Never date single moms

October 1, 2011

I will never again date a man with kids.

Kids are so demanding, they take up so much time, money and energy and that takes away so much from any relationship.

I want to come first before I come second.

I also don't want the constant reminder that my man is forever attached to some other woman. No thanks.

Edited October 1, 2011 by FrustratedStandards

October 1, 2011

For me the memories of my un-fun childhood are too painful. When I see some kid's mother being illogical and not letting the tyke have a bit of fun, I remember what it was like to be that kid.

For godsakes, lady... LET the little bugger shoot birds with a BB gun and set the shrubs on fire!!!

my mother is more delusional than most women are. so yeah, i can relate.

not to say that my dad didn't have it coming when they divorced, he did. but he's delusional too. they were too good a match, in many ways.

and the fact that there are so many men raised by single mothers explains why younger men these days struggle so much with women. their mothers told them BS about women which more resembled an oprah episode than anything based on reality and they believed it.

October 1, 2011

Some single mom's have children and change - becoming more mature and focused on their child and can be an awesome person to have a relationship with.

Some single mom's have children and pawn them off to their mothers, only their for bed time or birthday parties, being the psuedo-mom for facebook.

Some single mom's are horrendous and cannot even take care of themselves and are extremely self centered, often using their child as some sort of manipulation and can be jealous if the man that comes in gives their child attention, this can also be combined with the second paragraph.

It depends on the women and her upbringing.

To Ely... LOL. You drive some hard truth but also some really situational bias. I aint mad at ya, keep living your dream.

I am evenly matched in your description of looks and often pay no attention to crap females. I am no white knight dude and I do believe there are some great women out there that can combat your posts but alas/sadly the majority is on your side of logic.

It is really not like that in europe, here in america where I lived all my life... it has tanked to a cess pool of multi-dating, what can u do for me attitudes and golden vagina syndrome. Liberal sex is disgusting on both gender's side in my eyes. But it is nothing more then history repeating itself from the 1970's.

October 1, 2011

Presumption of paternity a lot of men should look it up before dating single moms. presumption of paternity is when your apart of a kids life and the kids biological father isn't you can still end up paying child support in some states because the kid views you as a father figure, only in some states

That's a myth. Name the states. I couldn't find any. This happens in England & maybe canada & australia but not the US.

Presumption of Paternity is if your wife has a baby, it's considered yours because you are her husband.

I've never heard of some dude shacking up with a single mom, breaking it off & getting sued for child support IN THE U.S. unless the woman lies & tries to say it's his baby.

October 1, 2011

I couldnt date anyone with a kid for a few years...Im 24, couldnt date anyone with kids until about 30....I dont want at this point in my life, someone who will always be more important and priority number 1 for the person I'm seeing...not to mention trying to find baby sitters, etc.

I use protection and havent had any kids...it isnt that hard to do (not have a kid that is)...

I like kids, but I just dont want any in my life until Im around 29...I want to enjoy my twenties with as few responsibilities as possible, I want whom ever Im seeing and me to be able to on a whim take a weekend vacation or stay our stay out late when ever we feel like it.

October 1, 2011

Again, I am not a 15 year old girl nor am I a feminized male raised to be a woman's pup. I am a man's man. I was born to do a lot of fcking, a lot of drinking, a lot of fighting and a lot of bull fighting. Think of Hemingway minus the old age and the Nobel Prize.

Oh, and funny that you mention a dog's love. I've said before, on another thread, that true love and friendship can only come from dogs. Shame you'll never meet my dog and you know how dogs can internally sense who is a decent bloke.

Now that you mention it, you got me thinking about the everlasting bond men and dogs share since the first day ''our'' ancestors took the wolves in, and domesticated them. Dogs deserve the love of men; many men can't say the same about women LOL. Maybe if we create a loyalty gene to insert on women LOL.

Uh, you didn't call her "dude"; you called her "bro". That's a lot of backpedaling to make that one work.

