eleanorhurting Posted September 30, 2011 Posted September 30, 2011 Day 2 NC and Im starting to feel weak already
antz2411 Posted September 30, 2011 Posted September 30, 2011 just slap yourself a couple times when you start feeling like this. usually helps
sleepykitten Posted September 30, 2011 Posted September 30, 2011 Am on day 23 and feeling like that, but last week was fine, its a bumpy road, just think "this will pass" if you give in, you just start the cycle of hurt and powerlessness all over again. Stay strong, grit your teeth and ride it out.
Author eleanorhurting Posted September 30, 2011 Author Posted September 30, 2011 so hard! Hanging in there!!!
geegirl Posted September 30, 2011 Posted September 30, 2011 Day 2 NC and Im starting to feel weak already You are going through what we all have gone through during the start of NC. It's going to get harder before it gets better Eleanor. But you must barrel through. Remind yourself why you are doing this everytime you get weak. Those weak moments will come in waves but you must not react to them. It's like an addict beating an addiction. Remember he is your source of pain and he cannot comfort you. And if you go to him for comfort, it will be temporary and soon the pain will be back again. You have to deal with the pain and overcome it yourself. If you don't you will keep yourself in a vicious cycle. When it comes, rationally talk to yourself. Write down the reasons why you are doing this. Imagine in your head what breaking NC will do to you, visualizing talking, ending the convo. and then struggling through the pain and confusion again. Remind yourself of the aftermath should you break NC. The definition of insanity is repeating the same thing over and over again and expecting different results. You know the outcome is going to be the same. This pain is temporary and soon you will be yourself again. But breaking NC, that pain is indefinite and it will keep you stuck and hurt for as long as you keep yourself in that cycle. Come here and post when you feel weak. Talk to your friends or a family member and ask for help in reminding you about the bad and why it's not a good idea for you to break it. Give yourself goals -- I will give myself one hour to keep away from contacting him -- and by then the urge will pass. Go for a walk. Go and workout. Find a hobby that you like and start diving into it. There is a great book that helped me stay focused on NC. "Don't Call That Man" and everytime I felt weak, I would read and rationalize in my head and the feeling would pass. Get on www.baggagereclaim.co.uk and read the articles on NC. Amazing advice and her other articles about empowering yourself will help you feel motivated and positive about your decision to NC. Don't react. Don't give in. The outcome will never be what you hope and expect.
mike588 Posted September 30, 2011 Posted September 30, 2011 Listen to geegirl, she is 100% correct. I know it's so difficult. I'm about 45 days in No Contact and the temptations to contact them are huge but I'm so glad I didn't break it. Don't do it!!
BLuvv Posted September 30, 2011 Posted September 30, 2011 Keep strong. I agree it is hardest in the beginning. I'm feeling kind of numb today (4th day), some of the buzz from making the decision has worn off. But still going nonetheless. Don't do what I did and go back for a year over and over, it was hell, I lived it and I don't want to go back!!! I wouldn't wish that pain on anyone!! B
Author eleanorhurting Posted October 1, 2011 Author Posted October 1, 2011 Today I drank alcohol out of a coconut in front of the ocean. I wanted to share it with him (i know stupid sharing even when im having fun with him) but im sharing it here instead! I made it through NC day 2!
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