Why is my ex acting like this?

[JengleBells83]

Ok so here it goes. My now ex and i (we dated for almost 4 months) were very good friends for 2 years before we started dating. He had a huge crush on me, asked me out, etc. and I always said no, because he lived 2 hours away. Fast forward to this past May, his birthday, and something happened...we TOTALLY hit it off, and it happened so naturally. I was a little hesistant at first because of the distance, but after a while, I couldn't control my feelings for him. He asked me to be his girlfriend, and that was it--we were facebook official, profile picture of us together, everything. And our relationship was awesome- we loved eachother pretty quick, and had our life plan in the works, talking about marriage and children, he gushed about me to all his friends, the guy was totally nuts about me, etc. We both agreed that this time it felt different than all our other relationships, and he told me I was the first girl ever that hes introduced to his mother, on purpose. Well, the last about 3 weeks of our relationship was pretty rocky- I had been going through a lot between my best friend having mental issues, to my grandfather who I loved more than anything passing away, to the hormonal rollercoaster I was on while on my birth control pills. On top of that, my grandfather dying and me being sad about it,, brought on depression in my boyfriend because his father had died years before and he was still sad about it. So the combination was bad, and I did say things to him that made it feel like the relationship was hopeless and i was scared, etc. I did hurt him, not on purpose, I was just scared of the future, and everything going on in my life made me a mess. So he calls me the end of last month, and basically cried on the phone for 2 hours, at times i couldnt even understand him...he said he needed a "break" and some space for us to figure ourselves out. I flat out asked him if he wanted to break up, and he said I don't know and he kinda went back and forth about it for awhile. He told me and my best friend (who was also his friend) that he wanted to be friends, and maybe it can work out later, he also told his other friend that he wanted to still be friends, and that he just needed some time. I apologized to him a miliion times. So 3 days later, I post on facebook about the fun im having with my girlfriends, etc. and he gets upset saying that I don't care about his feelings, and he changes his relationship status to single and says that hes tired of explaining to everyone why hes so miserable, and that he'll try to talk to me when he has time. So I find out a few days later, he is seeing this 19 year old girl that had a HUGE crush on him that he used to work with (he is 31, FYI). He never even mentioned this girls name to me the whole time we were dating, and had no interest. So he got mad that his friend told me about this girl he is dating, and when confronted, said "what do u want me to do, sit around and be miserable"? We went back a forth a little bit by text, I basically begged him to come back after some time, and he was a little wishy washy at first, saying that he couldnt promise that time would help, then just was flat out like NO. I asked him to mail me my things, and he said he didn't know when he'd have time, and he ended up breaking his phone on purpose. So basically one night I got a little drunk, and upset by the fact that he was posting all over his facebook about this girl (we were still friends on there at this point) and got so upset that I sent him a message saying that he is a borderline pedofile and how could you do this to me, etc...and I sent his girlfriend a message saying to watch out for him, hes not what he seems. After that, he blocked me. So a week later, in hopes of smoothing things over and just ending things nicely, I sent him a beautiful apology text, explaining myself- saying that I want him to be happy, that i treasure the time we had together, and hope someday we can be friends again. He responds that I don't need to apologize to him, that I can be upset with him all I want, and that I should apologize to his girl. So I did that as well. He didnt say anything else and I still felt like he was being rude to me. So I asked him the next night on text if he is being hurtful to me because he hates me/ doesnt care, ending it by saying I have no closure. He didnt say anything. He is on facebook a lot, and called his girl his girlfriend in posts, but still hasn't changed his status from single. i found that to be weird. Silly I know. Even after all this, i feel like if we could talk this out, it could possibly work in the future. This whole thing happened a month ago today, and I still think about him constantly (even though I have tried to talk myself out of it) and I still feel like we totally belong together, and that this is SO wrong. I guess I just don't understand how he couldnt care? or why he can't wish me well? Why he won't change his facebook status to "in a relationship" with her? or why he doesn't send me my things back? or why he doesnt just tell me to get lost, we're not going to be friends, please don't contact me again. It would be that simple, and he could be nice about it. This just isnt even like him to act like this. Thoughts?

Edited October 1, 2011 by JengleBells83