Lucio Posted October 2, 2011 Posted October 2, 2011 i think i'm losing my sanity and my grip on myself. anyone else joining me?
futuregopher Posted October 2, 2011 Posted October 2, 2011 I'm was close to losing it this morning but I know how you're feeling. I broke NC of 16 days this morning because of another freaking relapse. I'm just trying to stay as busy as possible to keep my mind off things...
mike588 Posted October 2, 2011 Posted October 2, 2011 i think i'm losing my sanity and my grip on myself. anyone else joining me? Oh yes, I know how you feel. You've just got to give it time,,, there really is nothing else. I'm 2 months into my living hell and it is much better but I still have "those days" on ocassion I don't know your story but guess you have been dumped like the most of us on this site. Your not alone.
lonelynyc Posted October 2, 2011 Posted October 2, 2011 I bottomed out yesterday. I went on a binge of self-pity, rage, and sadness. I think it took me losing my mind (I was shaking and crying for hours) to reach the point where I'm ready for a change. It's not love anymore, it has become so distorted I have made myself unhealthy over the breakup. I have been looking for quick ways to erase the pain, but that's hopeless. It sounds corny, but it's time to embrace the pain, make it a part of us that we don't hate. Look at it this way, you can't prevent things like the deaths of loved ones. Some people never get past personal tragedies like that. They bury themselves in a fog of booze, drugs, [insert your addiction here]. All of it is just self-loathing and a denial of life. We can't hate the fact that we are sad or suffering emotionally. It's something to be proud of when you can feel so deeply. To make it to the other side of this sea of hurt, we need to start accepting that this is the way we feel. No more running away, no more collapsing under its weight. Lucio, I don't even know you personally, but from my contact with you on LS over the past week I can tell that you are an extremely good-hearted, sensitive guy. Be proud of that. Know that someone like you could not, and will not be alone forever. You will love again because even though your heart is broken you had the courage to open it in the first place. Plenty of people never get there, they're so closed off emotionally. 1
Confussedheart Posted October 3, 2011 Posted October 3, 2011 i think i'm losing my sanity and my grip on myself. anyone else joining me? There are days that I defintley feel like that as well. It's hard to get through a day at times.
Author Lucio Posted October 3, 2011 Author Posted October 3, 2011 hey all, thanks for replying. it might sound a little wrong, but i'm actually glad i'm not alone. lonelynyc>> thanks for thinking that i'm such a wonderful guy.
samphs Posted October 3, 2011 Posted October 3, 2011 You are FOR SURE not alone, I was doing okay until I had to see my ex yesterday to pick up my cat, I had meltdown, complete meltdown (not in front of him). Every day is torture....
TheGrimSweeper Posted October 3, 2011 Posted October 3, 2011 I am having a really downer day myself and am entering a crisis i think. I want to change my career, im not happy where i currently work and my life. I want too just run off for a month to the other side of the world. Im still young, only 25, but I've grown so tired of the bar / drunk / singles scene. I'd honestly rather have cuddled up and watched a movie with my ex then go out and do the whole bar dating scene again. All I want to do is settle down with someone. Today is so far a low point for me, breakup was officially one week ago yesterday.
M2155 Posted October 3, 2011 Posted October 3, 2011 It gets better! I'm past it. Didn't think it would come but really starting to realize he wasn't the guy for me. This will get even better when I realize whoever IS the guy;). Started really thinking about his faults and flaws (which are hard to focus on) and been meeting new people just to show myself there are good people out there who will treat me better. Very important to take the mistakes of our past relationship (noticing red flags early, not being a doormat, not over-giving, etc...) and look forward to applying them with someone new. It's easier for me since my ex is in love with someone else so I eventually forced my brain to embrace moving on instead of dreading it. It's a waste of my time to hope he'll come back and he's not giving me any breadcrumbs- I think it might be different if we just split for space, GIGS, etc... The triggers are getting smaller, used to get that little pang when something reminded me of him and I still do, but not as intense. Now, the moment I run into my ex, I might be a heaping mess so we'll see! I don't know the secret to getting over the hopeless desperate feeling other than time and wanting to get over it (as weird as it sounds, some days you really don't). If I did, I'd be very rich!
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