BLuvv Posted October 3, 2011 Posted October 3, 2011 Okay, like I admitted in my last post, I know it's ridiculous that I've gone no contact and I'm upset he hasn't contacted me. But it is starting to really upset me. Today is day 7 and for those who don't know my story, I was in an on-again, off-again relationship, he dumped me twice, and ultimately I dumped him a year ago and then our relationship devolved into a very unhappy (for me) relationship of "friends with benefits". Last Monday, we had plans and he cancelled last minute and I was furious. But it sparked me to realize I need to move on. I didn't ever answer his last texts because I was so upset and hurt, just shaking and crying. He gave some sort of apology and said we had plenty of time to hang out later. Problem is, it's not the first time he's cancelled on me. And I feel like all along I've never been a priority. Now that he is just completely ignoring me after it feels like he never gave a crap about making me feel better or that the things he does upset me. Ugh, I just want to forget him. It just makes me feel bad about myself that I put up with this bs for so long. And I defended him to so many people all this time when people told me I could do better. Makes me feel like an idiot. And him just blowing me off confirms what an idiot I was to waste my time. On a positive note, I still do not want to text or call him. I've been the one to do that WAY too many times.
Chi townD Posted October 3, 2011 Posted October 3, 2011 First off, you're not an idiot. You have to look at NC as a way to get over the guy. To heal from a relationship that you've pretty much stated as toxic. So what! He doesn't contact you! Good! I think you respect yourself to be MORE than a friend with benefits! So, the next time you give yourself to someone physically, it's because you're in a loving and caring relationship. And believe me, sex in that kind of relationship is mindblowing compared to someone that just wanted to stop by for a booty call! So relax! Enjoy your independence! Save and get your butt down to Key West!
eleanorhurting Posted October 3, 2011 Posted October 3, 2011 be glad hes out of your life. After ignoring calls and texts and skype messages from my ex, I ran into him at the hospital (we are both medical students) and he asked me to have lunch with him and instead of turning away I said yes. I acted cool and like nothing happened but that was a dumb, dumb idea. Anyway, I'm fine. Back to acting like he's not important... I'm pretty sure the only reason he asked me to lunch was so he could gve me a ride to my place to see if i would invite him up and we would have sex. It obviously did NOT happen.
Author BLuvv Posted October 3, 2011 Author Posted October 3, 2011 What would you do if the jerk texted you? Good question. That's the thing, there is nothing really left to say at this point, I've said pretty much everything to him. None of it did any good. I did feel bad just ignoring him and not explaining I was going no contact, assuming he would eventually text to hang out again. I don't know why I feel bad, I'm hurt and angry, but still don't want to be mean (and even just ignoring seems rude to me). Then again, maybe it's best he hasn't texted, because maybe I'm not ready to deal with having to say that and handle whatever his response may be if I tell him I'm moving on.
Author BLuvv Posted October 3, 2011 Author Posted October 3, 2011 @Chi townD: Thank you for the vaca reminder!! I actually dreamed last night I was down at the resort in Florida that I stayed at last spring. It was the most gorgeous place I've ever been!! Gaylord Palms in Orlando...I would love to go back- best part it was paid for by work! lol And thank you for saying I'm not an idiot! I still have a terrible habit of beating myself up over stuff that even sometimes I don't have control over. And you're right, I do want to be with someone who feels the same way about me as I do about them. There is nothing in the world like that. The thing is I really did love this guy, but I never felt he truly loved me back. He told me he did, but I just didn't feel it from him. It was different than when I was with my ex-fiance, despite our problems, I know he did love me. And I moved on and got over that relationship- so surely I can get past this one!!
Author BLuvv Posted October 3, 2011 Author Posted October 3, 2011 be glad hes out of your life. After ignoring calls and texts and skype messages from my ex, I ran into him at the hospital (we are both medical students) and he asked me to have lunch with him and instead of turning away I said yes. I acted cool and like nothing happened but that was a dumb, dumb idea. Anyway, I'm fine. Back to acting like he's not important... I'm pretty sure the only reason he asked me to lunch was so he could gve me a ride to my place to see if i would invite him up and we would have sex. It obviously did NOT happen. @Eleanor: I'm glad you were strong. I don't know if I could handle seeing my ex in person right now. That was always the problem. I'd be all determined and then see him and melt! I'm really impressed you have to go to school with him and see him and still are staying so strong! And yes, it is for the best. Like they say, you can't find the right person if you're busy wasting your time on the wrong one! It really is true. And I'm sure someday when I get over this I will be able to find someone better!
Chi townD Posted October 4, 2011 Posted October 4, 2011 SEE!!!! You need start start saving and just go!!!! Trust me! I know what I'm talking about!
barriob Posted October 4, 2011 Posted October 4, 2011 i need help too! i am still chasing my ex. texting him and he wont respond
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