a guys night out last Thursday. Someone that knows all my friends and is closer to my age with their life in order. Weird I never met her over the years with all the mutual friends. Anywho, we clicked instantly and things got pretty intense. I finally felt a boost to make it easier for me to leave someone who is terrible to me and has done things with other guys behind my back.

 

Well Friday comes along. And I want to be set free. I call the girlfriend and of course she is crabby. I wanted to meet up but she feels sick. Then she says I think I'm pregnant. I'm like how is that. You haven't slept with me in almost a month. Well she had one day of spotting and period was way over due followed by cramping. So I spend 60 bucks in preggo testers. Sure enough she is prenant. I take her to the hospital on Saturday. She was a month into pregnancy. So I decided to put what happened to me on Thursday aside. And focus on this.

 

Hiding text messages was the hardest. I am so new to this and never had to hide anything with anyone. Sunday she decided she didn't want to keep it. And started her drinking routine and newport smoking routine before she told me this. I met up with her at her house. Her parents were told even though she said she could never tell them. They were all drunk. I just got off work then school and was thrown to the alcoholic wolves. Her mom flipped out and then her dad swung at me. So alcohol has won another selfish battle. I walked out and want to say f it. She told me she will keep it if I walk away. So I came back and googled clinics the abortion clinic appointment is Saturday.

 

She has been drinking everyday since Sunday and been talking to me like complete arse everyday acting like a victim in the middle. Saying I haven't been there for her. I've been supportive and also been doing research on clinics and pawning things to come up with the money. I work full time and go to school full time. My full time job just covers all my bills cause I'm low paid and live on my own.

 

I'm trying to wait this out till Saturday. I pawned almost everything I loved but I can't be with someone like that. Someone like her that drinks and smokes while pregnant is totally selfish. The other girl doesn't know. I feel it will kill her inside. She likes me a lot and my friends say she is like me and a good girl in general. I'm scared to get caught up while with the current. There is no affection with her for the last 2 months.

 

I do have a big heart and it's bothering me to leave someone after they have an abortion which I'm against btw. Especially, someone that has been like a best friend for the most part for a year. I honestly don't even know how to break it down without killing her inside. I would choose her if it wasn't for drinking. But I've come in second to it everytime. Sucks people are so amazing aside from their addictions but can't see it. Any advice because I feel like the bad guy and feel karma will bite me in the arse for this.

[EgoJoe]

You need professional advice. There are free agencies that can help you, dial 211 if you live in the United States.

 

 

Also don't break up with her for someone else...atleast not immediatly. Take time to mourn the relationship, you will grow as a person.

[eleanorhurting]

breaking up for someone else is NEVER the answer.

[TheDovic]

Speaking as a social worker dude you need to contact social services if this person is going to keep the baby. She is doing it irreperable damage at present and if she keeps drinking it will almost certainly have Foetal Alcohol Syndrome, which is really unpleasant!

 

Whether she keeps the baby or not you need to get away from her because she is abusive (something else you need to tell social services for the sake of the baby - if she is abusive to you, odds are she will be towards the baby). You will not be happy with this person, but if she has the baby you need to be in it's life, because it will need at least one consistent parent, and I'm sorry to say this, but alcoholics only consistently drink!!!

 

Research shows children do better when their parents are seperated and happy as opposed to parents who are together and who fight!