Zabs Posted October 4, 2011 Posted October 4, 2011 This should probably be a poll, but I don't know how to do it... How many of you think that 'they' will always come back? My thoughts are that a person will never forget how you made them feel even if they try to replicate that with another...We all want to feel good and the Cat truly knows where it's bread is buttereds...so Yes...The Cat always comes back! LOL:laugh:
mike588 Posted October 4, 2011 Posted October 4, 2011 This should probably be a poll, but I don't know how to do it... How many of you think that 'they' will always come back? My thoughts are that a person will never forget how you made them feel even if they try to replicate that with another...We all want to feel good and the Cat truly knows where it's bread is buttereds...so Yes...The Cat always comes back! LOL:laugh: I made my ex. feel fantastic,appreciated,special but she's gone never to return.
Author Zabs Posted October 4, 2011 Author Posted October 4, 2011 Coincidentally, I thought I should elaborate... NEVER come back as in EVER or Not in your timeline..as in your expectations... How many of us have lived to actually say NEVER? I think NEVER in our timeline would be most appropriate for this question.... Zabs xx
carhill Posted October 4, 2011 Posted October 4, 2011 Yes, my cat always comes back each morning to be fed. Come to think of it, my exW isn't much different
silly_panda Posted October 4, 2011 Posted October 4, 2011 Nope... Don't think so... For dumpees, we always tell them "there are many other fish out there"... For dumpers, it's the same for them...
radiodarcy Posted October 4, 2011 Posted October 4, 2011 i've heard a lot of people say this. but i can honestly say in my experience this is not true. once the guy said he was done, that was it; end of story.
Mar1neOne Posted October 4, 2011 Posted October 4, 2011 Coincidentally, I thought I should elaborate... NEVER come back as in EVER or Not in your timeline..as in your expectations... How many of us have lived to actually say NEVER? I think NEVER in our timeline would be most appropriate for this question.... Zabs xx I totally agree... If you had a real relationship with a person, they don't just forget about you either.
RenoColt Posted October 4, 2011 Posted October 4, 2011 Dear Zabs, You know my story from my post from yesterday where you gave me such good, kind advice. I'm guessing in my case, where you have someone who isn't just borderline, but extremely narcissistic, yes... the cat will return. From what I've read, narcissists end up having to recycle their suppliers of attention periodically because they keep wearing out people. So, they go back to their old sources to see if there's anything left to tap. Of course, my problem has been being the guy who stands up and yells, "Oh, Mr. Narcissist! Pick me! Pick me!" In hindsight, a very unwise response to his return.
written in the stars Posted October 4, 2011 Posted October 4, 2011 They say "Never say never" but I think that dumpers never forget..........now dumpers giving a damn is a completely different story!
ffw Posted October 4, 2011 Posted October 4, 2011 (edited) Depends upon the cat. I know my cat will return only when her heart is broken. Edited October 4, 2011 by ffw
immitable Posted October 4, 2011 Posted October 4, 2011 When I was a dumper I always came back, not because I was feeling guilty but to give us a chance and see from a distance if things can be improved. I just recently had a chance to talk to my ex, we remained friends, she found someone else and it was really nice to talk to her. I was never a bad dumper, I guess, I never used to string the girl along if I knew it wasn't working/too different/different plans etc. and I always gave valid reasons. This recent breakup where I am a dumpee for the first time is a new territory for me and knowing that my ex of 5 years doesn't want to speak and not to mention give me closure speaks volumes of her and what sort of person she is. I think she never really loved me truly and was just stringig me along for 5 years pretending to be something she really isn't.
fetish1980 Posted October 5, 2011 Posted October 5, 2011 i think if you genuinely treated them well overall, and they have history with you, they usually come back. Notice I said usually not always. Of course, i'm still learning this stuff now. fetish
lymtal1 Posted October 5, 2011 Posted October 5, 2011 one of mine came back after 20 years. she's still around and very close. another came back after six months. the other i f****** never wanted to see again so that worked out really good. this last one i wish would but i will never see her or talk to her again. so i'm just guessing 50/50 but certainly not scientific by any means.
Rorschach64 Posted October 5, 2011 Posted October 5, 2011 Dear Zabs, You know my story from my post from yesterday where you gave me such good, kind advice. I'm guessing in my case, where you have someone who isn't just borderline, but extremely narcissistic, yes... the cat will return. From what I've read, narcissists end up having to recycle their suppliers of attention periodically because they keep wearing out people. So, they go back to their old sources to see if there's anything left to tap. Of course, my problem has been being the guy who stands up and yells, "Oh, Mr. Narcissist! Pick me! Pick me!" In hindsight, a very unwise response to his return. Oh boy this means my Ex-fiancee is going to come back! YAY! YAY! .....Damn it
bluenightowl Posted October 5, 2011 Posted October 5, 2011 Depends upon the cat. I know my cat will return only when her heart is broken. I agree. If a dumper is feeling attention starved, they might come back for a drink, but don't kid yourself into believing they want anything more than your attention.
Sugarkane Posted October 5, 2011 Posted October 5, 2011 They don't always come back. I treated all my exes well and never cheated. Yet: my high school boyfriend never came back. It's been almost a decade now. And my ex that sent me here Also never came back. it's now been about 14 months. If they always come back, why doesn't it happen to me? 1
smudge21 Posted October 5, 2011 Posted October 5, 2011 It all depends on how the break up occured - if it were because simply the dumper lost that loving feeling, tried to make it work but couldn't and so ended it, then no, they don't come back. The love has gone and that's that. If however, there was cheating or similar, then the relationship in some ways has been forced apart and often the love, or at least some feeling, is still there. In that situation the dumper can often come back, usually once they realise the grass wasn't the shade of green they thought it was.
spider165 Posted October 5, 2011 Posted October 5, 2011 Even though she has hurt me bad I still wish she would come back more than anything... yet deep down inside I know she is gone forever! I had hope... now I have nothing.
Author Zabs Posted October 5, 2011 Author Posted October 5, 2011 Some interesting points...shades of grey rather than black and white hey? I think how a relationship deteriorated probably is key in answering about the prodigal Cat lol:D as highlighted by another poster.
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