And the main point you missed was that she was mocking you, not agreeing with you; that one kinda slipped right by ya...

Man, I just can't help the image - you talk about how you were born to do a lot of fcking, then spend the next two paragraphs on deep, beautiful, man/dog love. Just how close are you and your dog again?

Hysterical!! Good one Trimmer.

Elysian Powder, women can internally sense things too. What I sense from you is an undercurrent of animosity for the fairer sex. Someone hurt you, and you haven't yet recovered. And it shows. Focus on facing and healing that issue within yourself. It will be your best path to future happiness in life. Never easy, but always worthwhile. All the best to you.

Edited October 1, 2011 by Forever Learning

October 1, 2011

I used to subscribe to the "no single moms" rhetoric, but after reading Unhooked Generation, I changed my mind.

Let's be brutally honest. When you're a man in your mid to late 30s, it's practically IMPOSSIBLE to find a physically attractive woman who doesn't have kids. I'm serious. Before I met my now fiance, here's the choices I'd find:

Younger women who only want to party and/or only want douchebags
Childless attractive women my age who are holding out for a handsome doctor or some other kind of wealthy hot yuppie
Fat and/or ugly women I wasn't into
Childless attractive women loaded with baggage from every bad decision she's made
Single moms

You don't have a lot of choices out there when you're an older guy, especially if you want a solid LTR.

I have met single moms who fit the usual stereotype. They are the party girls who only had eyes for douchebags and these women easily spread their legs for them all. One day she ends up preggers, and he takes off at lightspeed. Now her life is a mess and she's struggling. Some get their life under control, but still are holding out for the "reformed bad boy", others now want a nice guy because they think the men they really want won't touch them now.

THEN...there were the other single moms I met. Pretty much all had similar stories of the marriage, house, start a family, then years later the husband wants out or is cheating. I've heard of the wife cheating and leaving her husband, but I don't associate with any of those classless tramps.

So what happens then to these women who ended up as a single mom from a married life? We lump them into the same boat with the wild party girls who got knocked up?

I still say when you date a single mom, it really depends on the woman, as they're not all the same. Here's how I address those 10.5 points:

10. Millions of Women Without Kids

Only if you're an older man who can seemingly pick up young hot tail. Like the 37 year olds I've seen who chase women aged 18-22. For most of the male populace aged 33 and up, you're stuck with the five choices I listed initially.

9. Too Busy

Mom or not...this is a reason to reject someone. I know work and kids take up a lot of time, but even when I contemplated dating single moms, I still adhered to the idea that if she's so busy that I can barely see her, then I won't bother. In reality, any single parent shouldn't be thinking about dating if they can't get adequate free time for a RL.

8. Never Ending Cycle

This is only because too many actual fathers or stepfathers don't raise those girls to believe in themselves. I've said over and over that most of these "screwed up females" are the ones who have very low self-esteem and thus equate their sense of self-worth on their looks and how men look at them. If you neglect a girl or push her to be "pretty over anything else", then you raise her to later continue the cycle.

Perhaps raise the girl to keep her legs shut unless the guy really commits, and to bring her boyfriends home so you can see if they're good men or douchebags. Even show tough love. Raise these women in a world of consequences.

7. Baby Weight

Frankly, if she let herself go during and after childbirth, you'll see it right off the bat. You can't hide obesity, and I have yet to see any woman who had a kid really look terrible afterwards when they worked to get the weight off. Maybe it's also because stretch marks never bothered me.

6. Baggage

Again...mom or not, men should stay away from ANY woman who has massive baggage. Granted it sucks when it seems most women have massive amounts of baggage, but this is why men should be willing to be alone before settling for someone with baggage.

5. Might Not Love Them Enough

I agree here. If you think you're going to "not love" her kids if you two get married, then don't do it.

4. Some Are Looking For Father Figures

Um...yeah. I think most marriage-minded women are looking for men who can be fathers. Even the childless ones.

