beefolive Posted October 3, 2011 Posted October 3, 2011 Ive posted before about my breakup, working with my ex and the fact that she wont respond or deal with our breakup at all (ive written a letter, asked to talk numerous times and also asked by email). She has also got herself a new guy she met on holiday after two weeks although she doesnt know i know. Anyway, im leaving my job (where i work with her) in four days and i want to write her a short card. Basically to say thanks for the two years and i hope she is happy. Also to make sure the guy is good to her. Any thoughts or suggestions as to what i can write, i need to keep it short hence why im asking, otherwise ill end up writing a novel. Thanks in advance
jcrod311 Posted October 3, 2011 Posted October 3, 2011 This isn't what you're looking for, but I personally wouldn't write her anything. I personally have never gained anything from writing or sending my exes a final goodbye or a last testament of my love for them or whatever.
harrisdo09 Posted October 3, 2011 Posted October 3, 2011 my ex came back to love me more than before and can now even sacrificed all he has for me. thanks to this site http://spiritualomoso.webs.com[/url] from UK that helped me in getting him back from a strange woman. if you don't mind you can contact them to help you out. so that she can miss you again and get back to you
smudge21 Posted October 3, 2011 Posted October 3, 2011 I did say goodbye in an email and I did it totally for me, not to get a reaction. I just had things I wanted to say and wanted to clear the air. I have walked away before from previous relationships, and often wished I'd just said goodbye properly. So this time I did so and it felt good. The only reason I wouldn't say anything is if there was cheating involved or you have any anger than you wish to get out. My goodbye email wasn't full of emotion, although it did say how I felt about her. There was no anger towards her and we split as friends. Aslong as what you say is totally for your piece of mind and not some attempt to get a reaction or response, then go for it I say. Just write out what's on your mind - sleep on it and then read it back to yourself. You want to keep it short and simple. I think mine was three paragraphs, but nothing too deep.
Author beefolive Posted October 3, 2011 Author Posted October 3, 2011 There is a lot i feel like i want to see and for me leaving knowing that ive done everything that i could will be enough i think. It confuses me how someone you were with for two years can suddenly act like a total stranger. I poured my heart into a letter before and she didnt even acknowledge it. Writing her the card isnt to get any sort of reaction, its me just saying goodbye i guess, in my own way.
smudge21 Posted October 3, 2011 Posted October 3, 2011 Hmm, for me it was the one and only time I wrote to her. If yours has ignored in the past, then maybe that says a lot... maybe that says to just walk away. I know I said go for it, but with her ignoring in the past I feel you may just waste your time on this. I know you'd probably like to believe that there's still that same person you fell in love with somewhere, and maybe your email will reach her. But in truth when people change, they change for good and move on totally. Why not consider that walking away without saying anything will actually say more to her then any email would.
TheDovic Posted October 3, 2011 Posted October 3, 2011 I may be wrong but I think you're doing this so she will see you care about her. Believe me, I contemplated doing things like this with my ex too, but by doing this she won't think "oh he's such a good guy so I'm going to go back to him!" She knows you care about her, but she's not attracted to you right now, and I bet that's why she left, because you were a nice guy and she lost attraction. I believe women aren't attracted to men who give in to them, spoil them and make them the centre of their universe. Yes, for a while this can be special but I believe they want a strong man who is mysterious and confident, who doesn't give into them when they challenge him and acts like he wants her in his life as opposed to needing her. I know it's so so difficult dude, but best thing you can do here is go nc or at least lc and if she calls, texts or emails you DON'T show your emotions but instead make fun of her in a teasing way. Have things going on in your life (even if you have to lie), don't answer all her questions (be mysterious) and don't constantly ask her things. Doing these things will at the very least save your dignity because she will expect you to send nice notes, beg her and tell her you love her. BUT if you act indifferent I guarantee it'll at least make her think! (even if you don't want her back)
Author beefolive Posted October 3, 2011 Author Posted October 3, 2011 Many Thanks for the good advice again. You are totally correct, she isnt interested in me at all just now. Id go as far as to say that she doesnt even appear to care. Its funny how two years with someone can appear to mean so so little. Im still unsure whether to bother saying goodbye or doing anything like writing a note. Its tough, i want her to miss me and get back in contact when im gone, im just not sure if it will happen or not.
headsashed Posted October 3, 2011 Posted October 3, 2011 If your going to send a goodbye letter and dont want any reaction just make it short and simple,thats what i would do,me and my ex have said goodbye twice to each other but it never worked,she always contacted me for some reason. like i said,short and simple if you just want to say goodbye.
smudge21 Posted October 3, 2011 Posted October 3, 2011 "Its tough, i want her to miss me and get back in contact when im gone, im just not sure if it will happen or not." It won't happen now as her attention is elsewhere, so nothing you really say will change that (hence why I said, only send an email if you don't expect a response). I presume you'll be saying goodbye to everyone at work, so treat her the same way. Don't even mention the past and just say goodbye politely. No hesitation, no looking back; basically, no feeding of her ego - she may be expecting something as you've made efforts in the past, so doing the opposite will affect her more. Walk away knowing that you don't know what the future holds, but that it's going to be good.
Author beefolive Posted October 3, 2011 Author Posted October 3, 2011 Again many thanks Ill think long and hard before making any desicion on what to do Airing toward nothing though, trying hard has made no difference so far
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