IntenseLover Posted September 30, 2011 Posted September 30, 2011 (edited) Just wanted to get some opinions about a situation that happened to me. I met a woman a few years older than me on a dating website. Briefly, she viewed my profile and I got a notification of that. I contacted her with a slick line about her "looking but not buying," and I guess that got her attention and we started messaging back and forth. After a week, she emailed me her number and we started to talk on the phone and text. A week after that she and I were ready to meet in person. Long story long... We decided to meet at a Starbucks in her area (first meeting). When I arrived she was already sitting inside. I could see her, plus she guided me there on the phone, so I knew she was already there. At any rate, I go inside and after using the restroom, I sat at "her" table. Conversation was interesting, however, the Starbucks was closing with 30 minutes of me arriving. We mutually didn't want to end the conversation or the night. She told me that she didn't want to take me to her house just yet (even as a suggestion to go to her house was ever made), and I naturally understood. So I suggested that we sit in my car because it was freezing and I could tell by the way she was holding herself, she was cold. She quickly agreed and we got in. Me in the driver's seat and her in the passenger's. Within one hour we both felt comfortable with each other and she told me that when she first saw me enter Starbucks her first thought was, "whoa, he's hot. Needless to say, we ended up in the back seat of my car making out. Nothing raunchy, just kissing and some subtle touching. The conversation then transformed into some mild talk about sex. Things like the last time either of us had sex. During that conversation she kept referring to our ability to control ourselves if I was to go to her home. I told her that I was able to control myself but she said she would not be strong enough...so after a few more kisses and touches...we ended the night. After that night we spoke once on the phone and several times through text and then all of a sudden, that was it...no more contact. I don't remember exactly what happened, however after a month or so, she contacted me asking how I was doing and if we could meet again...and she offered to take me to dinner. I agreed. We again met in her area, which was just 25 miles from me, at a nice restaurant...one of her favorites I later found out from her. This time, she gave me directions to her house and I drove there to pick her up. I remember thinking, "sheesh, she has a really nice house." Continuing on, we had dinner and more great conversation. After we left the restaurant, she said she wanted to take me out to a bar for a drink...now I'm not much of a drinker...not even socially, and she knew this from our previous meeting, not to mention conversations we had over the phone prior to meeting. HERE'S WHERE THE NIGHT GOT VERY PECULIAR TO ME... She seemed a little bothered by the fact that I didn't want to drink and be the one stuck driving and she instructed me to drive to her house. Right after sensing she was bothered, I asked her if there were any bars closer to her house so that my drive to take her home wouldn't be long...thus lowering the risk of getting pulled over after drinking. She didn't answer me directly but "calmly" demanded me to take her home so she could use the bathroom. When we arrived and pulled in her driveway, we continued talking, while sitting in my car. The conversation was about how uncomfortable she was with having me at her house. She must have repeated her statement about not being comfortable with me at her house, because me being there would lead to sex, about 5 times. I kept reassuring her that I wouldn't touch her and kept reminding her of the fact that we haven't even touch each other once this second meeting. But she just kept going on and on about how my being at her home would lead to sex. Now at this point I was thinking to myself, "go take your piss and I'll wait here for you in the car." No sooner than I finished my thought, she reached to open the car door and said, "well, can we finish this inside because I have to pee?" I got out and walked into her house following her of course. When I got inside she kicked off her heels and ran down a long hallway to the restroom I assumed. I waited out in the front room (primary living room leading from the foyer). I don't know what she was doing back there but I was just looking at the pictures she had on the walls and shelves of this room...still at awe at how nice and huge her place was. She then goes into the kitchen and calls me. I go into the kitchen and she is standing there with this extremely uncomfortable expression on her face and within her body language. Then she again started up again with how uncomfortable she was with me there. As I once again reassured her that nothing is going to happen, she went on to tell me that during the month or so she and I didn't contact each other she went to Monterey with some dude for a weekend. Monterey is similar to going to San Francisco for those who have never heard of it. In other words, it's can be a romantic place for a guy to take a girl. Her mentioning this caught my attention and during the conversation about the weekend, I asked her if they had sex and she told me no. So then I asked her how didn't that lead to sex and it was a little hotel room, but me