3. No Need To Take Care Of Another Mans Seeds

I disagree. This goes in with #5. If you're unwilling to become part of a family, then don't mess with single moms. If you live in one of those states with the child support on the boyfriend laws, then bring it up and ask her to sign legal documents exempting you. If she wants to be offended, then decide if you want to chance it, and be willing to walk away, telling her you're not going to risk being screwed.

Frankly though, I never cared if the children are of "my blood". I'm sure though a lot of guys are not like this.

2. You Can’t Discipline The Kids

This is a test then of the mothering skills of the girl, and how much she'll support you. So when you lay down the law and the kid gets mad, the mother should step in and set the kid straight. If the mom gives you flack and says you have no right to anything having to do with her kids, then I'd dump her, or play by her game and then refuse to do anything with the kids and refuse to cough up one thin dime for them. Sounds like being a jerk, but if she wants to let another man into her life and even contemplate him as a potential father...she needs to become part of a team, not pick and choose when you play daddy and when you don't.

1. Baby Daddy Drama

Same thing as a childless woman with loads of drama from an ex. See how she handles it, and if she doesn't deal with it, move on.

.5 She May be Immature

This is a reason to dump any girl...not just single moms.

October 1, 2011

I served my sentence as a divorced single mother, I supported my brood sans child support & without much in the way of practical assistance from my ex. I saw that many single men viewed women in my situation as "damaged goods" I accepted that info, sucked it up, stayed alone & fulfilled my parental obligations

Now that I'm free and clear,I'm meeting divorced fathers, guys who married later in life and who have elementary school aged kids. None of these guys had any money left over after paying their child support obligations, many of them expect that I'll be a sport and "help out" fiscally, a couple wanted to live with me essentially for free "you have to pay your house note anyway, you say you care about me, why not prove it by helping me out letting me move in?" In a couple cases after a few months they'd be asking/assuming that I was eager to assume some responsibilities for their kids via buying them things or inconveniencing myself to provide free childcare.

I was "damaged goods" when you were single, my kids are grown & gone now, why should I even be remotely interested in dating you now that you're divorced with a pre-existing family? LOL, lemmie tell you, they don't like it at all when the shoe is on the other foot!

October 1, 2011

grkBoy - pretty much what i've seen.

But I have to say 99.9% of my problems with single moms off that list is.......Their just not that into me & need attention from someone.

the other .1% is me paying attention to them for too long.

I got kids of my own and only have a few evenings without them so I make the most of my free time. A single mom who can't find 1 day a week to spend with me san's kids & drama & BS is someone who really isn't serious about dating.

So I move on.

The guy who created this list actually does sound a little bitter because he kept trying to fit a square peg in a round hole.

October 1, 2011

That's a myth. Name the states. I couldn't find any. This happens in England & maybe canada & australia but not the US.

Presumption of Paternity is if your wife has a baby, it's considered yours because you are her husband.

I've never heard of some dude shacking up with a single mom, breaking it off & getting sued for child support IN THE U.S. unless the woman lies & tries to say it's his baby.

just like the proclaimed 'epidemic' of men dating women due to attraction to adolescent/teenage daughters, which has been posted several times on this forum by stupid people as well.

why are people so quick to believe urban legend (for lack of a better word)?

because it's a crutch. i'm single because god hasn't given me a wife/husband. i'm single because women want to trap me into paying for their kids. i'm single because men want to molest my daughter. the only time the assumptions fall down is when their delusion fails those children, then it's i did the best i could. only they didn't...they were delusional parents that raised delusional children.

October 1, 2011

I served my sentence as a divorced single mother, I supported my brood sans child support & without much in the way of practical assistance from my ex. I saw that many single men viewed women in my situation as "damaged goods" I accepted that info, sucked it up, stayed alone & fulfilled my parental obligations

Now that I'm free and clear,I'm meeting divorced fathers, guys who married later in life and who have elementary school aged kids. None of these guys had any money left over after paying their child support obligations, many of them expect that I'll be a sport and "help out" fiscally, a couple wanted to live with me essentially for free "you have to pay your house note anyway, you say you care about me, why not prove it by helping me out letting me move in?" In a couple cases after a few months they'd be asking/assuming that I was eager to assume some responsibilities for their kids via buying them things or inconveniencing myself to provide free childcare.

