TheStylist Posted September 30, 2011 Posted September 30, 2011 If someone tied his self worth to something, then the threat of losing this certain thing is equal to the threat of losing his self worth, and the actual loss of this thing is like the actual loss of his self worth. If someone ties his self worth to the acceptance of his partner he becomes more attached to his partner because a break up will mean the loss of his own self worth. This person cries, feels bad and becomes depressed thinking that his soulmate left him and that he can never find as someone charming as this person when reality it's just the fear of people. What will people say when they know I was dumped? How will I look after everyone knows? How will I face those who predicted that the relationship will never work? How will I face those who told me that I wasn't good enough for my ex partner? What will come to their minds when they find out I was dumped? We feared people's response. People do care about their appearance in front of others more than anything else and although this happens in different degrees still everyone cares about his looks and public image. One of the most common beliefs that people have about being dumped is that it means that you are not good. It's this belief that make some people feel really bad after a breakup because for them, being dumped means you are not good enough or not even worthy. So the very important question you should ask after being dumped or after losing someone is " Am I really sad because I lost him or it is just my ego?" If you are a normal human being, the ego involvement will definitely be a part of the bad feeling you are experiencing and not just because of loving the person. In short, don't involve yourself in any relationship if you don't know your own worth. Because by doing so, you become co-dependent with the person's love and by losing this very person means losing yourself in the process. If you have enough confidence and are emotionally stable, accepting reality would be easier for you and your coping to painful break up will be a lot shorter, and most likely you will consider it as positive experience than a disaster and wallow in self pity for months, even years.
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