Buttercup84 Posted September 30, 2011 Posted September 30, 2011 It's October now , we broke up end of July . Kind of depressing how fast time goes . Next month it's our anniversary . Two years ago today I was blissfully unaware of how my life was going to change . two months till Christmas too , can't wait for this year to be over . It was crap .
immitable Posted September 30, 2011 Posted September 30, 2011 Let go Buttercup, let it go..... The misery we live in is only in our heads....
lonelynyc Posted September 30, 2011 Posted September 30, 2011 My anniversary with my ex came and went a few days ago. It's just another day to me now, all the pain makes the days sort of melt together. I have been thinking a lot about when we first met, the way I felt about life--just so much more optimistic. Nostalgia is a dangerous narcotic though. We tend to idealize what was never ideal. Here's to building new, better memories!
immitable Posted September 30, 2011 Posted September 30, 2011 see dumpees are better in touch with reality compared to dumpers who do whatever feels right in their distorted minds after they break up. One of gthe reasons why they end up rebounding. Each dumpee will tell you exactly what went wrong in the relationship, dumpers on the other side have no clue, I guess they're just happy to be "free".
geegirl Posted September 30, 2011 Posted September 30, 2011 It's October now , we broke up end of July . Kind of depressing how fast time goes . Next month it's our anniversary . Two years ago today I was blissfully unaware of how my life was going to change . two months till Christmas too , can't wait for this year to be over . It was crap . I caught my ex having sex with another woman on New Years, midnight. I remember thinking how sad I would be going through that day again come another New Year. A day symbolizing new beginnings and I got hurtled back into a pit of pain. Granted I have met someone and it never comes to mind anymore, but even before that, with time, space and a determination to work on recovering, those thoughst about the coming New Year, our anniversary were not looming over me anymore. I was just happy with the fact that I was getting over him. You will get there too. You have to put the work in. Controlling your thoughts. Focusing on you. Seeing a counselor. NC is not enough. It's what you do with this time, is what matters.
lonelynyc Posted September 30, 2011 Posted September 30, 2011 see dumpees are better in touch with reality compared to dumpers who do whatever feels right in their distorted minds after they break up. One of gthe reasons why they end up rebounding. Each dumpee will tell you exactly what went wrong in the relationship, dumpers on the other side have no clue, I guess they're just happy to be "free". You just hit the nail on the head. Dumpers (mine and seemingly everyone else's) spend most of their time post-breakup doing whatever insensitive or irresponsible **** they feel will improve their happiness in the moment. That's why they send mixed signals, break NC constantly, try to rush into new relationships. Instead of recognizing that they planted roots with someone and they need the time to heal and get to a better place now that it's over, they look for the quick fix. I wouldn't call it happy.
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