I was "damaged goods" when you were single, my kids are grown & gone now, why should I even be remotely interested in dating you now that you're divorced with a pre-existing family? LOL, lemmie tell you, they don't like it at all when the shoe is on the other foot!

I agree with you. Gender is meaningless. No one should be "expected" to financially support someone else's kids.

October 1, 2011

I served my sentence as a divorced single mother, I supported my brood sans child support & without much in the way of practical assistance from my ex. I saw that many single men viewed women in my situation as "damaged goods" I accepted that info, sucked it up, stayed alone & fulfilled my parental obligations

Now that I'm free and clear,I'm meeting divorced fathers, guys who married later in life and who have elementary school aged kids. None of these guys had any money left over after paying their child support obligations, many of them expect that I'll be a sport and "help out" fiscally, a couple wanted to live with me essentially for free "you have to pay your house note anyway, you say you care about me, why not prove it by helping me out letting me move in?" In a couple cases after a few months they'd be asking/assuming that I was eager to assume some responsibilities for their kids via buying them things or inconveniencing myself to provide free childcare.

I was "damaged goods" when you were single, my kids are grown & gone now, why should I even be remotely interested in dating you now that you're divorced with a pre-existing family? LOL, lemmie tell you, they don't like it at all when the shoe is on the other foot!

How exactly does a guy legally not pay child support?

How does he not get his wages garnished?

The few women I met who didn't get child support didn't get it because they didn't want the fathers in their kids lives at all or the father just disappeared.

Those that got little child support got it because the fathers had low paying jobs or got paid under the table.

October 1, 2011

The few women I met who didn't get child support didn't get it because they didn't want the fathers in their kids lives at all or the father just disappeared.

Those that got little child support got it because the fathers had low paying jobs or got paid under the table.

in which case they foolishly had children with a man unable to provide for them, which is a red flag that makes them?....damaged goods.

shoe = foot = fits.

October 1, 2011

How exactly does a guy legally not pay child support?
How does he not get his wages garnished?

The few women I met who didn't get child support didn't get it because they didn't want the fathers in their kids lives at all or the father just disappeared.

Those that got little child support got it because the fathers had low paying jobs or got paid under the table.

I'm a professional woman, my ex-husband was self-employed, the constant trips to court attempting to get any kind of real action on the child support issue were expensive & required me to take too much time off from my work, after awhile I just decided to focus on building my own career & taking care of my kids on my own rather than play cat & mouse games for a decade.

October 1, 2011

I'm a professional woman, my ex-husband was self-employed, the constant trips to court attempting to get any kind of real action on the child support issue were expensive & required me to take too much time off from my work, after awhile I just decided to focus on building my own career & taking care of my kids on my own rather than play cat & mouse games for a decade.

You must not be in the U.S. then.

Because in the U.S. you pay child support or they just take it from you. Period.

But, you gotta go to family court first. no lawyer required if you are a woman.

You just write a number down on a folded piece of paper & slide it over to the judge. j/k.

October 1, 2011

Anyone, kids or no kids, can have baggage, drama and be insecure.

I personally wouldn't want a r/ship with someone who has kids, I chose not to have any myself, for a number of reasons, including I'm just not interested, so it would be a bit odd if I chose a partner with kids, unless they were grown up maybe, but I also wouldn't exactly enjoy having a partner who's involved with his ex in a big way (been there, done that) cos of the kids, so I avoid men with kids, full stop.

A lot of people say you shouldn't date single moms and even single dads, do any of you feel like you could never date someone with kids? if so why?

