Bobert Posted October 4, 2011 Posted October 4, 2011 I have been happily married for 12 years, house, family and career. I wake up on Saturday morning and check facebook to see what my friends are up to. Hay look a new friend request, I click it and BAMM! My ex-fiance wants to be friends and write's Hi Bobert, long time no see, what are you up to. In one second and a click all the emotions from a failed relationship came rushing back and hit me like a ton of bricks. This woman gave me back my ring, broke my heart and kicked me to the curb 17 years ago. Ok, Ive grown up and moved on but why after this amount of time and she has already decided I was not good enought for her, does she want to be friends with me?? After a few days I decided to ignor her request. I see no reason to let her be apart of my life again, share my pic's and see the progress I have made. Secondly I can not imagin how my wife would feel. Rant Over.........
Eeyore79 Posted October 4, 2011 Posted October 4, 2011 There are probably no hard feelings on her part, and no pain remaining from the break-up. I expect she just sees you as an old acquaintance and decided to say hi. As far as she's concerned, your previous relationship is water under the bridge - it ended almost two decades ago and she probably assumes it's so far in your past that her contacting you isn't a big deal. If you still find it painful to think about her then ignore her friend request. However, the fact that you still find it painful after all this time suggests that you might have some issues you still need to work out.
smudge21 Posted October 4, 2011 Posted October 4, 2011 Had the same from my ex although it wasn't after that long. It's on a website used by millions to... er... well, I'm yet to know why people use it so much, but basically just ignore it. You owe this person nothing and have moved on. Don't let it bother you anymore.
Wolf1969 Posted October 4, 2011 Posted October 4, 2011 People handle things differently. I actually ran across my ex on FB (saw her listed as a friend of a friend) and sent her a friend request. She accepted and we talk from time to time. It was 20+ years ago and we have both matured. We are both married now and have our own lives. We are both into photography and enjoy critiquing each others photos. Not everyone will have the same results. In fact, most people say NOT to befriend your ex on FB.
Thieves Posted October 5, 2011 Posted October 5, 2011 I have been happily married for 12 years, house, family and career. I wake up on Saturday morning and check facebook to see what my friends are up to. Hay look a new friend request, I click it and BAMM! My ex-fiance wants to be friends and write's Hi Bobert, long time no see, what are you up to. In one second and a click all the emotions from a failed relationship came rushing back and hit me like a ton of bricks. This woman gave me back my ring, broke my heart and kicked me to the curb 17 years ago. Ok, Ive grown up and moved on but why after this amount of time and she has already decided I was not good enought for her, does she want to be friends with me?? After a few days I decided to ignor her request. I see no reason to let her be apart of my life again, share my pic's and see the progress I have made. Secondly I can not imagin how my wife would feel. Rant Over......... I agree with others who say it's most likely she thinks it's water under the bridge now. Most exes do naturally assume this after some long period of time. But as they say sometimes, 'To assume is to make an ass out of you and me.' If you don't feel comfortable with it and think your wife would get suspicious, don't accept the request. It's not worth the trouble just so you can, what, say you're 'good acquaintances' with your long-time ex?
janbaz Posted October 5, 2011 Posted October 5, 2011 This woman gave me back my ring, broke my heart and kicked me to the curb 17 years ago. Gosh. Your brain still releasing chemicals for her. You should be very happy. Go kiss your wife and delete her request.
DustySaltus Posted October 6, 2011 Posted October 6, 2011 Gosh. Your brain still releasing chemicals for her. You should be very happy. Go kiss your wife and delete her request. Agree 100%. I think that things may not be going the way she thought in her life right now and wanted to reach out. I think it's more about filling her own needs than anything else.
Author Bobert Posted October 10, 2011 Author Posted October 10, 2011 Thanks all. While I was agitated and curious, I just figured nothing good could come from contact with her again in any form. I told my wife about it over diner this weekend and she chuckled and said "Im sure you dont want to deal with that again, but being friends on FB should be no big deal and ok with me, its your decision." I thanked her and told her thats why I love her, but I blocked the X. We both laughed and enjoyed the great weather this weekend. So in other news the protesters..........
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