being at her house would lead to sex. She didn't answer me of course she rolled over the question with another statement of how uncomfortable she was. So finally my "grown man" spidey sense kicked in and I realized this broad doesn't trust her own dang horny self. So I told her she's making me feel uncomfortable now because I'm beginning to feel like I'm a rapist or something....and I told her I would leave and I did so. She called me while I was in the car driving and tried to explain...but at that point I wasn't trying to hear anything she was saying. There's a little more to the ending...but it's not important enough to explain... What baffled me about the whole ordeal was two things... First before we met up the second time for dinner, I asked her to wear a shirt with cleavage so I could have something to stare at during dinner (she has huge breasts). I asked in a joking/serious manner and we both laughed. She never said she would...BUT SHE SHOWED UP TO DINNER IN ALL HER CLEAVAGE GLORY... And the second thing that baffled me was the fact that we smooched like two high school kids in the back seat of my car within an hour and a half of meeting each other in person for the first time. What do you guys think was the deal? Does that make sense to you? Everyone knows a man and a women staying in a hotel, and even worse, a hotel in Monterey for an entire weekend is going to lead to some type of sexual activity. Should a guy (or girl) EXPECT sex if a girl (or guy) goes to stay an entire weekend with him (or her) at a hotel? No...or well, YES! I'm just kidding...he shouldn't expect it...but come on. In other words, an entire weekend hotel stay seems like the more logical leading to sex choice over visiting someone at there 3500 square foot home. Opinions? My apologies for such a lengthy post. Thanks in advance... I.L. Edited September 30, 2011 by IntenseLover
Author IntenseLover Posted September 30, 2011 Author Posted September 30, 2011 Thanks Royalty, But let me clear something up. I didn't mean to give the impression that I was wondering why the girl didn't "choose me." I just want to make sure that someone else besides myself thought that it was strange that she would tell me our meeting will lead to sex...and then in the same breath tell me that her going to a hotel for the weekend with a guy...whether it was me or another guy and that doesn't give her a feeling it will lead to sex. (And swear to me they DIDN'T, which of course I knew better) I just thought it was odd. BTW, she's contacted me since through text and I just haven't replied simply because I realize the girl is a little coo coo or as you said...indulgent. Oh and the message was "How have you been you sexy boy?" So the first meeting was making out in the back seat of my car... The second meeting was this might lead to sex.... And now I'm a "sexy boy." The Monterey dude can have her...LOL Thanks again.
bluenightowl Posted September 30, 2011 Posted September 30, 2011 I think she had sex with him as well given her answers. But regardless, you seem to be having fun. If you're not emotionally attached, you could just date her, but don't expect it to go too far. She seems flirtatious, but also a bit confused. If you get close to sex, I'd just find out if she is seeing anyone else, unless you don't care. But STD's and emotions are real and she sounds like she has no trouble meeting men.
oaks Posted September 30, 2011 Posted September 30, 2011 She then goes into the kitchen and calls me. I go into the kitchen and she is standing there with this extremely Am I the only one who was hoping this was going to lead to a description of what she had changed into followed by a tale of things getting energetic on the kitchen table? Anyway, you asked for opinions... she's either horny or unhinged or both. I wonder if she was hoping you would call her bluff along these lines: her: blah blah this might lead to sex. you: Fine with me, baby! Let's go!
neowulf Posted September 30, 2011 Posted September 30, 2011 You know it's odd, but I almost got the impression during that whole story that she was "trying" to flirt/suggest you two have sex, but didn't want to initiate it directly. Women often "imply" what they mean, rather than saying it directly. The fact she repeated 5 times ".. it might lead to sex" says to me that's exactly *what* she hoped was happening. You thought she wanted reassurance you weren't going to force yourself on her.. where I think she was actually wanting you to jump her, but her pre-conceptions of what a womens role is in these situations threw her off. I don't know man, it just seems to me like she's a regular women with some baggage. Obviously, I wasn't there, just going on the stuff you've mentioned.
Cypress25 Posted September 30, 2011 Posted September 30, 2011 I agree with neowulf, I think she was trying to put ideas in your head. She didn't want to initiate sex herself, because she didn't want to give the impression that she's a slut. So she was trying to get you to initiate sex. She was basically saying "I guarantee you'll get sex if you make a move." She kept repeating herself because you weren't taking the hint. This kind of behavior certainly qualifies as "coo coo." She doesn't know how to communicate and she's playing mind games with you. It's no wonder you couldn't figure her out! You're smart to stay away from her, she would just run you around in circles.
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