I was reading an article and it was talking about how some single moms have drama, baggage, and can be immature.

heres the article:

http://www.top10point5.com/2011/09/top-105-reasons-to-never-date-single.html

October 1, 2011

Don't forget that you're thrown into jail if you miss a month of alimony payment; but the many thousands of men are bitter

U lucked out in the no-alimony department & the ex didn't try to take my house.

Just most of the stuff in it for her new apartment.

But, I eventually got new furniture. Besides, it's REALLY easy to clean when all you have is a china cabinet, recliner, end table & a TV with a stand. LOL!

October 1, 2011

How exactly does a guy legally not pay child support?
How does he not get his wages garnished?

The few women I met who didn't get child support didn't get it because they didn't want the fathers in their kids lives at all or the father just disappeared.

Those that got little child support got it because the fathers had low paying jobs or got paid under the table.

Agreed, but there are also plenty of dads who own/run businesses, and thus use accounting tricks to come out with little to no "wages". Thus they slip by.

Others simply don't pay, but there's too much red tape and bureaucratic bull that it takes months, sometimes years to get the deadbeat into court and thus get things settled straight. I knew one mom who's ex simply didn't show up time and time again, but since he lived in the next state they couldn't easily nail him. Another who kept getting warnings until he finally caved when he faced jail time.

Plus there are those few who are making babies all over and thus have several women garnishing their wages. Idiots.

I'm not giving the women who slept with those dbags the pass, but it's not easy anymore to cleanly get that money when you have a deadbeat dad.

Would you believe one guy simply ran to Canada and now lives there...mainly to avoid responsibility?

October 1, 2011

Maybe you could tell that to the matriarchy that the western world is? Women would undoubtedly change the anti-male laws because you asked for it, and feminism's core is centralized on goals such as, brotherhood, equality, and justice.

Teenage mutant turtles!

Many men did strike back at the injustices. They simply stopped getting married. Think about all the women who complain how the man of their dreams refuses to marry.

Some guys got their tubes tied in order to avoid it all.

If you think women are the enemy, then simply don't deal with them. Plain and simple.

October 1, 2011

What I can't believe is that you are a seemingly intelligent young man but you can't come to terms with the fact that a huge number of men are exploited by women and by the state; it's all about the few deadbeat dads, to hell with the suffering men are in. Disgusting.

Because I have yet to meet a single mom who is fitting the stereotype you speak of.

You can claim I'm being sympathetic to the women, but it's funny when the mom is spending her time working and taking care of the kid while the father buys a new sports car and barely ever makes time to see his kid...or worse he dumps said kid on his new girlfriend so he can go out with the fellas.

Do I think the divorce laws are biased towards women? HELL YEAH.

We can't deny the factor that more people refuse to or see marriage as outdated...and I believe most of this is men who are fed up.

My fiance's brother is in such a mess. A bitch of an ex who became a lesbian and negligent mom, but she insisted on custody of the two girls because she didn't want to be the one coming up with child support. Even her own parents think she's out of her mind.

ALTHOUGH...my fiance's brother and his ex and family are all in Slovakia...not here.

In the end it's the children who suffer, and I'm not saying your points are BS, but with my own eyes I see more cases of a deadbeat dad as opposed to the "evil bitch" who's milking the ex for everything she can get.

October 1, 2011

A while ago I was having lunch with my mother and grandmother. Both of them know that I do very poorly with women and I that I really want a girlfriend.

We were talking about my age (30) and my dating pool which is getting smaller.

My grandmother suggested that I start going after single moms. I looked at her funny and told her that I have no interest in dating a woman with kids. Then she got mad at me and said that because of my age, I should consider women with kids.

Seriously, date a twenty something woman who has kids for whatever reason? No way. I'm sure that the vast majority of young single mothers are that way because of a bad decision(s.) Women who got married, had kids and divorced young are rare. And even I wouldn't want to be a part of that situation.

I was raised by a single mother, I know how hard it is for the woman. And that's a big reason why I wouldn't get involved.

October 1, 2011

There are way too many factors to consider to give a definite yes or no answer to dating a single mother. It would depend on why she is a single mother and what she learned from it and her views on fatherhood, etc.

October 1, 2011

Agreed, but there are also plenty of dads who own/run businesses, and thus use accounting tricks to come out with little to no "wages". Thus they slip by.

Others simply don't pay, but there's too much red tape and bureaucratic bull that it takes months, sometimes years to get the deadbeat into court and thus get things settled straight. I knew one mom who's ex simply didn't show up time and time again, but since he lived in the next state they couldn't easily nail him. Another who kept getting warnings until he finally caved when he faced jail time.

Plus there are those few who are making babies all over and thus have several women garnishing their wages. Idiots.

I'm not giving the women who slept with those dbags the pass, but it's not easy anymore to cleanly get that money when you have a deadbeat dad.

Would you believe one guy simply ran to Canada and now lives there...mainly to avoid responsibility?

Ya know, other than those getting paid under the table, now that I think about it, the guys not paying child support really don't have anything to loose. So yeah I guess they can just skip town.

But I know guys who don't have a pot to piss in, moved in with parents ect & are paying the full %from pay my state allows in child support.

There is no skipping on child support for them. But then, they do have tax returns.

October 1, 2011

but with my own eyes I see more cases of a deadbeat dad as opposed to the "evil bitch" who's milking the ex for everything she can get.

I'd say it's about even in my experience.

Like I said, I know men getting screwed over.

However, I also blame them. I didn't cave. I didn't loose my rights as a parent to my ex. They did. The courts actually WANT to see split custody but at the same time, they aren't going to just give it.

You gotta work for it which is wrong but it's better than nothing.

I also meet women who don't get support. Don't have a good job & looking for a guy to move in with them. Uh, no. I'm not going to do that to my kids. Their way too young for that kind of chaos.

That majority though is women who get very little support because the ex is a looser with no real job or money.

so they get what they can out of them then let them see the child once a week or never. However if a guy is only seeing his kid once a week, again it's because he either didn't fight or really isn't interested in being a father.

Their pissed at the guy. That much I do know. LOL!

However the situation is ALWAYS the same.

Mother is smoking hot, selfish, ton's of guy friends, thinks it's ok to go on "dates" (hang out alone) with guy friends.

Father's, it's funny but I seem to meet these guys real quick when their "coincidentally" dropping off or picking up the kid for the weekly visitation when i'm there.

I do meet them & I can clearly see they are thugs, player's, complete D-bag's ect. Once I realize i'm in that type of situation I Flee.

sorry, don't want to deal with it.

Edited October 1, 2011 by phineas

October 1, 2011

Yeah, give a break to the poor things; it's not their fault that after having at their disposal dozens and dozens of birth control methods, they become pregnant.

The majority of the women in their 20's and single mothers are so because they tried to make an Alpha male/bad boy/casanova to commit to them by puncturing the condom or ''forgetting'' to take the pill; women in their 30's are single mothers because they were bored and wanted new cock and to have their obscene and typically lysine sexual adventures financed by their ex-partners.

http://youtu.be/vBbrmqXUVZA

learn from the father himself what many women have been doing for decades and what they will do even more in this climate of no money.

your a fan of tom leykis, thanks for dropping these beta males/doormats some knowledge :D

women get benefits from having kids, they will never stop, they can get help from the government, child support, and if they have a kid with a rich guy they can live a lifestyle that they couldn't get themselves by demanding $20,000 a month for 1 kid lol:D

Sign In

Never date single moms

Recommended Posts

FrustratedStandards

thatone

Dazdnconfuzed

phineas

Casablanca

Forever Learning

grkBoy

soserious1

phineas

thatone

grkBoy

phineas

thatone

soserious1

phineas

HeavenOrHell

phineas

grkBoy

grkBoy

grkBoy

somedude81

Woggle

phineas

phineas

Top10point5

What's New

My Activity Streams

More...